billybadass36 Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 A recent post about a guy breaking up with a girl via voice mail has sort of brought this up for me. When I was younger, I used to routinely go out with, hook up with, sting along, and then just disappear on women after dating for weeks and even months. In hindsight, I was an immature assclown who was afraid to confront these women to let them know "Hey, it was fun, you're a great gal, but I just don't see this going anywhere." Which brings up another thing: my fiancee's roommate was dating a guy for like 8 months. They exchanged "I love yous", were totally monogamous, she'd watch his kids, they'd spend 5 nights a week together...I mean it was getting totally serious, and then yesterday BAM out of nowhere he tells her while they're riding to the gym that he doesn't see their relationship going anywhere and that they should just stop seeing each other. Then he asks her, "So whattaya want to do?" She replied, "I want to go work out." So she calls my fiancee from the phone in the gym, telling her that she thinks she's getting dumped. So guess whose fiancee is going to be wing-manning a whirlwind, manhating, debauch this weekend? Yeah, mine. Good thing I have a get together out of town.... Anyway, back to the original question: what's the worst way to be broken up with? I think pulling the Houdini disappearing act that I did all the time is probably the worst way to go because the other person is just left wondering what the hell happened. I think the second worst is this total blindside like my fiancee's roommate has just encountered...I mean everything was fine and then just *BAM* - "it's not going anywhere"....
NTB Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 i say via e-mail i mean one minute your talking face to face and then all you get is an e-mail telling you it is over.....that sucks or i use to do this too when i was younger looking back it was bad sleeping over and waking up like 4am and just leave her place and never talking to her again.
LucreziaBorgia Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Voice Mail E-mail Having a mutual Friend break the news Abandonment with no explanation Incorporating the replacement before the original is aware of the breakup Leaving a note Publically and humiliatingly Being led to believe its your fault, when it really isn't Hearing about it from someone else
IhavenoFREAKINclue Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 On a post-it. Uh that has to be the worst!
whichwayisup Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 The night before final exams!! ON the phone! Yes, this happened to me! What an A-hole eh?
Fallen_Angel Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Originally posted by IhavenoFREAKINclue On a post-it. Uh that has to be the worst! OMG I loved that episode! Or when Miranda said she was broken up with by the guy's doorman: "Miss Hobbs, Jonathan won't be coming down. EVER." Not long after that episode aired, one of our local radio stations had a morning show about the worst ways people have been dumped. One girl called in and said her ex was on the football team & had a message posted on the scoreboard. Ouch. I myself have been dumped via instant messenger. Damn coward.
whichwayisup Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 I think pulling the Houdini disappearing act that I did all the time is probably the worst way to go because the other person is just left wondering what the hell happened. I think the second worst is this total blindside like my fiancee's roommate has just encountered...I mean everything was fine and then just *BAM* - "it's not going anywhere".... Not knowing is worse than knowing!! Atleast knowing one can deal with the reasonings and feelings - Have closure. Yeah that really sucks and it's cruel! How could anybody knowingly KNOW and DO that? Talk about SHOCK! One day all is great and the next you're OUT! WTF!
simon_uk Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Apparently Bert McCracken lead singer of the band 'The Used' broke up with his then girlfriend Kelly Osbourne whilst she was in the crowd of one of his gigs! Over the Mic in front of everyone! Thats gotta hurt!
westernxer Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Kurt Cobain broke up with an ex in similar fashion. Between songs, he uttered to the audience that Courtney Love was the greatest f.u.c.k. in the world... to the dismay of then-girlfriend Mary Lou Lord, who was in attendance that evening. That was his way of breaking up, since he didn't have the nerve to tell it to her face. Turns out he was dating both women at the same time, and Courtney gave him an ultimatum. The rest is history.
blind_otter Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Originally posted by billybadass36 Anyway, back to the original question: what's the worst way to be broken up with? I think pulling the Houdini disappearing act that I did all the time is probably the worst way to go because the other person is just left wondering what the hell happened. I think the second worst is this total blindside like my fiancee's roommate has just encountered...I mean everything was fine and then just *BAM* - "it's not going anywhere".... Well, I got blindsided (not really) and it SUCKED HAIRY BALLS. Actually what happened was, I called my psycho ex and said, "I would rather tell you to your face, I just need to talk to you right now" He insisted I tell him right then, so I was like, "I'm pregnant" He was at a bar and I could tell. He said, "I''ll call you back" and I didn't hear from him again for like 2 weeks. Pretty much, we were done after that. Hate to say it, but it's a good thing I lost the baby.
