thinkingguy Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Me and my girlfriend broke up about 2 months ago. We really havent talked at all, just an email here or there. I still have slight feelings for her, but not too strong. I was just wondering how to handle a situation, and also just need a little interpretation on some things she said last night when we talked. First off, she asked if i had met anyone new. I have posted on here before about someone who i am casually with, but nothing serious. I dont want anything serious, its just fun. When she asked i just skirted the question pretty effectively. Is this wrong or should i tell her the truth?? Also for some background, I believe i want her back more than she wants me, and here are some things she said during our conversation. She made it known from the beginning that she missed me a whole lot. I did not really say i missed her, i avoided the question. Then out of nowhere, which suprised me, she asked if i missed her at all. She then quickly said not to answer. Good ploy huh. I responed "ok i wont answer" and she said "i guess that means you dont". I responded by saying "no, you told me not to answer the question". Then that was that. Then she said "i probably wouldnt miss me either". This is something she always did, trying to make me feel sorry for her. I did not give in b/c i just think she wants to her that i miss her, which i do, but not nearly as much as i used to. That was basically it. She seemed interested, maybe a little too interested, in what i have been doing. I was just trying to get someones opinion, on why she wanted to talk, and what she meant by some of the things she said. Thanks for reading, and im looking forward to some responses.
crazychick Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 Just wondering, but why did you guys breakup? Was it a mutal thing or did she breakup with you or vice versa? It could be that she just wants you to miss her. Or she just wants to know that you feel the same way she does. Seems like she was just fishing for info on you, maybe she is hanging on to the fact that maybe there is a chance for the 2 of you. From your side, its probably better that you don't answer things like that because you don't want to make her think that there is anything between the 2 of you if there isn't. From her side, if she does want to get back together it is probably it really painful not to hear that you miss her too. But you dont want to give her mixed signals. Breakups take time to get over. I am learning this myself right now and I hate it!!!! If you don't want to move forward with her at all then don't go back and let her in.
prncssfce9 Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 No offense to your ex but she sounds a little needy and crazy. All she is doing is fishing for compliments that you DO NOY owe to her in any way. Wheter you broke up with her or she broke up with you (which I am guessing is the case, generally when guys end a relationship they don't miss the girl after the fact) she has no right to be all up in your business. Ending a relationship is just that ENDING! SHe has no claim to you, and no right to priviledged facts about her. While you say that you want her back I feel it might be in you best interest to NOT get back with her. This will just turn into one of those "on again off again" type relationships that will leave you feeling worthless. You deserve better than that. If you have to courage to do so .... tell you point blank that you DON'T miss her, even if that is a lie, sometiimes, some people respond only to dractic measures. Good Luck ... sorry if I sounded to harsh.
Fuzzy Chickens Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 I have a friend named George who always accuses us of having a much lower opinion of him than we do. He's an attention whore. He's weak. So is your ex-girlfriend.
Author thinkingguy Posted April 8, 2005 Author Posted April 8, 2005 Our breakup was something that i thought might be coming. My feelings were in one of the down stages. However, it seemed harder this time to get them back. So i was acting different towards her. She obviously knew something was wrong. Well she called wanting to come over and talk and she asked if i still loved her to which i replied "I dont know". So eventually we ended up breaking up. I call this a mutual breakup but i guess anyone can interpret it for however they want to. Then things got weird. A friend of mine (who likes to cause trouble) called me the next day telling me she was hanging out with this guy all day. I got upset and called her, only b/c of what my friend told me, and told her the breakup may not be a good idea. She said it was a good idea, and that we shouldnt get back together. This is why i say i probably want her back more than she wants me. I know its normal to miss someone when you breakup but i did not expect to miss her as much as i did b/c i wanted the breakup. I then felt angry probably b/c i felt that i was trying to save our relationship by staying in it even when i was not very happy towards the end. I kind of felt like she was just jumping off the ship, while i so many times before did not do this when i had the opportunity. I was very confused for a while. I was just exremely confused when we talked the other night and she kept asking me those questions. I do not know why she would ask stuff like that. And the last thing is that me and this other girl have started doing stuff. Nothing serious like i said before, but still we do stuff together. It is usually once a week on the weekends as i do not want her to think that things are getting serious between us. I am the most confused person in the world right now.
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 I wouldn't call her weak or needy or crazy. It sounds like she could be a little insecure (and we all are guilty of this at some point in our lives). She just needs to grow and learn about relationships along the way, what to do and what not to do; learn to recognize patterns and mistakes and how to change these little things.
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