Mjm1014 Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 If you dated someone "not official" for two to three months and they tell you things are moving too fast, just want to have fun and see where things go, and can't promise things will go anywhere, but can't promise they won't either..what would you do? She's still making plans with me, and texting me 24/7..I just don't feel she's that into me thogh. I don't want her to string me along. This all came up when I asked her over to meet my parents. Opinions please! What would you do? I like her and want to pursue her because I like her but part of me feels like a fool- if she truly was into me why make excuses, right?
Vintage79 Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 If you dated someone "not official" for two to three months and they tell you things are moving too fast, just want to have fun and see where things go, and can't promise things will go anywhere, but can't promise they won't either..what would you do? She's still making plans with me, and texting me 24/7..I just don't feel she's that into me thogh. I don't want her to string me along. This all came up when I asked her over to meet my parents. Opinions please! What would you do? I like her and want to pursue her because I like her but part of me feels like a fool- if she truly was into me why make excuses, right? It's seems like you're the one making excuses - she makes plans with you and stays in contact - she's very interested. If she's doing everything a typical girl would do with you have 2-3 months -making out, sex, etc., I don't see the issue with her. She's being honest with you, still trying to actively date you, etc...she just needs more time before she wants to be integrated into your life. It's only been 2 months...give her a break. Summary - this is a problem with you more than with her.
Author Mjm1014 Posted March 17, 2015 Author Posted March 17, 2015 Thing is we are 28, no sex, blew me off on a date to get her nails done...I only am home once or twice a week because I'm a pilot and living in a different city, and she doesn't say anything to make me think she likes me...it's like we talk as "friends"...sure we hold hands and kiss when we are out but if I tell her anything like I miss her she gets mad and says it makes her uncomfortable. Guess I left all they out lol sorry
Versacehottie Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 is meeting your family her main hesitation? If so, I wouldn't worry too much. But from what you said, I get the feeling, it's more than just that. The wording on your current status is not encouraging if indeed that's how she phrased it. Any other signs? Or are you just anxious and overthinking it? I think it's fine if she doesn't want to meet your family until you figure out what you are to each other. But her "going-slow" wording was so non-chalant and lackluster that I think you may have a point, in which case I would not be too encouraged to keep moving forward on your end.
Gary S Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 (edited) The woman is right. Wait six months before meeting friends and family. Edit: I just read your second post... she gets mad when you say something romantic and breaks dates? - She's a user, I'm sorry, but she does not love you, and probably never will. Edited March 17, 2015 by Gary S
Versacehottie Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 oh yeah, if this is the girl that blew you off to get her nails done, she is not a keeper (and not into you since that is what you are wondering).
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 The woman is right. Wait six months before meeting friends and family. Edit: I just read your second post... she gets mad when you say something romantic and breaks dates? - She's a user, I'm sorry, but she does not love you, and probably never will. ...Six months?? really? Seems a bit excessive. I could see maybe 3 months. Honestly OP she doesn't sound crazy about you if shes blowing you off to get her nails done. Maybe dump her and find someone else?
TunaCat Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 I am not romantic at all, but my boyfriend is. I struggle with how uncomfortable I am with romantic words and gestures. She could just not be comfortable with romantic words/gestures. Your girlfriend reminds me of how I am. It's not a bad thing to want to take things slowly. Yet, if that's not what you want, you need to talk to her.
devilish innocent Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 I'd stop seeing her. It's unlikely things are heading anywhere as she'd know by now. You're right. She is just stringing you along.
FortunateSon Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 After 2-3 months I would expect for things to be a bit more "solidified"? Sounds like you could just be an option at this point, you might want to talked to her and see if you are both really on the same page?
rester Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 If you dated someone "not official" for two to three months and they tell you things are moving too fast, just want to have fun and see where things go, and can't promise things will go anywhere, but can't promise they won't either..what would you do? She's still making plans with me, and texting me 24/7..I just don't feel she's that into me thogh. I don't want her to string me along. This all came up when I asked her over to meet my parents. Opinions please! What would you do? I like her and want to pursue her because I like her but part of me feels like a fool- if she truly was into me why make excuses, right? In my experience, these are signs that she does not see this relationship going anywhere long-term, but she likes you enough at the moment. I'd suggest keeping your options open and not letting yourself get too attached to her. In your other thread you said she told you she's not looking for a relationship. Believe her. Definitely don't push for her to meet your parents or anything relationship-like. Enjoy her company when you have the time, but don't let yourself fall for her and don't go out of your way to make time for her because she's not doing the same for you. If you want something serious you should probably move on. Also, in the future I'd hold off on the meeting the parents thing for much longer. It can scare off a lot of people. Wait at least until you know you are both on the same page about the status of your relationship.
Author Mjm1014 Posted March 17, 2015 Author Posted March 17, 2015 Thanks for the replies everyone. This is extremely frustrating because she blows up my phone with texts all day which makes me think she's into me, and says she's excited to see me next week when I'm home, but still feel like I'm just someone to talk to at the moment. You can tell when someone acts into you, and Im not feeling it at all from here...maybe her guard is up, maybe not...so I may just cut my loses and find someone worth my time. After I posted last night I asked if I could give her a call (she hates talking on the phone and we've talked on the phone twice in 3 months), and she made more excuses and says she prefers to just text right now. Next. Thanks everyone. 1
Hopeful30 Posted March 17, 2015 Posted March 17, 2015 I would assume they're not that interested in me, or at least not enough to make things official. I would think they are waiting for something better to come along. 2
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