amarqes Posted March 16, 2015 Posted March 16, 2015 Hi everyone. I need help! My long distance boyfriend (19, and I’m 21) (first boyfriend - for 1 year, we lost our virginities to each other) just broke up with me. I noticed he’s been distant (the "I love you"'s decreased and texted less and less (sometimes he didn’t text back…) and worst, he was canceling our visits, always with excuses. I thought he was depressed because he’s having a lot of work and also his parent bought a new house and he doesn’t like it because it is far from his work so he takes longer to get there. Our relationship was very good! The only problem was about facebook. He has a LOT of female friends there and they are always after him. We had “in a relationship” but he refused to link his profile to mine. This was the main cause of our fights. He was hiding our relationship from everyone and it hurt me so bad! (and he didn’t let me post anything on his profile either). A week ago a girl write on his profile that she loved him and posted a love song (second girl that does this in 1 month!). He deleted her and the posts and I thought everything was ok. The next day I asked him AGAIN to put my name on his profile so everyone know I’m his girlfriend. He stopped talking to me. For 4 days we didn’t talk. On the 4 day I texted him and he said he needed time to think about us and that I didn't trust him and I was suffocating him (I admit that sometimes I was a little needy but only because he ignored me and seemed he didn't loved me anymore. I regret it...). I said ok, let’s have some time to think. 2 days after this he changed his status to single! Yes! He broke up with me this way! Who in hell does that, right? I texted him that he was a coward and to forget me. No replay. 2 days after that I feel the need of closure and wanted to say goodbye so I texted him again that I love him but I accept his decision and said goodbye. He replay immediately saying that his feeling aren’t as strong as in the beginning (and he doesn’t know why) but he still wants to be friends with me and perhaps in the future he will love me again. This isn’t the 1 time he does this exact same thing (the last time we were apart 2 months and I found out he was seeing other girls during that time) so I knew what to say and answered: “Thank you for your honesty. I’m sorry I couldn’t make you happy. You made me very happy, I didn’t know I could be that happy. Sorry, but we can’t be friend right now because I love you. Maybe someday when my feelings aren’t this strong… perhaps when I found someone else… You are the best person I know and I’m happy I meet you and had his love story with you. Hope you find your girl and you two love each other as much as I love you. Be happy my love because that’s the more important thing in the world, to love and be loved! kisses and talk to you some day in the future, LOVE YOU <3” My question is, will he regret it (like he did the last 2 times)? I miss him so much, he is my best friend and I thought he was the one. I wanted to marry him and have his children (he wanted it too!) He sounds so confused… Is this a case of grass is greener syndrome? He never had the college experience.. I’m doing the NO CONTACT RULE to heal and to make him miss me… Hope this isn’t very confusing to you (and I’m sorry for my English, it’s not my 1 language)… Help me please! Is he coming back?
Karin2rinkashi Posted March 16, 2015 Posted March 16, 2015 If there was no apparent reason and if you asked him he just said that "I just fell out of love" or some stupidity like that, if you think of what you did wrong, and you can't really point it out. Then it is a good possibility that it is GIGS. Though, he may or may not come back. That depends on how are the pastures that he explores. The point being, if there was no issues between you too recently (arguing, fighting, cheating) then it is GIGS. He has done that 2wice before and every time you were his safety net and you took him back. You need to stop that! You need to tell him to **** off and live your life. If he comes back then play it cold, but don't cling to hope of him coming back... Do yourself a favor, ask yourself this question..... Do you want to be someone's second choice, over and over and over again? Really....? DO you? Dump him! Let him learn his lesson. Don't take him back for at least 6 months....
mightycpa Posted March 16, 2015 Posted March 16, 2015 I don't know if any of your friends have told you this, but people actually do fall out of love, and pretty quickly too. This happens a lot at your age. Once they are out of love, they pretty much don't care any more. They might like you ok, but that's as far as it goes. There's no sentimentality about it.
stillafool Posted March 16, 2015 Posted March 16, 2015 Your ex bf being 22 and is obviously hot with all these girls chasing him is going to enjoy the attention for a while before he settles down again. Spring is upon us and you know what they say about a young mans fancy when the sap rises. Anywho, you are young too and I would try to get over him if I were you. You have alot of fun ahead of you. Try not to spend too much time on this heartbreak.
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