Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted March 2, 2015 Posted March 2, 2015 One of those questions are okay providing you use it as a platform for a conversation! You have to give the asker something to go on.. "What's your favourite colour?" "green" ^ Sucks "What's your favourite colour?" "Green, not too dark, not too light, like fresh mown grass green. Always reminds me of playing out in the fields as a kid while my old man was on the tractor!" "You grew up in the country then?" "Yeah, don't think I could do city living, all feels a bit hectic and claustrophobic - I like to be able to see the sea and the fields." "I feel absolutely the same, I love to be near the sea, I went to uni in the city and...... " etc etc etc ^ I'm having a better conversation with myself right now than you apparently had on your date! Bingo. If a girl is only answering my questions and not sustaining conversation, it's going to be a short date. Likewise i'll try to do the same. 2
Author Christina107 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Posted March 2, 2015 One of those questions are okay providing you use it as a platform for a conversation! You have to give the asker something to go on.. "What's your favourite colour?" "green" ^ Sucks "What's your favourite colour?" "Green, not too dark, not too light, like fresh mown grass green. Always reminds me of playing out in the fields as a kid while my old man was on the tractor!" "You grew up in the country then?" "Yeah, don't think I could do city living, all feels a bit hectic and claustrophobic - I like to be able to see the sea and the fields." "I feel absolutely the same, I love to be near the sea, I went to uni in the city and...... " etc etc etc ^ I'm having a better conversation with myself right now than you apparently had on your date! Now I see what my problem is! He asked me a question and I just gave an answer without going into anything deeper. Thanks guys for the advice. 2
rester Posted March 2, 2015 Posted March 2, 2015 I don't like to discuss anything about my family, living arrangements or where I went to school. Yeah, I do prefer having the conversation just flow...those kind of personal questions are just too personal for the first date. I just think those questions are kind of stalkerish. These are typical things to talk about with new people, whether it's at a party or on a first date or getting to know new coworkers. You don't have to go deep into personal territory, but having some things to say about each of these topics is good to have in your head. If you don't like talking about them, it's an even better idea to have some answers in your head in order to move the conversation onward. I don't know what his deal was. I asked him those same questions back. I even asked him about the upcoming basketball game that was coming up and then he focused his attention back on me and preferred to talk about my coat! And then he started bitchin about how "he was doing all the talking" when I was asking him quite a few questions about himself...so what gives??? And I was telling him about my past experiences in school, my job, my friends, my dating life, okcupid....this annoys me when my dates start saying they are doing all the talking when I'm making an effort in asking questions and getting to know them! This sounds like a bad date more than anything. Could be that you two didn't "click" well. He was an ass for bitchin about how he was doing all the talking. That's rude. Now I see what my problem is! He asked me a question and I just gave an answer without going into anything deeper. