wanderer76 Posted March 18, 2015 Posted March 18, 2015 Right - I expect to get a load of grief as a result of starting this thread as what I am thinking of doing is not nice but I want to make things happen and get really impatient. I've been seeing someone from work for the last 8 months - spending the night together a couple of times a week and having a great time. She has a long term partner and they have been having trouble for a long time. She also has children but not by him. We have talked about the future and said that we want to be together. She has told her family about us and her hopes for the future and her children know having seen texts in which she tells me she loves me. Her family say that for the sake of the children she should work at the relationship - they want security - but I am in a financial position to ensure that they stay in the same house and have the security. She tried to break up with her partner last week and after getting very angry he then started doing the whole 'let's work at this' stuff. He doesn't know about us but given that her family do then it is a timebomb waiting to go off. She has now had a difficult week with her daughter and feels that she needs to focus on making her life OK for a while - still wants to speak to me and spend time with me but not progress things between the two of us for a while. She was in tears explaining this to me and saying that she loves me etc. My horrid side wants to drop her partner an anonymous text telling him about us in the hope that he will call it a day. I know part of her difficulty with breaking up with him is the idea of making him upset and she would prefer it if he made the decision rather than her. But these things can backfire and I know that meddling often goes wrong. I also know that the majority of men leave a relationship if they are cheated on so the chances of him going are probably pretty high if I do what I'm thinking of doing. I'm so confused. I'm rubbish at waiting for things to happen and prefer to take the lead...but might this be a step too far. Any advice??
d0nnivain Posted March 18, 2015 Posted March 18, 2015 Every day that she doesn't break it off with him, she is choosing him over you. Still think you are all that to her? Even though this affects you too if you meddle, she will probably end up angry at you.
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