Nomad Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 I know that looks aren't important in attraction , but just pretending for a moment that they are...what do you ladies find attractive about a guy's looks?
Linlin Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 I like nice eyes and a nice smile. Fantasy guy: 6" tall or taller Toned muscular nice a$$ black hair blue eyes I alsmost said good laugh, qucik wit and dry sense of humour. But we are talking just looks.
Merin Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Physical Features I'm most attracted to are.. An amazing smile.. Good God I love good teeth! Eyes.. Brown is my favourite colour in eye colour With long lashes.. damn! Strong toned backs.. l Last.. dark hair.. but not long on a guy, I don't care for that.
faux Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 I am not a woman, but you may find this informative: All people find different things attractive; one person will find certain things attractive, while other people may or may not find those same things attractive. All people have different tastes. Being moderately pleased with oneself helps. Changing oneself to please another, specific person is not so wise. If one woman does not find you interesting for any number of reasons, another may find you alluring.
moimeme Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Some people think Steven Tyler is the hottest man on the planet. Others think Brad Pitt is. It's a pretty good bet that few think both are. Keep yourself clean and well-groomed and be pleasant and friendly. That'll make you attractive to the right sorts of people - the ones who will appreciate you.
RecordProducer Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 Looks are not important for happiness if you're a man! Self-confidence, a good heart, intelligence, success, and charm are the biggest turn-ons. Smile and laugh, be relaxed and spontaneous, passionate and cheerful, honest and kind...and women will love you! Trust me!
Author Nomad Posted April 7, 2005 Author Posted April 7, 2005 Remember folks...I said just PRETEND we live in an alternate dimension where people pick mates based on looks, & tell me what you'd find attractive. I know that intelligence & ambition are appealing. That's why all of those math whizzes in High School are fighting off the ladies while the dumb jocks struggle to improve their IQ. Faux, are you aware that numerous studies have indicated that standards of beauty transcend time & cultures? The same looks are found attractive again & again by varied people. That's not to say there's NO room for individual taste, I'm just saying that certain looks are found appealing when viewed by society as a whole. This makes perfect sense if you think about it: if looks were completely subjective & based upon individual preference, why would certain people be found attractive by so great a number of people (ie supermodels)? If attractive features were completely subjective, there'd be equal probability that Quentin Tarantino & Ashton Kutcher would be found attractive.
citygrrl Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 between 5'11" and 6'2", hazel eyes, brown hair, nicely-toned body, and a great smile are all pluses in my book. However... As far as looks go, I have met some real hotties who I did not find attractive, and some average-looking guys who I found to be extremely hott and sexy... Personality can make or break your attractiveness - looks can change, but if you have a terrific personality and you are kind, witty, funny, honest and sincere, those qualities will go much further than looks alone.
moimeme Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 That's why all of those math whizzes in High School are fighting off the ladies while the dumb jocks struggle to improve their IQ. Unless you're in high school, it's not an issue. People in high school haven't yet figured out that it's personality that counts. So they date physically stunning people, have a rotten time sometimes, and realize that the beauty didn't mean much. You could listen to all the people who have already tried that route and are sharing their experience, or you could keep asking hundreds of women to give you a standard to measure up to. And you will get hundreds of answers. Some women love tall, slim blondes. Others love shorter, chunkier bald guys. Others will want swimmers' bodies that are hairless and still others will want fuzzy fellows. You will never find a general standard. So how, exactly, do you plan to use this information? Dye your hair a different colour every day? Put on and lose 40 pound every couple of weeks? Wax all your hair off and then eat piles of Rogaine? Think of the ugliest actress you can. Now think of the most beautiful. Right now, thousands of men are daydreaming about the one you think ugly and thousands men are grossed out by the one you think beautiful. There is no standard. The 'universal' attributes you speak of are that facial features are symmetrical. So if an eye and eyebrow isn't in line, what you gonna do - have your whole face moved?
Author Nomad Posted April 8, 2005 Author Posted April 8, 2005 There are actually a few characteristics of universally attractive faces, including symmetry. The others are strong sex-specific traits (ie strong, wide jaw, strong chin in males, small chin & large eyes in females, high cheekbones in both sexes) as well as a sense of averageness (faces digitally composed from many faces averaged together are often found more attractive than single faces). And yes, if there was something to be fixed by "moving my whole" face, & such a procedure was within acceptable risk levels, I WOULD do it. I see nothing wrong with plastic surgery to improve looks. And for everyone gearing up to say, "Plastic surgery is superficial: it only fixes the outside, but you're still unhappy INSIDE"...you can save your breath. I think that looking better on the outside CAN make someone happier with themselves inside.
