Any other women have extreme difficulty finding men they're attracted to?

March 17, 2015

Alpha is not all about looks it is about dominance, control and power.

As Hopeful30 says good looks, gym membership and a good job may not give you Alpha status.

I once knew two guys who were friends.

One was tall, very good looking, excellent all rounder at sport, nice guy, well read, great job. Shy, though not painfully so, sociable but merged into the background. NOT an Alpha.

His friend, short, on the chubby side, hopeless at sport though competitive to his last breath, well read, great job.

Exuded power, charming, dominant though not usually in a nasty way. All eyes were naturally on him when he entered the room. Alpha through and through.

March 17, 2015

Ha ha! I saw one last week. Couldn't say it was butterflies, no actually definately not, just a nice face. Too young to bother with but everyone of my friends also concurred, particularly good features. He kind of sheepishly laughed as he passed so he was onto me and my ogling eye....but hey! You get your jollies wherever these days.

I've recently lost a heap of weight but my confidence in my skin isn't the best these days. Losing the clarity of it, now have pigmentation showing through, so I just don't think I rank as attractive anymore. But actually that aspect tends to make me more bold in my outward interest as I've essentially removed the possibility of any entanglement in my mind. Now I can perve to my hearts content knowing it's just a bit of fun in the moment.

I really have quit perving, but it's like how victims attract their abuser; I attract guys who want to be perved on.

March 17, 2015

As a guy this thread absolutely depresses me.

I can read so much bs from some women here.

Pheromones? Smell?

Its about looks and status.

March 17, 2015

I really can't convey just how much I adore you!

Its enough to make you cry sometimes when you suddenly realise that you are still the rampant teenager of days gone by...

I don't think about it either day to day but when I am with someone I am really into its like I have a rocket in my knickers! I can't get enough! I wear them out!

Celebs are pretty but they don't really do it for me. For me its like looking at a cute dog or cat picture. But once in a while you meet that guy that just has "it" and you don't know whether to bite them, snog them, sniff them or just ride them like sea biscuit... Oh decisions decisions decisions...

Heres hoping the next date is one of those...

Here's hoping!

March 17, 2015

It's not necessarily that they don't meet our selection criteria. It's that we aren't always attracted to them. That's a physiological thing that none of us can change. You can't help who you are attracted to (or not attracted to.)
I can't even count how many times I've had girlfriends say, "Why am I not attracted to him? He's PERFECT for me! He has everything I want in a man." Women are as frustrated with this as men are.
And I read an interesting article about sexuality the other day. Basically it says that there are certain men who women would want to get pregnant from (their genes) but not necessarily want to raise their babies with. And it's a valid thing but not accepted in our society, because I can totally relate. Some men I wouldn't mind have babies with, but others I would prefer to raise them because they are more stable father figures, more trustworthy etc. It's unfair, but I can relate.
Maybe that's why it's so hard to find the whole package.

Ugh... fatalists. Look, PART of this is genetic... The rest of this is up to you. You CAN choose what is attractive to you. In fact you have probably already changed this several times in your life without even knowing it.

You have to understand that we as humans are not designed for million people cities, but instead for tiny tribes where you get to pick from 5 different guys.. not 500,000. So, your attraction mechanisms are plastic and mold-able by design.

Genetic fatalism and pheremones are just buzzwords ignorant people use to justify their own intellectual laziness. Women who believe this stuff is just fate are dumb and probably think their horoscopes also determine their lives.

March 17, 2015

10% of males is still millions. Hundreds in most cities.

So many single males and females are lethargic...talk about being unable to find a good partner but then put little effort into the process.

I'm the word's worse golfer...I wasn't on the driving range yesterday evening...don't take lessons. Gee whiz...I wish I was as good as some golfers...duh.

Can't get a great guy? Did you to to dance lessons yesterday....no. Join
EHarmony or Match...no ...if on them, add better photos...no. Go to a Meet group with lots of smart, fit guys (coed sports, science, etc)...no. Put on a dress, heels when you went grocery shopping...no. Volunteer at a charity...no. Join a political party...no. There are about 15 or so Meet Up hikes in our area this weekend...many wonderful people... Will you go to he ones in your city?...no

For decades people ask 'how to meet people'. Then do next to nothing to actually meet some one. Last evening at our dance lesson, there were 3 more males than females...what a great opportunity for some single woman to get to know one of them...but nope, some single woman is at home wondering why she can't meet a great guy.

