NGC1300 Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 Remember that line? So cliché it can longer be used. Here's another one that's approaching the same level of cliché-ness: "I need time to figure myself out". Hahahahahaha. If you even hear this from a woman, it's code for I already have another dick inside me as I text you this message. 2
Jessie1231 Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 Another good one is "I'm just not ready for a relationship," which really means, "I'm just not ready for a relationship with you, and I never will be." 2
Author NGC1300 Posted March 7, 2015 Author Posted March 7, 2015 Another good one is "I'm just not ready for a relationship," which really means, "I'm just not ready for a relationship with you, and I never will be." Funny, the last girl I dated said exactly that, in conjunction with "need time to figure myself out". No lie.
Jessie1231 Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 Funny, the last girl I dated said exactly that, in conjunction with "need time to figure myself out". No lie. Yes, that was the line I got from my last boyfriend when he ended things. Then he proceeded to jump right into a relationship with the woman he was cheating with.
mightycpa Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 So, just out of curiosity, if the girl has decided that she doesn't like you enough to date you, what words would you like to hear? I don't want to see you anymore. Oh, and for the record, it's not me, it's you! Normally, I'd call instead of texting, but my mouth is full right now. See ya! I don't think so. Be careful what you wish for, and try to appreciate that they think enough of you to spare your feelings a little, even if it is a little clumsy. 3
Author NGC1300 Posted March 7, 2015 Author Posted March 7, 2015 So, just out of curiosity, if the girl has decided that she doesn't like you enough to date you, what words would you like to hear? I don't think so. Be careful what you wish for, and try to appreciate that they think enough of you to spare your feelings a little, even if it is a little clumsy. Right, because I can't see through their BS. I'd RATHER hear the real reason, as it won't be any more of a blow.
Arieswoman Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 Some more old chestnuts .... "You deserve someone better than me" "I don't want a serious relationship" " I love you but I'm not in love with you" " I love you as a friend/sister/brother" " I don't want anything heavy" " I haven't got time for all this courting stuff" " I need space/time to finish my novel/to canoe down the Amazon..." and the most famous "I'll call you" 1
mightycpa Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 (edited) Right, because I can't see through their BS. I'd RATHER hear the real reason, as it won't be any more of a blow.Why? All you'd do is judge it: a) yeah, I can see that b) true, but that's no reason to stop seeing me c) I can change! d) untrue Honestly, I think that 9 times out of 10, it's just a vibe, or a lack thereof. You just don't fit, and it is difficult to describe anything in particular... it's more like a multitude of things, and there's not enough redeeming about you in that person's eyes to make them want to keep you around. Do you really want to hear a laundry list of things, or only the top 3? EDIT: Let's make that 4 times out of 10. 5 times out of 10 is that there's somebody else. Then the reason is, I went out with somebody, and I like them so much better than I like you. Ouch. Who wants to hear that out loud? The trouble with reasons is that we exist on a continuum, not on a scale or hierarchy. What works for one person doesn't for another, but that doesn't make either of you better or worse. So just because she doesn't like the clothes you wear, the way you express yourself and/or the way you treat a waiter doesn't mean that everybody else will feel the same way. In this respect, what one person thinks doesn't matter. For your own sanity, I'd suggest that you avoid listening to those reasons, as long as you are being true to yourself. It's not like you're going to change, so what's the point? If someone doesn't like you enough to date you, then they don't. Next! Edited March 7, 2015 by mightycpa 3
katiegrl Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 There was another thread saying this (fitnessfan said it) but all I say is, "enjoyed meeting you but don't feel enough chemistry to pursue anything further." Can't really argue with that, although some men still do! Like "Oh come on, give me a chance" or -- and I nearly fell off my chair when one guy responded with -- "What? Do you know how much "green" I have"!! THAT one takes the cake!
Dybbuk Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 I agree. BS lines are the worst. As a woman, I think because we are more 'emotional' (Does not apply to everyone, but generally) we try to craft responses we think will soften the blow. Guys tend to be more 'direct' and want a logical reason why you and him couldn't move forward. I had to stop feeding guys responses I thought they wanted to hear, and instead give them what they asked for. I'd do so politely (no need to be rude), and half the time guys said 'ok' and moved on. The other half would get a little snarky. Oh well. I finally told myself that it's understandable that someone (whether they be man or woman) is upset when they are rejected. After all as the dumper, my feelings weren't hurt and my ego was just fine. So I always tried to dump people with as much integrity as I could. No matter what you say, the dumpee is going to get their feelings hurt. So best not to insult their intelligence on top of dumping them and not feed any BS lines you wouldn't like to hear if you were being dumped. If they come back and ask why, tell them why. Do so in a polite manner, no need to rub salt in the wound... but if they have balls to ask why, then have the balls to tell them why. If they argue with your reasons why, just shut down the conversation and go NC. "I understand you're upset, but you asked why and I told you. I can't change how I feel. Best of luck." Done.
chimpanA-2-chimpanZ Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 If "it's not you, it's me" is cliche it's because it's so common. Sometimes there is nothing wrong with the other person, you just don't feel romantically attached the way you ought to. Admitting your own lack of attachment is the responsible, mature thing to do. If someone does not want to be with you anymore that's all you need to know. Most times their reasons relate to things you can't change. Just accept you weren't a good match and move on.
mightycpa Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 no need to rub salt in the wound...well, that's the problem in a nutshell, isn't it? Almost 100% of the time, it is the dumpee, not the dumper. I mean, at least, from the perspective of the dumper it's almost always that way. Whatever it is about the dumpee, it is about the dumpee, not the other way around. Nobody ever dumps somebody and then sets out to change themselves to make the dumpee a better fit. Nobody. Instead, they go find someone who's a better fit for who the dumper already is. It's not me, it's you just has a little too much truth in it. 1
Buddhist Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 Remember that line? So cliché it can longer be used. Here's another one that's approaching the same level of cliché-ness: "I need time to figure myself out". Hahahahahaha. If you even hear this from a woman, it's code for I already have another dick inside me as I text you this message. Or code for you're such an arse I can't even be bothered explaining it to you....and yes I have found a better dick or I soon will.
katiegrl Posted March 7, 2015 Posted March 7, 2015 Or code for you're such an arse I can't even be bothered explaining it to you....and yes I have found a better dick or I soon will. Buddhist, are you okay today? Did something happen? You seem a little down on men today....which is not like you.
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