Jimmyjackson Posted March 21, 2015 Posted March 21, 2015 I know this isn't exactly break up related, but you guys on this section seem to offer good explanations/advice. I was in a pub this evening and my friend who's friends with my ex brought up my ex, I said I didn't wanna know but she insisted. Anyway, she tells me that my ex dated a guy after me (which I knew anyway), but she has broken up with him because her best friend has feelings for her and she's confused. She said that she might have feelings for her too. This thread might seem pointless but it's just making me feel weird that my ex girlfriend is potentially bisexual or lesbian, I mean would anyone else feel weirded out by this? Not really a question per say but more a discussion, I have nothing against bisexual/lesbians but to think a woman I was with for 10 months and was intimate with, might be doing that with another girl seems strange to me, I wouldn't have seen it coming.
AIJ Posted March 21, 2015 Posted March 21, 2015 I think it would be quite hilarious and I'd probably not find it all that weird, in fact I think I'd be quite happy. Beats the imagery of another man being intimate with my ex, by a long, long way.
Author Jimmyjackson Posted March 21, 2015 Author Posted March 21, 2015 I think it would be quite hilarious and I'd probably not find it all that weird, in fact I think I'd be quite happy. Beats the imagery of another man being intimate with my ex, by a long, long way. I guess that's a good point haha. If I was the last person she had been with I'd be thinking, man, I turned her. I'm kinda glad I wasn't.
An0nymiss666 Posted March 21, 2015 Posted March 21, 2015 Some people just like both or turn out to be gay. Like you, I have no problem with same-sex relationships. But I would definitely feel weird if I found out that any of my ex-boyfriends might like guys. I think it's a normal feeling after being with someone for x amount of time and then later finding out they might not even like men/women to begin with...Kind of makes you question yourself a bit. Oh, minus my one ex. I think he might at least be bi-sexual based on certain things he used to say. The only weird thing is that he hasn't identified with that yet, to my knowledge. We don't speak, so I'll never know.
Author Jimmyjackson Posted March 21, 2015 Author Posted March 21, 2015 Some people just like both or turn out to be gay. Like you, I have no problem with same-sex relationships. But I would definitely feel weird if I found out that any of my ex-boyfriends might like guys. I think it's a normal feeling after being with someone for x amount of time and then later finding out they might not even like men/women to begin with...Kind of makes you question yourself a bit. Oh, minus my one ex. I think he might at least be bi-sexual based on certain things he used to say. The only weird thing is that he hasn't identified with that yet, to my knowledge. We don't speak, so I'll never know. Yeah exactly, I have no problem with it whatsoever, it just feels weird knowing an ex might be interested in their same sex. Maybe she's just confused and has emotional attachment to her friend, and not physical? I don't know, I'm just guessing I suppose.
An0nymiss666 Posted March 21, 2015 Posted March 21, 2015 Perhaps...admittedly I would also feel "confused" if I found out one of my girlfriends had a crush on me lol... Maybe she just doesn't know how to deal with that situation? Who knows
Author Jimmyjackson Posted March 21, 2015 Author Posted March 21, 2015 Perhaps...admittedly I would also feel "confused" if I found out one of my girlfriends had a crush on me lol... Maybe she just doesn't know how to deal with that situation? Who knows Yeah, I was thinking maybe she thinks she has feelings because she knows her friend does, if that makes sense haha? I think people can be emotionally attached to someone and confuse it for actually desiring them.
spiderowl Posted March 21, 2015 Posted March 21, 2015 I can understand your confusion about this as I'm sure anyone would feel the same way if they thought their ex partner was hetero like they were and it was suggested they might not be. However, she is your ex so put the past behind you and accept that things didn't work out. What concerns me more is that your friend insisted on foisting this information on you when you expressly told (him?) not to. What kind of friend would do that and why?
Author Jimmyjackson Posted March 21, 2015 Author Posted March 21, 2015 I can understand your confusion about this as I'm sure anyone would feel the same way if they thought their ex partner was hetero like they were and it was suggested they might not be. However, she is your ex so put the past behind you and accept that things didn't work out. What concerns me more is that your friend insisted on foisting this information on you when you expressly told (him?) not to. What kind of friend would do that and why? Well initially I did say I didn't wanna know but she said it made her feel weird as she's known her for years, so wanted to talk to someone about it.
mightycpa Posted March 21, 2015 Posted March 21, 2015 So, you and X are no longer an item. You went out with F, who told you that X went out with M, then broke up because W likes X and X might be interested in that Do I have that right? And you feel a little weird about it? I guess I would too, but not as weird as M must feel.
Author Jimmyjackson Posted March 21, 2015 Author Posted March 21, 2015 So, you and X are no longer an item. You went out with F, who told you that X went out with M, then broke up because W likes X and X might be interested in that Do I have that right? And you feel a little weird about it? I guess I would too, but not as weird as M must feel. Yeah basically. I know I thought to myself, what must the guy she was seeing be thinking, but then again she might not have told him the whole truth...who knows?
MLAZ1990 Posted March 21, 2015 Posted March 21, 2015 I would be very weirded out if I was in your situation OP!
erklat Posted March 21, 2015 Posted March 21, 2015 I would freak out. But in that part when someone insisted on talking about her.
OneBigIdgit Posted March 21, 2015 Posted March 21, 2015 I'd be a little surprised but when emotions are screwed up and hitting you non-stop, people go to extremes. Some people have a strange need to pile on the misery and go out of their way to yank peoples chains. The person who told you this obviously enjoyed yanking your chain. There was no need to bring up your ex, nor bring up the guy after you. If she had been sincerely needing to talk to someone about the 'possibility' that your ex might go either way, she should have just asked whether your ex ever displayed or mentioned such desires. It sounds more to me to gauge your reaction to see whether you were over the ex. Any of us who still encounter mutual friends and acquaintances have to build a tough shell to heal from being fresh out of a relationship. People sometimes like to go out of their way to bring up the situation to see how we react
Author Jimmyjackson Posted March 21, 2015 Author Posted March 21, 2015 I'd be a little surprised but when emotions are screwed up and hitting you non-stop, people go to extremes. Some people have a strange need to pile on the misery and go out of their way to yank peoples chains. The person who told you this obviously enjoyed yanking your chain. There was no need to bring up your ex, nor bring up the guy after you. If she had been sincerely needing to talk to someone about the 'possibility' that your ex might go either way, she should have just asked whether your ex ever displayed or mentioned such desires. It sounds more to me to gauge your reaction to see whether you were over the ex. Any of us who still encounter mutual friends and acquaintances have to build a tough shell to heal from being fresh out of a relationship. People sometimes like to go out of their way to bring up the situation to see how we react I agree there will have been a hidden agenda too. I reacted quite well I think, just said "really? wouldn't have seen that coming". Then I went back to work as I was working and my friend used to work with me was having some food where I work.
Author Jimmyjackson Posted April 7, 2015 Author Posted April 7, 2015 Okay so today I seen my ex with the girl I mentioned in this thread, holding hands and looking very couple like today in the local shopping complex. I managed to avoid eye contact and quickly left as soon as I could as I felt bothered by it. I don't know why this bothers me so much? the thought of her being with a guy doesn't in all honesty but the fact she's being intimate with a girl does for some reason. We broke up months ago now, why should this bother me?
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