It's because women expect men to do all the chasing. However, they don't want to be approached by just any guy, but a guy who meets their stringent criteria and the onus is on the men to know whether or not they meet her standards. I mean reading a woman's body language should be so simple right? Many men today are discouraged from approaching women because they don't want to be labeled as a creeper.

March 17, 2015

As a guy this thread absolutely depresses me.

I can read so much bs from some women here.
Pheromones? Smell?

Its about looks and status.

indeed SFM

March 17, 2015

indeed SFM

If you're not super hot to them...then they will use you for whatever purpose.

Read this...classic example.

The Real Pussy Pass for Shoveling Snow, or Tinder Girl Gets Chumps to Dig Out Her Car : TheRedPill

March 17, 2015

For me, a committed relationship, marriage etc. is an OPTIONAL part of life. So there is no need to settle for anyone.

I dont have a list of standards, I'm a perfectionist but not in terms of dating. All i look for is someone i am interested in and attracted to. I make no apology to bitter men on the Internet who automatically assume that makes me fussy and that I should screw every man i see. Just because he has a penis.

March 17, 2015

Can't get a great guy? Did you to to dance lessons yesterday....no. Join
EHarmony or Match...no ...if on them, add better photos...no. Go to a Meet group with lots of smart, fit guys (coed sports, science, etc)...no. Put on a dress, heels when you went grocery shopping...no. Volunteer at a charity...no. Join a political party...no. There are about 15 or so Meet Up hikes in our area this weekend...many wonderful people... Will you go to he ones in your city?...no

For decades people ask 'how to meet people'. Then do next to nothing to actually meet some one. Last evening at our dance lesson, there were 3 more males than females...what a great opportunity for some single woman to get to know one of them...but nope, some single woman is at home wondering why she can't meet a great guy.

HUGE generalization. This post says more about you than the women posting here. You're assuming all women complain and are lazy about looking for a partner.

Ugh... fatalists. Look, PART of this is genetic... The rest of this is up to you. You CAN choose what is attractive to you. In fact you have probably already changed this several times in your life without even knowing it.

You have to understand that we as humans are not designed for million people cities, but instead for tiny tribes where you get to pick from 5 different guys.. not 500,000. So, your attraction mechanisms are plastic and mold-able by design.

Genetic fatalism and pheremones are just buzzwords ignorant people use to justify their own intellectual laziness. Women who believe this stuff is just fate are dumb and probably think their horoscopes also determine their lives.

Tell that to a closet homosexual who can't control being attracted to the same sex. You CANNOT control who you were attracted to. If we could, none of us would be on this forum and the world would be a MUCH easier place.

It's because women expect men to do all the chasing. However, they don't want to be approached by just any guy, but a guy who meets their stringent criteria and the onus is on the men to know whether or not they meet her standards. I mean reading a woman's body language should be so simple right? Many men today are discouraged from approaching women because they don't want to be labeled as a creeper.

Again, not always true. I don't get approached often, but even when I get approached by a man I don't like, it's a huge compliment and I always have smile on my face. "That's very kind of you .. [excuse]...but thank you!"

Edited March 17, 2015 by Hopeful30

March 17, 2015

Tell that to a closet homosexual who can't control being attracted to the same sex. You CANNOT control who you were attracted to. If we could, none of us would be on this forum and the world would be a MUCH easier place.

We are not talking about you going Lesbian. We are talking about altering what kind of traits you are attracted to in a man.

IF this were genetically hardwired then you would be chasing the same guys you were chasing at age 14. Unless of course you think your DNA has changed between then and now. As we age, we grow, learn, mature, and our attractions change!

You do know that in Ancient Greece nearly 100% of the male population was actively bisexual? Do you think this was genetically hardwired? Do you think men are genetically attracted to stick skinny, emaciated women who look like the walking dead?

I challenge you to think about yourself over time and what kind of changes you have had in the type of men that attract you. I'm sure many things are the same, but some are different.

Edited March 17, 2015 by SawtoothMars

March 17, 2015

Women are generally attracted to what they believe will Benefit how others will view them.

Status and top looks are one of those things.

March 17, 2015

Nearly every woman wants a "social guy". That's why socially awkward guys don't do well. Even women who want strong silent types also desire him to be good in social situations.

I don't know about other women, but this is true of me and one of my close friends (who I talk to a lot about this stuff). We have both had boyfriends recently who we were very attracted to for reasons like: educated, good-looking, good in bed, tall, etc. But we both said the one thing we didn't like about them is that they were kind of timid in social situations. Not like total geeks or anything; I wouldn't date a guy who was downright "embarrassing" in social situations. Just timid.

