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Posted

In the future though don't come on so needy, and the "Where do I stand" garbage was a bit excessive.

 

yes this^^^^

Posted
Update since last post she has said I am a decent Guy & that she likes me & wants to defo see me again (Which is good).

 

We haven't sorted next date out yet (Dunno when I should ask don't wanna sound to keen).

 

She still texts me like 1-3 times a day sometimes more but not loads... (think she don't use her phone that much)

 

She smiled at me today when saw her at football...

 

She last texted me yesterday (Morning) & I replied but nothing since. She always replies to my texts at some point....

 

Should I keep going with this girl?? She wanna take things slow but is she being to slow

 

I don't think you should keep going. Because you are already irritated and seemingly incompatible. She wants to take things slow but it obviously doesn't work for you. It doesn't feel like you are bringing out the best in one another and it's just the beginning. It's a shame. I think on the next one you should try to be more flexible in general--see things from their point of view. People are not possessions. As unfortunate as it sometimes is, the person who wants to go slowest is the one who sets the pace. Unless the other person doesn't agree, then there are only two choices: express yourself and other person agrees and speeds up or move on. If you still think she is being too slow, you will not be satisfied. I don't think she is being unreasonable. I do think she is trying to get thru to you and past your little temper tantrums though some may see it as game playing, I just think she is trying to assert the pace she is comfortable with and does want you to chase her a bit. It's all sounding kind of unhealthy. Anyway, good luck if you do you. Relax anyway, why the hurry?

  • Author
Posted (edited)

Thanks for advice I don't mind taking things slow etc but Gonna wait a few days & see if she texts me. Gonna keep my options open.

 

I am gonna go at her pace for now. I told her what I wanted & she said thats ok with her

 

If she gets back to me then great if not o well.

Edited by GTR King
  • Like 1
Posted

She's not interested and she doesn't sound very nice to be honest. Yes, best to ignore her and move on. Sorry, I know it's painful if you like someone.

Posted
Dude she's just playing games with you. She expected you to chase after her, and instead you said "OK".

 

You did everything perfect.. well almost -- was a bit excessive with saying sorry - that bitch didn't deserve a sorry. Don't let her play mind games with you.

 

 

In the future though don't come on so needy, and the "Where do I stand" garbage was a bit excessive.

 

THIS ^^^

 

You definitely should not have apologized at all. That made you look weak, but you were pretty indifferent which was the right move. One lesson you can learn from this, is to not over pursue like you did and to be a bit more indifferent.

  • Like 1
Posted
Update she texted me again

 

Her it's best we don't talk anymore take care x

 

Me ok

 

Her is that all you have to say? x

 

Me I am sorry about it all but I did enjoy our dates together but I told u how I felt :) x

 

Her I am sorry but I see that you don't wanna see me again but good luck :)

 

Me I am sorry to and did wanna see u again but good luck :)

 

Her I am sorry to no worries :)

 

Me ok sorry :)

 

Her Ok. I am kinda upset that it didn't work too, you seemed a decent guy

 

I said nothing about not wanting to see her again at all so dunno where she got that idea from.

 

But she didn't have to be rude to me at all...

 

I think it best I just leave her alone

 

I told her how I felt & said (This was yesterday) I am interested in you & would like to see you again & enjoyed our dates together but I feel like your not that interested in me as you hardly every text me and I am having to all the work etc...

 

Oh for god's sake... She tells you it's best you don't talk anymore, take care.....you say OK....and then she flips the script and accuses YOU of not wanting to see *her* anymore????

 

She sounds like a real peach.... sheesh!

 

You shouldn't have let her get away with that crap. You should've called her on that...what a piece of work she is....

 

What did she expect you to do...fall to pieces? Apparently she did and when you didn't, she flips it and attempts to make YOU the bad guy.

 

Don't talk to her again, block her and delete her. She's messed up in the head and playing games, move on.

  • Like 1
Posted

Dude you should not have gone back for seconds, but what's done is done.

 

Good luck with this one, you're gonna need it...

  • Author
Posted

Thanks for advice. So she flipped out when I said ok & made me feel like the bad guy :( well I got other options seen her 3 times but o well

Posted

She sounds like a LOT of work..

  • Author
Posted (edited)

Yeah she dose will not text me for a few days then suddenly pop up again & text me a few times then go quiet. She knows what I want etc. So up to her what she wanna do about it. Not gonna keep chasing Her etc.

Edited by GTR King
Posted

Hey GTR,

 

You made some fine decisions between your initial post and your recent one, in terms of your word choice and your acceptance of her pace. I think this is one reason why she is still looking to continue seeing you. Her rate of reply is somewhat questionable though - definitely differs from what you prefer, I know the feeling all too well....

 

Because you have experience from 1 long-term relationship under your belt, I think that you would greatly benefit by recalling the good and bad things from that one, and see how you can apply that to this relationship - in hopes that it won't turn out like that one.

 

I too am seeing someone who wants to take things slow. Moreover, she doesn't initiate text often - once, she couldn't reply until 2 days later but it was understandable because she had a work crisis. In my case, I am working and studying full-time for my final career change, a career I hope to stay in for the rest of my life. I don't seem myself finishing until the last month of this year though, so her saying she wants to take it slow doesn't affect my feelings for her. So with my future outlook already set, along with plenty of bills to manage, a fat student loan to keep on top of, car loan payments per month, and 2 full-time duties...I really don't mind if she wants to take it slow to keep getting to know me. I also don't mind her rate of reply and the fact that she rarely initiates text. To add on to that, even if I was simply working full-time without going to school, and even if I didn't have car and student loans to keep track of, I would still be ok with her choice of pace and her text preferences because she is the one for me.

 

 

I hope my situation provides extra enlightenment. : )

  • Author
Posted (edited)

I have had 2 relationships before

 

1st one 1 year 3 months (I did all the work)

 

2nd one 1 year 3 months then we broke up had 1 year 9 months break (In break we started seeing each other for 6 months after she got better) the got back together for 2 years... (ended on good terms)

 

I did like this girl I went on 3 dates with her.. I told her I wanted to see her again and let me know what u wanna do as would like to know. she flipped out on me saying we should not see each other again.. & then a day later we sorted things out and she said she wanna see me again and to forget about the argument. I told her I wanted to see her again get to know her better & see how things go... she agreed to that & said i would like a morning/night text & save talking face face as will have nothing to talk about on the dates... I accepted that & said could ring each other maybe one a week...

 

But she hasn't done that as has started texting a lot less since the 2nd date...

 

I am not gonna keep chasing her. Up to her if she wanna see me but if not o well her loss.

 

If she was that interested she would of seen me last week

Edited by GTR King
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