Marshbear Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 I have a ex friend who has been mad at me for a long time. She will not talk to me, look at me or make any acknowledgement as to my presence at any time. I know she is mad because you can see it in her by the way she looks at me and by the way she avoids me at all costs. I have tried to talk to her but to no avail. We had a problem with each other awhile back but don't you think she should be over the anger by now ( over a year and a half )? Why can't some people let it go? Does it give them pleasure to know they are bothering you by acting this way? I think she intends to be mad for life. I really don't understand how someone would want to be like this and why she can't get past it. We see each other often enough for it to really bug the Sh*t out or me. Any thoughts?
d'Arthez Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Depends on what exactly happened and how she perceived it. Even if you think it is something small, she might think differently. Also, it may be that she is someone like me; easy to make friends with, but once someone lashes out on me unprovoked, I don't find it difficult to drop a person completely, and avoiding any conversation. That might be perceived as hostile.
Author Marshbear Posted April 7, 2005 Author Posted April 7, 2005 Depends on what exactly happened and how she perceived it. Even if you think it is something small, she might think differently. We were good friends for a few years and then she started to act differently toward our relationship. She shut me out and when I asked her about it she said wasn't doing anything and that it was my problem. This went on for about 6 months and finally I had had enough and told her how she was behaving. I told her she was not being a friend to me and I felt like we needed a break from each other. She blew up and when I asked to talk to her about it she said she didn't want to. She also said some very nasty things to me at that time which hurt me deeply. I have gotten over it and I am not asking to be best friends again but I do think we could speak to each other in passing. She totally hates me and will not even entertain the possibility of talking ever again....
d'Arthez Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 There is nothing you can do about it. She seems to behave like a small child. Her loss and not yours. If she is acting badly towards you in company, people will pick it up, and as there is no reason for her to behave so badly, they will hopefully figure out who is in the right, and who is in the wrong. Sorry I can't offer you something more optimistic.
Author Marshbear Posted April 7, 2005 Author Posted April 7, 2005 Thanks your your input. I have tried everything I can to be civil to each other but to no avail. As to her acting around others she tries to avoid all contact with me so most people do not even know we have a problem. If you knew or history you would know something was amiss but she hides it and generally will leave the room if I enter. She will not mention my name to friends even though they can't understand why she behaves like she does. I guess she was never a true friend and I should feel lucky to be rid of her but it still bothers me that she hates me soooo much. If she just felt indifferent I could handle that but her anger at me is very disturbing....
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