bdsdt Posted March 25, 2015 Posted March 25, 2015 Hey everybody, I'm going through a tough time currently. My ex from two years ago reached out to me in a very strange way, and i'm trying to make sense of it. I'm a little disappointed I am not indifferent about her reaching out. Long story short: I was with this woman for two years, we lived together, in a lot of ways she became my best friend as well my girlfriend. but she had a pretty bad drinking problem as well as a temper. This led to a lot of verbal abuse, and she has hit me a few times. ultimately after two years, she dumped me, i was sadly co dependent i couldn't have walked away back then. i moved back home, and basically did a 180 with my life. I'm happy, I'm in an extremely healthy relationship, I am almost finished with a pre-med degree. My ex ended up getting married a year ago to the person she dated after me. We have had absolutely no contact with each other. I avoided her social media sites like the plague. The only contact we've had is that she tends to befriend my exes since our break up. One being a girl i dated after her, so they had never crossed paths, it really bothered me and i never understood it but i just thought she was being vindictive. After two years of silence, i woke up with to a message from her that opened "are you awake? if not i don't want to talk." she went on to tell me her spouse was getting results from a biopsy and she needed a friend." I was pretty surprised to receive a message, i looked into it a bit more and saw she had been drinking that night. I replied, said i was sorry that was the situation she was in. She just said thank you for being there, and with that went on ignoring me. I am a little confused as to what the heck all that was. I am bothered that I am so taken aback by it, I wish i could just shrug it off. Does anyone know what this means? Is this just manipulation? or is there something less evil to it?
Methodical Posted March 25, 2015 Posted March 25, 2015 Your relationship was toxic. You have both moved on and in this particular situation, I'd suggest you not allow her issues to become your own or interfere with your life. You are happy and in a healthy relationship and that wasn't a process that could happen over night, yet she could very well pull you back down if you allow her to. Your ex sounds like a stalker or someone who manipulates people in such a way as to maintain just enough rope to trap them in her snare. Your response was short and to the point. I'd leave it there and decline future contact. You need to continue looking Forward and leave the past behind. 1
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