Le Corb Posted March 22, 2015 Posted March 22, 2015 (edited) We met a week ago at a dinner overseas, in a city that we were both visiting. She is one of the most amazing women I have ever met. We had some wonderful conversations together, we didn't talk to any other dinner guests. Before leaving she gave me a card with a hand written quote by one of her favorite authors, we kissed each other on the cheeks to say goodbye and she whispered 'call me". We texted each other that evening, saying how wonderful it was, what an amazing person you are to one another, and we cannot wait to see each other tomorrow. (We were both leaving the city in 2 days.) The next day we met up at a bar in the evening, we had a great time. We talked about our lives, she is moving to a different country in a week, she asked me to visit and we both have been thinking about moving to France, she wanted a life together. We kissed 5, 6 times with the most comforting cuddles. It was late, she said she had paperworks and emails to do back at the hotel, and she has an early start tomorrow. But we will see each other tomorrow evening. I respected her decision, we kissed and parted. The next day knowing that it was going to be the last time I see her during this trip (she is leaving the next day). I went out and bought her a gift (jewelry), as a parting present before we see each other again. We both have full schedules during the day, and different dinners to attend on the same night. At dinner she texted me saying that we are meeting up in the city centre in 2 hours, so I left my event early to meet up with her. A couple of hours later she texted and said that she is still with clients, they are having a celebration drink. I texted back saying that it's completely ok (we are both in the same industry I understand.), I don't mind waiting, I would really like to see her before she leaves. So I waited, half an hour later I got a text saying that she is back at the hotel, feeling really tired. I called her and told her how I feel, it has been a while since I had feeling for anyone, I would move country for her, if she feels the same way about me. She said yes and asked me to have breakfast with her tomorrow morning before she leaves. I was sad about not being able to see her and give her the present... In the morning I went to her hotel, we chatted over breakfast. She said she just got out of a 10 year relationship (with a woman, she is bi), they separated last May. She wants to take it slow, she wants to visit a couple of cities together to see operas in the coming month, she said likes me, she wants me to visit her in the country that she is moving to and spend time together. I told her that I had a horrible divorce myself 4 years ago. I have not felt for anyone since, only short relationships, and I have said no to so many people. But I really felt something for her. It is a big commitment to move country, we just met, we have only kissed, we barely know each other. She said we will write each other letters, the old fashioned way to get to know each other (which we both enjoy). And she said 'don't worry, take a little risk" before we kissed goodbye. It has been a week, she is traveling, a lot of time in the air. I came back to my part of the world, we texted a few times. Only short answers, she has a lot to do, moving country is a big thing. I didn't give her the gift, I will give it to her next time we meet. We planned to see some operas together in a different country in 2 months time. It was 2 days ago. I really don't know what to do. I know she just got out of a long term relationship. I don't want to be her rebound. We both felt something special, I really like her. I don't want to say the wrong thing, or sound too pushy, to make her feel uncomfortable in anyways. And I have never dated bi girls before. I want her to feel comfortable and loved. Any advice will be very much appreciated. Thank you so much for reading this. Edited March 22, 2015 by Le Corb
fitnessfan365 Posted March 22, 2015 Posted March 22, 2015 Buying jewelry for a woman you barely know tells me that you're too invested. Also, when a woman tells you she got out of a ten year relationship and "wants to take it slow" that means you're setting yourself up to be a rebound. Plus, why would you want to date a woman that busy? If she has that much going on in her life, and still has emotional issues from her last relationship, my advice would be to stop dealing with her. Why not focus on meeting a woman in your immediate vicinity that you can actually spend time with and who is emotionally available? 1
Author Le Corb Posted March 22, 2015 Author Posted March 22, 2015 (edited) Buying gift on the second date is something that I rarely do. We both got along immediately, there is something special. I haven't felt it for a very long time. I dated many women from my immediate vicinity, they barely understand me. We both travel a lot, and we are on the same level to communicate. She is different. I know all the warning signs, rebound, long distant, emotional mixup. For some reason, I really want to try to make this work. Perhaps it's love after all, or madness. Maybe they are the same thing. Edited March 22, 2015 by Le Corb
fitnessfan365 Posted March 22, 2015 Posted March 22, 2015 Buying gift on the second date is something that I rarely do. We both got along immediately, there is something special. I haven't felt it for a very long time. I dated many women from my immediate vicinity, they barely understand me. We both travel a lot, and we are on the same level to communicate. She is different. I know all the warning signs, rebound, long distant, emotional mixup. For some reason, I really want to try to make it work. Perhaps it's love after all, or madness. Perhaps they are the same thing. Both men and women tend to be attracted to people that are harder to attain. So the fact that she's harder to get, probably has you thinking about her way more than you usually would a woman that you could date easier. Just something to think about. 1
Author Le Corb Posted March 22, 2015 Author Posted March 22, 2015 Most of the time I don't connect with the people who I am dating. Wit her we felt comfortable with each other. It's hard to put into words, as if we understood each other without speaking. Kind strange. I hope she still feels the same way about me. And I would really like to make this work, or at least try my best. She is quite special. Certainly not because of she is hard to get.
