elinsley Posted March 10, 2015 Posted March 10, 2015 I will try and keep this as short as possible, but sorry in advance! So here's the back story: My ex dumped me just over 2 months ago. I didn't see it coming and was completely heartbroken, he's the only guy I've ever loved. (He's 18, I'm 19). When he dumped me he said it was because he felt the initial spark we had was gone and he didn't want a relationship anymore. I asked him a few times if that was it, if we were done for good and he kept saying that he didn't know, that if he wanted a relationship in a few months then maybe we could get back together, but he didn't want to say "maybe someday" and get my hopes up. He said we could still be friends. Did I mention I also work with him? Only on weekends though. Anyway, even though he said we could be friends we just blanked each other at work. (He was fine with me until he thought I went on a date with someone else and then boom, he just blanked me). There was a staff party about a month after we broke up and we both went. I decided I would just blank him and enjoy myself for the first time since the breakup which is exactly what I did. He came up to me a couple of times, told me he was drunk and that I looked good and asked about this guy I was with. Lets call this other guy D for now. When he asked about D I just said he's a really nice guy and that he works on my department and then I just walked away. Me and D got pretty drunk and ended up kissing in front of my ex. Right after I realised what I had done and left the party. The following Friday me and my ex went to the cinema to see a movie. I decided to ask him because I was sick of it being awkward between us and I only intended for us to go as friends. When we were watching the movie he started flirting with me and continued to do so all night. We went to get food after the movie and he started asking about my friends, especially the guys and he asked about D. He also said "so, I heard you found someone new". I was so shocked when he said this I just said "what?!" and then he covered what he said with a joke. I didn't answer any of his questions with a straight answer because he didn't ask me straight up. It was like he was trying to ask without making it too obvious that he was bothered about who I hang out with and what I do in my spare time. After food he flirted with me even more and then we ended up kissing, and I mean a proper kiss. He texts me later on saying he really enjoyed out night together and he was sorry about the kiss. He said it shouldn't have happened. I responded by calling him a kid who didn't know what he wanted and I couldn't wait around for him anymore. I told him I could do so much better and thanked him for proving that to me. His response was that he didn't want a relationship but that doesn't stop him from being attracted to me. This is when I went into no contact. I blocked him on Facebook and cut off all contact. The following day at work I had to work with D (he works on my department so I can't avoid him). It wasn't awkward at all. We just always have a laugh and a joke together and just get on really well, nothing more. Anyway my ex was giving us dirty looks that day and he kept rolling his eyes at us. I managed to complete the 30 day no contact period. During this time I had been working to boost my confidence, I even went out on a few dates. I made it clear to my ex that there are plenty of guys who want to go out with me, someone from work even asked me out right in front of his friend! However during the NC period D kept telling me that my ex and his friend kept looking at me. I thought he was just imagining it or something until during the last weekend of NC I decided for once I would pay attention to what my ex was doing. I caught him 3 times looking at me, and everytime I caught him he looked away immediately. What makes things more interesting is D went into the stockroom near the end of the shift on the same weekend and my ex's friend nodded in D's direction. D was really confused until he walked in a little further and saw my ex stood there. That suggests to me that my ex and his friend have been talking about me and D, and since the kiss happened a month before this they have probably been doing it for weeks. I contacted my ex last night, just a simple text. I made it funny and just asked him how he was and I got no response. I was so sure he would respond, even if it was negative. Any ideas as to why he ignored it? It seems to me like he still cares with his behaviour at work and the fact he got jealous but then he didn't respond. I'm just so confused :S
d0nnivain Posted March 10, 2015 Posted March 10, 2015 NC is forever, not 30 days. Live your life. Let him live his. Do not try to be friends. It's too soon.
KBarletta Posted March 10, 2015 Posted March 10, 2015 It sounds to me like he is sticking to NC. You should, too. 1
PegNosePete Posted March 10, 2015 Posted March 10, 2015 Any ideas as to why he ignored it? Well I'm no Sherlock Holmes, but could it possibly be anything to do with these facts that you posted about: I didn't answer any of his questions with a straight answer I responded by calling him a kid who didn't know what he wanted and I couldn't wait around for him anymore. I told him I could do so much better and thanked him for proving that to me. I blocked him on Facebook and cut off all contact. If you had said all that to me, I think I would probably not respond to a "hey how are you" text either.
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