throwaway321 Posted March 10, 2015 Posted March 10, 2015 Long story shorter, she did something that really pissed me off. I told her that the next day and she appeared really apologetic and wanted us to meet up for lunch. Against my gut, we do and I'm intentionally aloof the whole time (juvenile I know, sue me). At one point she even asks me if I wanted her to leave half-jokingly. After the lunch, she is very affectionate (has told me previously she hates PDA beyond hand holding), we talked and admittedly most of my anger subsided. I invite her to my place a few days later where we just watch some TV. During the whole time though, she seems lost in her own world and is playing games on her phone mostly. She does end up staying the night, though no sex though we done it multiple times previously. She said she was tired and honestly, I was probably too tired to even try too. So I dunno, feels like we're in such an odd spot right now. We've been dating for a month and a half now, just not sure how we're supposed to 'progress' the relationship now.
toscaroscura Posted March 10, 2015 Posted March 10, 2015 What do you mean, you can't get a reading on her? Sounds like she can't get a reading on you, because you're playing intentional passive-aggressive mind games. I don't see her behaving oddly here, she's just reacting to you. Also it would help to know what she did to piss you off so much. I get the feeling it probably wasn't that huge of a deal and that you rather like the idea of her groveling for your forgiveness.
Author throwaway321 Posted March 10, 2015 Author Posted March 10, 2015 I made it clear to her I was angry after it happened and that I felt we had reconciled after the date. Nothing passive about it. And she had stood me up and had me waiting till well past midnight, I think most guys would take that as being slighted
toscaroscura Posted March 10, 2015 Posted March 10, 2015 I made it clear to her I was angry after it happened and that I felt we had reconciled after the date. Nothing passive about it. And she had stood me up and had me waiting till well past midnight, I think most guys would take that as being slighted Being "intentionally aloof" while she was "really apologetic" smacks of passive aggressive behavior. You didn't say what she did. I still stand by what I said. I don't get anything weird off her behavior. She was probably just confused and desperate to patch things up.
stillafool Posted March 10, 2015 Posted March 10, 2015 I can understand your being angry with her standing you up and making you wait until after midnight. Also she seems disconnected and basically uninterested. This is suppose to be the honeymoon stage of your relationship and it isn't going too good. I would step back from her if I were you and start seeing other people.
Author throwaway321 Posted March 10, 2015 Author Posted March 10, 2015 I can understand your being angry with her standing you up and making you wait until after midnight. Also she seems disconnected and basically uninterested. This is suppose to be the honeymoon stage of your relationship and it isn't going too good. I would step back from her if I were you and start seeing other people. That was sort of my thought as well but it's just weird since she's the one who took the initiative for the first kiss on date 1 (I thought it was a good date, but not THAT good) and sets up about half of the dates we've gone on. Maybe the end, just really disappointing
preraph Posted March 10, 2015 Posted March 10, 2015 Well, I'm glad you stood up for yourself. If she keeps it up, she may just be the type who can't control themselves. I've known plenty of people who just can't get their crap together. All you can do is keep getting to know her and see if it's going anywhere or if she gets worse as her dating behavior falls away, which very well could happen if she started out standing you up!
GemmaUK Posted March 10, 2015 Posted March 10, 2015 Anger and telling her or not - she isn't very interested IMO. Best to just move on.
Author throwaway321 Posted March 10, 2015 Author Posted March 10, 2015 The funny thing is she texted me a bit ago apologizing for how tired she was and asking if I'm free later this week I don't even know how/what to respond at this point
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