Ryan Jay Posted March 20, 2015 Posted March 20, 2015 So my ex fiancee is home for spring break first time since breakup and I'm having a hard time not reaching out. Tbh I just really want to hangout one last time oh and give her back all the little items she's given me. Childish I know. What do I do?
darkbloom Posted March 20, 2015 Posted March 20, 2015 Then I would strongly advise against it. If she is the one doing the breaking then she is the one that needs to get into contact with you. Have a mutual friend drop off her stuff or mail it. The best thing to do for your healing is stay NC.
Author Ryan Jay Posted March 20, 2015 Author Posted March 20, 2015 Thanks for the reply. man I almost broke 21days of NC for something small.
Satu Posted March 20, 2015 Posted March 20, 2015 Thanks for the reply. man I almost broke 21days of NC for something small. Stay on target. 3
Author Ryan Jay Posted March 20, 2015 Author Posted March 20, 2015 @Satu I'm trying to stay on target it's just hard. 1
darkbloom Posted March 20, 2015 Posted March 20, 2015 This website will be invaluable to you then. I suggest perusing the forum breaks/breaking up and looking at all of the people that start their titles with 'So I broke NC'. Spoiler alert: None of them end well. It's like a nice b*tch-slap in the face without actually having to subject yourself to it. NC gets easier after 30 days. I promise. Besides, what would you say to her? And what would she say back that wouldn't make you feel worse? I am assuming you still want to get back together with her. If she wanted to get back together she would let you know. Anything else that comes out of her mouth is just going to hurt you. I hope you are not planning on running into her either while she is in town. 3
dumbass2 Posted March 20, 2015 Posted March 20, 2015 I can't stress enough about your ex being the one that needs to reach out to you and with something more than a bread crumb. I've been through this and I went 90 days NC before my ex reached out to me with a bread crumb. I can't tell you enough how bad it is to reply to one of those. I am happy that I was not the one to initiate contact, but I did miss her and reacted to it and I even though I was more indifferent, it was a mistake. Please stay NC and move forward. If she does contact you down the road with something substantial, then react how you see fit for your current situation. Hopefully you find someone else in that time span that will want you for who you are. 2
Satu Posted March 20, 2015 Posted March 20, 2015 @Satu I'm trying to stay on target it's just hard. I know. Its very hard, but you can do it. 2
Author Ryan Jay Posted March 21, 2015 Author Posted March 21, 2015 Update: I decided not to break NC, so today while I'm cleaning up my room I found a picture we took at chuckie cheese it sent me down memory lane and I started to tear up. Smh I feel like **** now.
AaronSG Posted March 21, 2015 Posted March 21, 2015 Update: I decided not to break NC, so today while I'm cleaning up my room I found a picture we took at chuckie cheese it sent me down memory lane and I started to tear up. Smh I feel like **** now. First off, I am very, very, very sorry that your going through this painful and confusing time in your life! Next, let's do one better than just cleaning your room, how about you go in the garage and look for a small to medium sized card board box. When you find one, either in the garage or behind the grocery store on your next trip out, let's then take that box and walk through your house, bedroom, den ect. ect. ect. and let's look for any remaining items that your ex might have forgotten or left behind at your home. Let's then take each item found and place it within that box! once your are sure that everything of her's is in the box, photo's of her any clothing, socks, jewelry, toiletries ect. ect. ect. just put it all in the box, once done, look for some good shipping or packing tape and seal that sucker up! Then you can either choose to store that box in a hard to reach place, or contact a common friend and perhaps have said friend transport the box to your ex! If a friend can't do it, it's only around $5.44 to mail a small flat rate box through the United States Post Office. How do I know that, I shipped many flat rates to my ex-fiancé after she moved out. I know finding things around the home that bring you back to times gone by is hard! Is sucked for me, my ex-fiancé left little over half that she owned behind at my place after the breakup! There I was, day number 2, on my hands and knees on what used to our bedroom floor picking up all her clothing left behind, t-shirts, skirts, socks, underwear, some shoes, pants, couple night dresses, bras..........every item filled with memory's, ever item filled with her energy, every item smelling and feeling like her...........tears flowed hard for the couple days it took me to rid the home of just her clothing alone. But I'm here talking to you now, I lived through it, haven't bumped into anything owned or related to my ex-fiancé within my home for little over 6 months out of the 7.5 months that she's been gone. You'll be fine, keep staying "no contact" and keep posting your feelings and thoughts right here on LoveShack! Good luck! 1
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