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If your partner kissed someone else?


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Posted

Say if you're partner was high on drink and drugs one night at a party, proceeded to make out with someone else, and then felt so guilty about it they called you within the hour and confessed to you their mistake?

 

 

What would you do?

Posted

If we didn't have an agreement that, as part of our sex play, another guy could fluff her for me, I'd probably be thinking her attraction to myself was unsustainably low and move on.

 

I mention the fluffing part because I've been a part of that triangle for some MW's. The interactions 'spice up' things for them. Each couple is different.

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Posted

They wouldn't be my partner anymore.

Posted
Say if you're partner was high on drink and drugs one night at a party, proceeded to make out with someone else, and then felt so guilty about it they called you within the hour and confessed to you their mistake?

 

 

What would you do?

 

I would probably cut them loose, but not for the making out part. I'd cut them loose because they have very, very bad judgment where they would engage in an activity that set up all else that followed. I don't need to be with someone who allows themselves to get "so high" or "so drunk", period. A confession doesn't mean anything to me--what they need to do is get help for their substance abuse problem.]

 

The guilt is more likely to be them coming down off their buzz because while they were buzzed, they thought it was good policy to make out with someone else.

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Posted
Say if you're partner was high on drink and drugs one night at a party, proceeded to make out with someone else, and then felt so guilty about it they called you within the hour and confessed to you their mistake?

 

 

What would you do?

 

Where I come from, that's called a mistake, and it's ALSO called cheating. That's cool they were honest. I'd like to reward honestly. Sadly, based on my past experiences, you can't reward cheaters. So I'm at an impasse. I would break up with them and never speak to them again. You're doing their future partners a favor.

 

 

Move on to someone who would not kiss someone else, even when drunk.

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Posted

Just how drunk and high can they have been? They can still operate a phone and talk coherently enough to be understood...

 

If its an exclusive, serious relationship: I'd be applying boot to a$$.

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Posted

It very much depends on the definition of "partner"

Posted

When I had my first apartment I asked the landlord if she could give me a 1 month extension and she said yes. The next month even though I had enough money I asked her for another extension which she agreed to. It got to a point where I had enough money to clear 3 months of arrears but chose not to because the sweet lady never wanted to say no. She eventually had her solicitor send a letter to leave the premises and pay 4 months rent arrears.

 

My point is that people will take advantage of any give & play, we are hard-wired to. If you forgive a kiss then the partner will keep cheating until you make them leave.

 

My other point is to alway pay your rent on time because it turns out that it ****s up your references!

Posted

I'd dump her for being high on drugs. I don't care if my SO flirts, kisses, or even has sex with someone else as long as she tells me - and vice versa. We have an open relationship, so that's allowed - for us.

 

In your case, since she regrets it and confessed immediately, and was in a state of lowered inhibitions, I'd cut her some slack and give her another chance - as long as she cut out the drugs and cut back on the drinking.

Posted

together in a committed relationship, one on one and the other kisses someone else because theyre drunk/drugged?

 

it would never happen with the women I date and I would never do that with a woman I date or I wouldnt date them.

Posted

I'd break up with them for using drugs, not the kissing.

Posted

I wouldn't be with anyone who wasn't able to exercise good judgement regardless of the situation. Period.

 

Substance abuse of any kind is a hard limit for me as well.

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