EC Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Abandonment with no explanation I would have to say that is the worst. It happened to me..no call...no explanation..then he changed numbers and moved out of town? I mean C'mon are you serious? It was a very horrible experience not knowing anything at all..No closure! It was horrible. What was worse is that I ran into him again..we hooked up again for a while and then he did the same thing AGAIN!! From then on I called him Houdini!
Mz. Pixie Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Ummm, I dated this one guy right after my separation before my current BF. He was absolutely gorgeous, financially well off, and a smooth talker. He seemed to be very serious about me. He was divorced and had four kids although that wasn't a deal breaker for me. We had plans one day and I texted him to meet me. He never texted back. I called him, he never called back. Later I got worried because he was always calling me and texting me. I thought something was wrong. I texted him to please call me I was worried about him. He text me he was sick and he would call me the next day. Cool. Later that afternoon I get a call from his number, answer it. It's some woman. She says that she is his g/f and that they have decided to pursue their relationship and that I shouldn't call him anymore. I didn't know he was dating anyone else- he acted like I was the only one. I just said okay and hung up because I didn't know what to say. What 38 year old man has his g/f break up with someone for him? I sent him a little email, telling him real mature. Perhaps his g/f would like to see some of the emails he had been sending me? Never heard a word. Three weeks later I get a e mail from the g/f's daughter. She saw my e mail address on the email I sent him telling him off. I guess he forwarded it to his g/f and she printed it. Anyway the daughter is very upset. Turns out the gf has had cancer and was undergoing chemo and he dumped her during that. Her chemo was over and then he wanted to go back to her and she took him back. She was worried he was just playing her. Two weeks later he dumps her in a email. Go figure. Who dumps someone during cancer treatment?? I dodged a big bullet but that was my wierdest breakup.
westernxer Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 I dodged a big bullet but that was my wierdest breakup. Wow! Quite a catch you let go.
The Dreamer Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 I believe if a time comes for a break up...ALWAYS be honest...no matter how hurtful it may be. The Truth Will Set You Free!
snipit3172 Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 mine was a great relationship actually the best i had been in we spent all our time together and when we did not we would text or email each other one weekend he asked me if i fancied going away for weekend with his parents i said yes 2 days later he text me and said he would ringh me from work later and that was last i heard off him that was over 6 months ago and i still have no clue what happened
Donut Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Getting dumped over the phone (when you think things are going well) after three years and then ignored afterward is a bitch. Turns out my ex is a commitment phobe, blamed me for trivial things to justify what he'd done then ran away. He's on the search for the "perfect" woman, well good luck with that assclown! Oh that felt good
amytct Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 My ex never told me anything, just stopped answering my phone calls and e-mails. That is the worst, completely heartless and unbelievably cruel. And to think I loved him!