kendahke Posted March 22, 2015 Posted March 22, 2015 Buying gift on the second date is something that I rarely do. We both got along immediately, there is something special. I haven't felt it for a very long time. I dated many women from my immediate vicinity, they barely understand me. We both travel a lot, and we are on the same level to communicate. She is different. I know all the warning signs, rebound, long distant, emotional mixup. For some reason, I really want to try to make this work. Perhaps it's love after all, or madness. Maybe they are the same thing. Then take things very, very slowly. She is sounding as if she's pulling back from you. You need to follow her cue and pull back some to see if she has enough interest to seek you out. That will tell you everything you need to know. A text/phone call takes 30 seconds out of 24 hours. You will know if she has the same level of interest with you if she does either of those. If she does not, then she was just caught up in the moment and really isn't that interested in you in the way in which you'd like for her to be.
fitnessfan365 Posted March 22, 2015 Posted March 22, 2015 Don't get me wrong. It's not like you're telling yourself "She's hard to get and that's why I'm into her." I'm sure that right now you feel strongly about her for the reasons you mentioned. However, subconsciously being attracted to someone that's harder to obtain is human nature. Her absence is making you grow fonder and makes her seem more important than the average woman you barely know.
Author Le Corb Posted March 22, 2015 Author Posted March 22, 2015 Thanks for the advice. I will take it very slow then. Should I stop contactng her? It has been a day since I heard back from her. She said yes to the operas, if she is pulling back, she wouldn't plan the trips together right? I am interesting to hear what ladies have to say about this. Thanks so much.
fitnessfan365 Posted March 22, 2015 Posted March 22, 2015 Thanks for the advice. I will take it very slow then. Should I stop connecting her? It has been a day since I heard back from her. She said yes to the operas, if she is pulling back, she wouldn't plan the trips together right? I am interesting to what ladies have to say about this. Thanks so much. Since she already agreed to the date, I'd just give her some space since she is really busy. If you don't hear from her, shoot her a quick text a few days before the opera just to touch base and confirm. But other than that, I'd say just rely on the fact that you have plans with her and give her space. Out of curiosity, how far out in the opera? Is it this next week, a few weeks from now, etc?
Author Le Corb Posted March 22, 2015 Author Posted March 22, 2015 It's a month away, and it's in a city that is about 20 hours away from where I live. 2 hours for her. She wanted me to visit the city that she is moving to last week, I couldn't, had to come back. Maybe I should have done that.
fitnessfan365 Posted March 22, 2015 Posted March 22, 2015 I don't know man. It seems like you're jumping through a lot of hoops for her. You're willing to lock down your schedule for a month out, and travel 20 hours when she only has to travel two. Also, it's good that you didn't drop your plans before to accommodate her. But the fact that she wanted you to come to her yet again, may be an indicator that her interest level isn't super high. What I'd recommend at this point is to give her lots of space and not rush into anything. After all, a lot can happen in a month. If you do end up getting together for the opera, I'd recommend trying to make plans a bit more immediate after that (1 week out tops) and try to make it more even in terms of travel. You shouldn't always have to go out of your way to see her. She has to put in some effort too.
Author Le Corb Posted March 22, 2015 Author Posted March 22, 2015 I will be going to that part of the world any way around that time. So it makes sense for me to travel, and she will just start settling in there. I really hope this works out. I want to try my best with this girl.
Popsicle Posted March 22, 2015 Posted March 22, 2015 Why didn't you say, I love her like a fat kid loves cake? Or I like her like a fat kid likes cake?
Author Le Corb Posted March 23, 2015 Author Posted March 23, 2015 I have only just met her! It has been 2 days since I heard from her. What should I do?
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