HeadinHeart Posted March 18, 2015 Posted March 18, 2015 We dated for over a year and 3 months. We broke up in November, so it's been a couple months and I'm okay. I spent months wallowing and upset, but I'm better now, just the feeling that I miss her alot. She dated a guy after, which is none of my business but it didn't last more than 2 months. She confessed to a mutual friend, that she loved me greatly, and to get over her attachment to me..she slept with guys. I would never judge her, but it still hurts to know. Before I dated her I was in a very emotionally abusive relationship with a girl I'd known for years, after I broke up with her she continued to torture me with things for up to a year after the breakup. I was 19-20 years old when she did this, and it eventually stopped after I got others involved, and she literally cannot do anything to me now. During my time with the abusive ex, she always wanted me to do things for her, but anything I did was never enough. I feel as if it still affects me to this day. Than I met my most recent ex, and she was fantastic. We are both avid users of tumblr, a blogging website. I started to get anon messages, and I thought they were her. So I got a tracker added to my blog, it just tells me the city and time they looked at my blog. Every single day she looks at it, yesterday 5 times and even 12am this morning. On Saturday she accidentally followed me, than immediately unfollowed me. I still got the notification, and now I knew her tumblr. She deleted her tumblr right after, saying she had been found and harassed again. I never said anything, didnt even look at her blog. I don't understand why she looks at my things, when she told me to "F off" multiple times, and called me names I don't want to repeat on here. Even told people I harassed her, my family harassed her. My brothers wife was good friends with her, and we double dated alot, and she messaged her ONCE asking her if everything was alright. I'm trying hard not to read into it, cause I know she is dating another guy now for almost a month. I got on pinterest for the first time in months last week, and surprisingly still follow her. Her and the new guy have a album together full of pictures, and its named. "*her name * his name with his last name*" like they are married, and its full of marriage pictures and ideas. this is more of a rant, cause I don't have anyone to talk to about this. Thanks
ZiggyZoo Posted March 20, 2015 Posted March 20, 2015 I'm sorry you're going through this. I'm about on the same timeline as you (I got dumped in early December) and am really missing my ex too. Not wanting to get back together at all really, just missing the hell out of him. One thing that I did which really helped was to get very strict about not checking up on him online AT ALL. Even being more or less indifferent, it still affects you to see what your ex is up to. I know I really noticed an improvement in my overall happiness when I truly went NC and stopped snooping. Just a thought...
xinaxxsdertf Posted March 20, 2015 Posted March 20, 2015 yeah i made a strict rule with my NC that as soon as i start NC, i have to stop looking at her social media too otherwise thats breaking NC. you have to learn to stop looking at what shes doing or if shes checking up on you. Sounds like she might be just checking to see if you have moved on aswell maybe? she might feel guilty for leaving you and is hoping you are okay (as a friend). she has a new man now so really you need to just completely ignore her now. you may miss her, but even if you met up with her, can you imagine thinking about all the guys shes been in bed with now? block her off everything, delete her number, unfriend her blah blah blah do everything you can to make her disappear from your life. its hard to move on, but its even harder when theres constant reminders of her everywhere. if you make her completely vanish from your life then nothing can hold you back, she will only be a memory that you will never see or hear from again
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