sparklesboy Posted March 5, 2015 Posted March 5, 2015 (edited) Hello community! I'm with this girl for over one year (both aries). We had some problems we ignored from the begging. Our main problem from the start was the lack of communication and less things to talk about although we had the attraction, affection and pleasure of being together. We both had some things that did not like about each other but we choose not to say until they hurt us most and this made a lot of presure inside our relationship. Another thing is that she had an issue contacting me if for some reason I ignore her. She always told me "if you don't I won't either, because i won't know you want me" and we still have this issue. One early mistake I made was to say her that it will be hard to love someone again being hurt from the past. Although at some point I started having feelings for her i did not confess because of fear. Two mouths ago i started a new job and we started to see less. I've become stressed and cold and she done the same (we influence each other). She become more socially and flirty with other dudes and i suspect she planned to date one. Recently at her indication we had a discussion about us. She started by saying that she still wants us together and that she cares of me but is not love. I told her that i have some feelings and don't want to lose our relationship and she said that is hard to believe me now. Since then we spent a lot of quality time together but i feel her being quite absent while I'm maybe to passionate, clingy and jealous. She's saying that needs time to adjust to the new us being good all the sudden. I see her trying and also know there are chances to lose it but i can't let her go without knowing i did everything i could to win her back. When we are apart i feel like she's ignoring me and I can't stand it...but i try not to be mad about it. So my question is.. what can i do with myself and my actions to get her back interested in me? I must say that in general I don't have patience I want things to happen fast ..and this is how i break things. It's clear to me that a lot of love won't move her as i expected, maybe an interesting "game" could do the trick... but how i do that? Edited March 5, 2015 by sparklesboy edit text
d0nnivain Posted March 5, 2015 Posted March 5, 2015 What little things do you do to show that you care about her & want a romance? If I were you I would: * send a good morning / thinking about you text every day * hide little love notes around her house. Every once in a while I stick one on the coffee pot for DH to find or on the steering wheel of his car * get her flowers for no reason (delivered to her office if you can afford it; brought home from the grocery store < $10 if money is an issue) * take her on a romantic date even if it's a picnic in the living room * cook dinner with her or for her * do her laundry / get the oil changed in her car / pick up her dry cleaning -- do some chore she hates * send her a snail mail card In this age of electronic communication something more tangible is so sweet * give her a foot massage or back rub * run her a hot bubble bath with candles; don't initially join her -- just let her soak / relax
Author sparklesboy Posted March 5, 2015 Author Posted March 5, 2015 (edited) What little things do you do to show that you care about her & want a romance? I already did some of this.. It's ok, she seems happy at the moment but i want her to be long-term involved.. This things take time right? I should make lots of sweet things to her and just wait for her to adjust and get back in the line? Yestarday she told me we are in the same book of love only at different chapters... Edited March 5, 2015 by sparklesboy edit content
d0nnivain Posted March 5, 2015 Posted March 5, 2015 Sadly it seems like she may be looking for a way out in which case all the romance in the world by you won't change her mind.
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