plasticman Posted April 8, 2005 Posted April 8, 2005 > Unless you're in high school, it's not an issue. This is not true. A first impression is always superficial. Men are more consistent about what they find attractive. Men don't drool over Kathy Bates, though she's a fine actress. Men like the babes on BayWatch: morons with great bodies. Women, on the other hand, voted Patrick Stewart (Picard from Star Trek) the sexiest man one year (for TV Guide). He's old, bald, short and has a huge nose. I've known women who find ordinary guys attractive for some reason. Women don't have a single well-defined standard, but they are still superficial. Hope that helps, A science geek who still can't meet women.
moimeme Posted April 9, 2005 Posted April 9, 2005 Once again. Look all around you. There are couples everywhere and very few of them are wildly attractive. The thing is that each of the pair thinks the other is great even if neither of them fit the criteria of 'attractive' per that formula. Have a look at the engagement announcements in the newspaper sometime. You'll be hard pressed to find model-quality looks among them, but those folks all love each other, are hot for each other, and are committing for life. I defy you boys to find the wedding notices with Baywatch Babes in them. Good luck
Tamed Wildflower Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 Originally posted by Nomad There are actually a few characteristics of universally attractive faces, including symmetry. The others are strong sex-specific traits (ie strong, wide jaw, strong chin in males, small chin & large eyes in females, high cheekbones in both sexes) as well as a sense of averageness (faces digitally composed from many faces averaged together are often found more attractive than single faces). When these studies are done, people are asked to look at digitally constructed faces and real people's faces in little frame boxes on paper and on screens. This completely discounts any interpersonal context that happens in REAL LIFE as an intrinsic part of attraction. The only thing CLOSE to this in the real world of dating is online personals with pictures, and even then the faces are real, are usually not expressionless (the expression says something about the person, and humanizes him/her in a way that the mugshots of lab experiments don't), and they come with information on the person's interests, hobbies, etc. If you want to learn about attraction, you won't learn much from sterile experiments. Better to go out to a social environment, a bar, party, or other social gathering where spirits are high and people are mingling. Watch people, the way they look at each other, the way they flirt, the way they touch, watch their mannerisms as they establish and communicate attraction. Heck, if you are not comfortable entering the dating scene, learn about it by being an ethnographer of it. Put the stupid laboratory studies on attractive facial features away and watch REAL PEOPLE. This is not a lab experiment, this is LIFE. There is no manual. You make it up as you go. (not to say their aren't cultural ideas that people draw on as they make it up) Moimeme has made some excellent points on this board; read them again. Also, read the other responses, notice how those that gave you physical descriptors gave you all different ones, and notice how many women emphasized attributes other than looks. They are NOT lying to make themselves appear less superficial. These are women telling you the GOD'S HONEST TRUTH that looks are not the be-all-and-end-all of attraction. I'm still wondering about the answer to Moimeme's question: what are you planning on using this information for?
Tamed Wildflower Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 I'm not sure if you have seen my general theory of female vs. male attraction in your "Changing Yourself" thread, but I honestly think that is usually the way it works. [in brief, for women, physical attraction itself is based on the interpersonal relationship or vibe that the two people have between them, or at least based on her general impression of him. For most women, "mere" physical attraction is rarely mere physical attraction ] If it helps, let me describe a few guys I have been attracted to, my point being 1) there is no univeral ideal that holds true for all women; 2) there is no ideal that holds true for one woman all the time. [this exercise illustrates #2 more directly, but #1 is kind of a pre-requisite to #2) Guys I have been attracted to: 1) 5'10"-ish, white guy long curly blond hair tied back in a pony-tail blue eyes thick frame/ husky 2) 6'3" or so, black guy extremely skinny hair style varied when I knew him (bald, short fro, poofy fro, cornrows, poofy fro again) very stylish dresser 3) 5'7" or so, Arab guy dark hair, regular standard male haircut dark eyes medium build 4) 6", light-skinned guy (didn't identify as white; identified as Latino, but since we are talking about looks I will just say light-skinned, but of a hue that appeared somewhat tanned, or at least "tanned" to a person as pale as me! --but it wasn't a "tan" that he needed the sun for, it was his natural color.) gorgeous medium brown eyes very strong muscular build brown hair, standard male haircut, hairline beginning to recede 5) 5'11" white guy medium brown eyes out-of-style glasses brown hair held back in a pony-tail, hairline that seems to recede more by the month (the more forehead for me to kiss, I say!!) tummy that sticks out slightly legs so long he looks funny when he walks very small hands 6) about 6' tall, white guy longish dark brown hair, pulled back in pony-tail, receding hair-line very tall, skinny, and lanky blazing blue eyes large hands with long fingers 7) about 5'10" or 5'11", white guy dark hair, with some natural reddish tones to it beady little eyes that scrunch when he smiles big nose a chubby tummy (it's cute and cuddly!) very small hands 8) I don't remember how tall this guy was causcasion, but somewhat tanned-looking skin beautiful blue eyes blonde hair, very close buzz cut very thin wore comfy sweaters in earth tones that suggested warmth to me Do you see how much the physical attributes that one woman finds attractive can vary??? And in all of these cases, my attraction was based only somewhat on the way these men look, and even my perception of the way they looked was based on the vibe they gave off, their mannerisms, their sense of humor, and my general impression of them as people. (All except one were really wonderful people, and with the one that wasn't, I stopped being attracted to him when I realized that.) What do you think of this, Nomad? What do the other women think about this? (About idea that physical attraction is often based on other things.)
