How do people combat the dreaded 'I want her back' mornings?

[J007]

I have been in NC for 1 month and I can normally go the day without any real feelings of wanting my ex back .. its just mornings !

 

What do people do in the mornings to combat this? It really does put me in an awful state for work .

I know the obvious thing is time .

[Toodaloo]

If I wake up like this I force myself up and out of bed grab some good music that it up lifting. Dance round the house naked or run the hoover round or any thing productive then get my backside into work.

 

4:30 this morning I was jumping round the living room... Went back to bed again which has kind of messed up my day!

[Haydn]

Yes you are right, time. Guess it depends how long you were together. As you find other things and people to fill that void it does become easier. Personally i don`t think it`s too good to suppress it as it could find other ways to come out. It will relent.

 

Took me quite a long time but for others less.

[jus d'orange]

I try to put on music that isn't sad and that I don't associate with her in any way, usually something I love that comes from earlier in my life. Then I sing along and have a nice breakfast.

 

Sometimes I kind of numb out trying to read the news or something, but that doesn't really make me feel better, just kind of delays the negative feeling.

 

The other thing I do is go for a run.

 

You'll have to find what works for you, and then there's no guarantee that it'll always work. I'm in a similar place to you -- it's been 5-6 weeks and I'm still struggling mornings and nights mostly. But it's alright to have a tough time. These are just my tips on trying to make it better.

[totenkopf]

I am just the same, its always the morning that I will wake up and feel so empty

[Taramere]

After a bad break up, I bought a Pimsleur course to teach myself Spanish. I was listening to two or three lessons a day. I retained practically none of it in my longer term memory - but at the time, it certainly helped to take my mind off things. Anything that gets you using your brain and learning a new skill tends to be a good way of staving off those bad feelings you're talking about. Learning new skills gives you a sense of purpose, and that will fill the void. You just have to summon up the energy and motivation to get down to it.

[PegNosePete]

Every time you wake up like this, make a list of the reasons that you really don't want her back, why it would never work out between you, and how your life will be better without her.

 

You might want to think of some reasons while you're not in that mood though, otherwise it might be hard to think of them at the time!

 

After doing this a few times, the list will probably be quite long. Print it out and pin it to your bedroom ceiling.

[SethDamien]

There are days i wake up crying, especially when i have dreams involving my ex.

 

Most of the mornings i spend walking my dogs. It gives me a sense of purpose for them and prevent wallowing in self pity.

 

If you're not a pet lover, some mornings i spend taking that anger out like doing bit of cleaning, or working out like doing sit-ups, push ups. Basically anything to get my heart racing. I dont have an athletic built though and I never go to gym. But the added endorphin helps i guess.

[Jimmyjackson]

It's always the nights that affect me, when I'm on my own in a silent house and can hear nothing but my alarm clock ticking.

 

Try take a walk, or I start singing some of my favourite songs and it distracts me for a bit.

[mightycpa]

I used to go running. It helped a lot.

[ZiggyZoo]

I'm the same, mornings are my worst time. I just remind myself that I'm working towards not even being sad once a day, and am thankful that I've gotten to the point where it's not all the time. Music helps a lot too. I've also had to do some tough love and bully myself out of it.