Three of Swords Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 This post made me remember a boyfriend from the distant past. I was all of eighteen years old and we are going out exclusively for about three months. During one of our telephone conversations I got the "I have to go, my toast is burning". Yup - that was the end of the relationship. I was very confused, hurt and wondering what was wrong with me, what short-comings did I have. The whole self-doubt thing. He left town shortly thereafter. A few months later, he blew back into town and asked me out for drinks - silly me accepted. He proceeded to get totally drunk and told me he loved me!!! I wisely refrained from echoing the sentiment. We hung out the next day and then I went back with him to where he lived which was a four hour bus ride away. Was with him for the remainder of the day during which we made plans to live together. (I was niave.) He walked me to the bus as I had to get back to my home/job and said he would stop by in two weeks to give me time to end my job - give notice etc. He would pick me up and the we would head out west together. Again, never heard from him! This time I was less surprised. Got a different job and tried to carry on with my life. He blows back into town another couple of months later - sees me at a club and says hey nice to see you. But by then I was with the man who I was to be with for the next 27 years. Nearly a year ago when I left the hubby, I gave him a ONE MONTH notice. Things weren't going so well, so he asked that I let him know if we were at the end - cause he didn't want the house cleaned out, note on the kitchen table break-up. It was a tough month, but in the end we are still relatively amicable. So was this worth it? (it is better for the kids!) My re-entry into the dating scene about a month ago showed me nothing much has changed. I thought the guy was into me and I have been soo lonely - so ended up sleeping with him. Guess that was the end of it and I have discovered that I am back to being niave. Maybe cause I have been in the shelter of a relationship for sooo long. Forgot how this shyte sometimes works. So far have not been given the courtesy of any kind of dismissal. I still see the man several times a week and he just gives me the casual hi - how's it going. As if nothing ever happened. BTW - I am going to say never date/sleep with a co-worker. I repeat NEVER. Just to freakin awkward. Especially without any 'closure'. I am feeling like I am 18 all over again here - and it's painful! So yeah - break-ups/endings suck, but I think I would still rather get some kind of ending rather than be left so dam^ confused.
Three of Swords Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 BTW - going through the same OLD self doubt. What is wrong with me? What shortcomings do I have, why doesn't he want me? Ugg.
Numb Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 The worst way to break up.... It would have to be the way my ex did it, cheat on me for 8months(together for 3 years) since she was scared to tell me it was over. Then at the end of the 8 months tell me we need a break but the whole time telling me that everything will be OK and she just needs another week on her own then another week again and still telling me everything is fine and she will be moving back in, still kissing me and saying I love you with hugs and everything...........Just for me to find out she is with someone else this whole time. NOW THAT IS THE WORST WAY TO BREAK UP THAT I KNOW OF ANYWAYS.
eastern_mystique Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 These are probably not the absolute worst ways to break up with someone but they're the ones I've experienced: 1.) Over Email: I broke up with my first boyfriend this way....but before you start throwing sharp objects at me I had no choice! He lived in Canada, and I live in England (I met him when I was there for the summer) so I couldn't do it face to face. To my credit however, it was a very lengthy and kind email detailing the reasons why our relationship could never work out, even thought I loved him dearly. So he wasn't left in any doubt as to my reasons why. Plus we never saw each other again, which made it in the long run for us to get over each other. 2.) In Public: My most recent beau ditched me this way. It was at college, in the reception area, his friends in the background...the most gut-wrenching 45 minutes of my life for sure. Me looking like a wreck, tears running down my face...not my prettiest moment. And then he has the audacity to ask if he can walk me home. Moron.
IhavenoFREAKINclue Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 Some people just sleep with hookers and hopefully I'll find out and break up with HIM! Bastard
beejsea2 Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 Well I of course feel that being dumped by email, letter or voice mail message is just down right cowardly!! I was dumped almost six months ago by my ex of 4 1/2 years by a letter while I was at work...he packed everything and left via a U'Haul. Male/female I don't care of the gender but they owe it to the person that they were involved with to make that break in person!! I still find myself some days banging my head against the wall trying to figure everything out!! A week (well even days) before my ex left he was telling me he loved me and stuff that we were going to do...all lies!! Since the time he has left I have come across a lot information about him and more so a lot of things that he kept me in the dark about!! I guess the hardest part of the way he broke it off with me is that I'll never have the answers of what was so bad that he had to leave...
masaki1085 Posted April 10, 2005 Posted April 10, 2005 My recent break-up: Day after Valentine's Day, 5 days before my birthday (February 20). This after I spent about $80 on Flowers and a nice card. :\
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