My ex of five years (2005 to 2010) was someone I was in love with. But I hated that when we were in groups of people and he was the one talking, he'd sometimes talk at such a low volume that I know that NO ONE could hear him. It wasn't even shyness; even around his own good friends who totally accept him, he'd be overly soft-spoken. My more recent ex (2012 to 2014) was similarly timid but in a different way, even though he too was good-looking, educated, tall, articulate, and I was proud to be with him.

This is why I keep harping on how this "alpha male" (I know the term is annoying, but I can't help using it)...anyway, this "alpha male" that I like now....why I think he's so much more attractive. He's tall, educated, good-looking, funny, AND he's social and charismatic. A woman will be more proud to be with a man if he is impressive/dynamic to others; she will respect him more herself too because social confidence tends to garner respect from others.

I was REALLY proud to be with those other two guys I was with; I just wanted them to be more dynamic socially to magnify all the great things about them.

March 17, 2015

Women are generally attracted to what they believe will Benefit how others will view them.

Status and top looks are one of those things.

And men aren't attracted to what they believe will Benefit how others will view them?

Of course they are, because that is how the world works.

Better job, larger house, bigger car, trophy wife, then a younger slimmer model...

How many men of 30+ are coming on here wanting to date hot 20-25 year olds or beautiful women 10 years younger than they are? How many men turn their noses up at older, fatter or perceived lesser beings too. Speak about personality and they have no concept of what that as to do with finding a mate. How many men say that men are visually driven and that they cannot contemplate being with anything less than a "hot" woman.

Do they have a special connection with those younger pretty women, or do they just believe it will Benefit how others will view them????

Everyone wants to be seen with good looking people or at least average looking people, because it elevates them and feeds egos.

If we are seen out with a person who looks like they just crawled out of a bog, then we need a first class reason for that, else we will be downgraded in the eyes of the world too.

Men are no different from women, everyone wants the "best" they can achieve, to suggest otherwise is disingenuous.

March 17, 2015

We are not talking about you going Lesbian. We are talking about altering what kind of traits you are attracted to in a man.

IF this were genetically hardwired then you would be chasing the same guys you were chasing at age 14. Unless of course you think your DNA has changed between then and now. As we age, we grow, learn, mature, and our attractions change!

You do know that in Ancient Greece nearly 100% of the male population was actively bisexual? Do you think this was genetically hardwired? Do you think men are genetically attracted to stick skinny, emaciated women who look like the walking dead?

I challenge you to think about yourself over time and what kind of changes you have had in the type of men that attract you. I'm sure many things are the same, but some are different.

I understand that, but I can't help if my genitals throb for some men and not for others. I don't think I'm wrong in wanting a man who can make me all hot and bothered as well.

March 17, 2015

It is looks money status and this is depressing

Edited March 17, 2015 by Mangina

March 17, 2015

Alpha is not all about looks it is about dominance, control and power.
As Hopeful30 says good looks, gym membership and a good job may not give you Alpha status.

I once knew two guys who were friends.
One was tall, very good looking, excellent all rounder at sport, nice guy, well read, great job. Shy, though not painfully so, sociable but merged into the background. NOT an Alpha.

His friend, short, on the chubby side, hopeless at sport though competitive to his last breath, well read, great job.
Exuded power, charming, dominant though not usually in a nasty way. All eyes were naturally on him when he entered the room. Alpha through and through.

I never once mentioned alpha is exclusively about looks. It's about the mindset and dominance they have over women.

March 17, 2015

I thought this thread was about finding men who like frog legs and open doors for women, not looks and money.

March 17, 2015

I never once mentioned alpha is exclusively about looks. It's about the mindset and dominance they have over women.

I don't think it's so much about dominance over other women as it is dominance over other men.

March 17, 2015

I thought this thread was about finding men who like frog legs and open doors for women, not looks and money.

You must have missed the last few pages. She is looking for someone to make her genitalia swell up = looks. eat escargo = class = money and is the perfect gentleman

March 17, 2015

And men aren't attracted to what they believe will Benefit how others will view them?
Of course they are, because that is how the world works.
Better job, larger house, bigger car, trophy wife, then a younger slimmer model...
How many men of 30+ are coming on here wanting to date hot 20-25 year olds or beautiful women 10 years younger than they are? How many men turn their noses up at older, fatter or perceived lesser beings too. Speak about personality and they have no concept of what that as to do with finding a mate. How many men say that men are visually driven and that they cannot contemplate being with anything less than a "hot" woman.
Do they have a special connection with those younger pretty women, or do they just believe it will Benefit how others will view them????

