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What should dating be like after 1-2 months? How to continue elevating interest

Vixen32

By Vixen32
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Vixen32 Member

Vixen32

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I've been dating a girl for about 1.5 months and things seem to be generally good, but I wanted to get some opinions on what dating in the 1-2 month is typically like. What I can tell you is that we met online and saw each other about once a week for the first 3 weeks, and 2-3 times/week for the past 2-3 weeks(say 10 times in total). We're both mid-30s. We slept with each other on date 4, although no sex, or even really any making out (didn't even kiss her until date 3). Since then kissing and making out has escalated, we've slept together 3 other times and have had sex twice, she's super cuddly when sleeping with me, and is generally very responsive to communication (occasionally something slips through the cracks, but it's rare), and she usually asks when we'll see each other next at the end of the date, she initiates some contact - but it's usually a back and forth...it doesn't really seem lopsided, she doesn't do a lot planning or paying (althougn paying isn't an issue though, as I make a lot more than her). I occasionally check my online profile, some times she's recently been on, other times not (i.e. not logged in for days)...I really don't know if she's trying to see other people, or just seeing if I've logged in.

 

I have a few questions - I'd love your view on whatever you can comment on - keep in mind that we've been dating for 5-6 weeks.

 

1. How frequently should we be seeing each other? Jow many times/week?

2. On days when we don't see each other should we be talking and/texting, or silent?

3. Should we be exclusive, or have talked about it? If not exclusive, when should we talk about that?

4. She seems interested, but any tips on how to maintain and increase her interest level would be awesome

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
Posted

What you are doing seems fine. Just keep doing it.

 

1. How frequently should we be seeing each other? Jow many times/week?
As often as you want that is convenient for both of you but not everyday.

 

2. On days when we don't see each other should we be talking and/texting, or silent?
If you want to. Personally at 2 months I rarely want daily contact but most people want more contact then I do.

 

3. Should we be exclusive, or have talked about it? If not exclusive, when should we talk about that?
It's entirely up to you. When it feels right talk about it. Until you talk about it, assume you are not.

 

4. She seems interested, but any tips on how to maintain and increase her interest level would be awesome
Be interesting. Have something to say when you meet.
smackie9 Established Member

smackie9

Posted
Posted

Every relationship is different, everyones expectations are different, personalities are different, everyone has a different pace. There is no how much is how much. If you feel things should be progressing more intensely, you either A, discuss it with her, or B, stop seeing her and find someone who has equal expectations, and on the same page.

 

I have been in your shoes, and from my personal experience when it wasn't progressing to the intensity I was hoping for, it meant that we weren't that into each other, and the chemistry wasn't there. It's not worth it to force things to happen. I was more satisfied finding someone who felt right, and there was no question how we felt for each other.

fitnessfan365 Established Member

fitnessfan365

Posted
Posted

Everyone is different and there is not really a set formula. So I can only comment on what I'm used to.

 

- First three weeks is usually once a week. Then as she gets more interested, and reaches out more, I plan more dates. However, I value my independence, so even when I'm in a relationship I like a woman that is cool with 2-3x a week on her own seeing her friends/family, doing her own hobbies, etc..

 

- Daily communication isn't necessary IMO. If you have a date planned, talk to her then. If she reaches out with a sweet text don't ignore it. Respond with "Your text made me smile! Will show my appreciation tmrw night." Then say you have to run.

 

- ALWAYS let the woman bring up being exclusive. If she isn't talking about it, keep things as is.

 

- What you're doing seems to be working so don't over think it and keep it up.

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Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Established Member

Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646

Posted
Posted
Everyone is different and there is not really a set formula. So I can only comment on what I'm used to.

 

- First three weeks is usually once a week. Then as she gets more interested, and reaches out more, I plan more dates. However, I value my independence, so even when I'm in a relationship I like a woman that is cool with 2-3x a week on her own seeing her friends/family, doing her own hobbies, etc..

 

- Daily communication isn't necessary IMO. If you have a date planned, talk to her then. If she reaches out with a sweet text don't ignore it. Respond with "Your text made me smile! Will show my appreciation tmrw night." Then say you have to run.

 

- ALWAYS let the woman bring up being exclusive. If she isn't talking about it, keep things as is.

 

- What you're doing seems to be working so don't over think it and keep it up.

 

I like your text suggestion, gonna use that sometime ^_~

  • Like 1
Gary S Established Member

Gary S

Posted
Posted

A couple of tips:

 

- cut down on the texts. texting is the worst form of communication for dating. Instead, call between dates, or just call to make dates - this is something you'll have to work out between yourselves - clue- try to read her, like a poker player, use your intuition/gut feelings - always, always, always, throughout dating and relationships.

 

- You should have at least one date a week. More than that ideally, seems like you you are already doing that, sounds good... work it out between the two of you.

 

- forget about commitment talk, unless she brings it up - commitment between sane people who care about each other is natural. People vote with their feet.

 

- Keep in mind that it takes 2 months to have a real foundation for a relationship. Why? - because that's how long it takes to fall in love, if things are going just right - and it sounds like things are, good for you!

 

- how to keep interest level? - after two months, spend the money, buy her gifts once in awhile, have a date night every week for forever. To stay in love, women need four things - trust, respect, romance, and affection.

 

Everything can be simple, even love, when you know how it works.

  • Like 2
d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
Posted
- ALWAYS let the woman bring up being exclusive. If she isn't talking about it, keep things as is.

 

Funny. As a woman, I always preferred when the guy started that conversation. Then I knew I wasn't being a pushy, clingy "woman".

  • Like 2
fitnessfan365 Established Member

fitnessfan365

Posted
Posted
Funny. As a woman, I always preferred when the guy started that conversation. Then I knew I wasn't being a pushy, clingy "woman".

 

To me, it just feels natural when the woman brings it up because receiving emotional foundation comes more from feminine energy. Then the guy takes action and makes it official if he's ready.

Gary S Established Member

Gary S

Posted
Posted

^^^yup. It's the women who primarily drive the relationship. She decides if there will be a relationship, and how long it's going to last. Nothing is going to happen until she is ready. :D That's just the way it works :p

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