HotCaliGirl Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 Linlin wrote: nice a$$ I must be in the minority on this but I've never cared much about a guy's a$$. That said, it's so hard to pick a feature since a good personality always overshadows any features that are not all that. I do however think that cleanlines, good hygiene and grooming are attractive features/musts, as are good teeth... I've been attracted to men who I've thought I wouldn't be, yet they have at some point been my "type." Whereas a man can be into ONLY a brunette or thin type or this or that type, women are more complex on these things and more open and attracted to a variety of combinations of features in men since they are more about the inside than the physical features, so it is difficult to even hypothetize/pretend on this issue, as it is for men who are visually attracted to others, to comprehend/accept this... So to answer your question, the vast majority of women do not find physical features on their own attractive, but only in relation to the holder of them and the personality associated with its carrier. We don't have the equivelent of the hot dumb bimbo who we like to get off on. Ewww. Ok, at least I don't, I won't speak for those who do. On a related note, to me, it is the size of the brain that matters and attracts .
Tamed Wildflower Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 Originally posted by HotCaliGirl I've been attracted to men who I've thought I wouldn't be, yet they have at some point been my "type." Whereas a man can be into ONLY a brunette or thin type or this or that type, women are more complex on these things and more open and attracted to a variety of combinations of features in men since they are more about the inside than the physical features, so it is difficult to even hypothetize/pretend on this issue, as it is for men who are visually attracted to others, to comprehend/accept this... So to answer your question, the vast majority of women do not find physical features on their own attractive, but only in relation to the holder of them and the personality associated with its carrier. We don't have the equivelent of the hot dumb bimbo who we like to get off on. Ewww. Ok, at least I don't, I won't speak for those who do. Exactly my point, HotCaliGirl. Well said! Nomad, do you believe us now??? That physical attributes alone mean nothing?
ReluctantRomeo Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 Originally posted by Tamed Wildflower And in all of these cases, my attraction was based only somewhat on the way these men look, and even my perception of the way they looked was based on the vibe they gave off, their mannerisms, their sense of humor, and my general impression of them as people. (All except one were really wonderful people, and with the one that wasn't, I stopped being attracted to him when I realized that.) What do you think of this, Nomad? What do the other women think about this? (About idea that physical attraction is often based on other things.) For sure. Even for guys, all of us have at least once had the experience where a girl becomes way more attractive once you get to know something about her. And at least one experience of the opposite, too
KissMyTiara Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 Here's my two cents: 6' or taller Caucasian, but tan-able, not uber-white Broad shoulders Thick chest, arm (including the forearm), and shoulder muscles Short, short hair Strong jawline Good teeth
alicia24 Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 The picture I have posted on my avatar is perfection, in my opinion. Being thick in the pants is always nice too.
Tamed Wildflower Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 Originally posted by alicia24 The picture I have posted on my avatar is perfection, in my opinion. Being thick in the pants is always nice too. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Alicia, I would NEVER think to look twice at that guy!!
Tamed Wildflower Posted April 13, 2005 Posted April 13, 2005 Originally posted by alicia24 Well , in my eyes he is gorgeous. And that is an entirely valid perspective. I guess I just proved my point again: different strokes for different folks!!
exotic_virgin Posted January 7, 2006 Posted January 7, 2006 As women who cares about a mans attractiveness as well as personality... I will say one thing... I dont care if a guy is tall or short... Or facial features... Things that makes a man attractive is a good physyic... Not the arnold type... Just a person who looks after them self... Cause then you are also healther in your mind... Great teath... And great skin... All acomplishable... The rest is to do with how a guy treats me... Now this is very dependent depending on the individual... ANd as quoted before... People like others for different reasons.... Some like to teach... Some like to be tought... Some like to posses... Some like freedom... SOme like a challenge... SOme like easy.... Interesting question... One must say...
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