Everyone wants to be seen with good looking people or at least average looking people, because it elevates them and feeds egos.
If we are seen out with a person who looks like they just crawled out of a bog, then we need a first class reason for that, else we will be downgraded in the eyes of the world too.

Men are no different from women, everyone wants the "best" they can achieve, to suggest otherwise is disingenuous.

Men are 85% driven by looks. Personality and compatibility are the icing on the cake. Higher testosterone and a different hormone profile explains this. Women are hypergamous- they want the best looks, status, power, charisma (aka game) that their looks will afford them. If at any point they think they can trade up, they will.

The numerous comments by women on here confirm everything I have read in the Red Pill. Sharing the alpha, the feeling of entitlement, hypergamy etc has been extensively explained over at redpill forum, rational male etc... The sad part is? The deep down beta romantic in me wanted it to be all lies, that women can be 'special snowflakes' who can resist their hypergamous urges. Then I come on here and read some of these replies.... God it's depressing. But so accurately depicted by the Red Pill.

March 17, 2015

I don't think it's so much about dominance over other women as it is dominance over other men.

which goes back to the perceived alpha image

OP views European men as alpha because the ones shes seen or encountered are not only good looking, but traditional as well.

In short, she wants a good looking, possibly modelesque man with a British or German accent to buy her things, cater to her every whim, and like her and only her.

To her, they beat out all others. As if eglilaterianism is so terrible.

The problem with OP's clear preference is

1. She lives in America, not Europe.

2. Her preference is a blanket statement so we dont get a true clear preference other than American men suck to her.

3. She doesnt seem to realize that guys like that have options.

I kinda want to see a picture of OP to see if she has the looks to pull guys who can clearly choose from the high options.

Leagues exist, but it seems that men are more aware of that than women. And to the person that said that men will get with what benefits them as well.

I rarely see a man turn down a big woman if she has a great personality. But Ive seen way too many women turn down a short guy even if the rest of his life was together.

Youll find most men will agree with me on that sentiment, and it is for that reason that Red Pill/Men Going Their Own Way tactics are being implement.

I cant really help you with your man problem, OP though. The Inuits are generally around short guys all the time, doesnt seem to bother them. Generally, a womans taste is both cultural and genetic...but its almost mostly cultural and societal, whether from a familial level or based off their own surroundings.

March 17, 2015

I don't think it's so much about dominance over other women as it is dominance over other men.

Really?

Fifty shades of Grey has sold 100 million copies and was one of the fastest opening films of all time.

The story? Woman falls for a strong, handsome, confident, rich and DOMINANT alpha who wants to control her.

And you're saying that this isn't a fantasy that women subscribe too lol? The facts and figures speak for themselves. 100 million women can't be wrong, can they?

March 17, 2015

Men are 85% driven by looks. Personality and compatibility are the icing on the cake. Higher testosterone and a different hormone profile explains this. Women are hypergamous- they want the best looks, status, power, charisma (aka game) that their looks will afford them. If at any point they think they can trade up, they will.

The numerous comments by women on here confirm everything I have read in the Red Pill. Sharing the alpha, the feeling of entitlement, hypergamy etc has been extensively explained over at redpill forum, rational male etc... The sad part is? The deep down beta romantic in me wanted it to be all lies, that women can be 'special snowflakes' who can resist their hypergamous urges. Then I come on here and read some of these replies.... God it's depressing. But so accurately depicted by the Red Pill.

Me too this is so depressing.

And

You forgot the part about having kids with on man and raising them with another.

March 17, 2015

Men are 85% driven by looks. Personality and compatibility are the icing on the cake. Higher testosterone and a different hormone profile explains this. Women are hypergamous- they want the best looks, status, power, charisma (aka game) that their looks will afford them. If at any point they think they can trade up, they will.

The numerous comments by women on here confirm everything I have read in the Red Pill. Sharing the alpha, the feeling of entitlement, hypergamy etc has been extensively explained over at redpill forum, rational male etc... The sad part is? The deep down beta romantic in me wanted it to be all lies, that women can be 'special snowflakes' who can resist their hypergamous urges. Then I come on here and read some of these replies.... God it's depressing. But so accurately depicted by the Red Pill.

read my latest comment. I was just like you, still am in some respects. Now I find i have to unlearn everything I was ever taught.

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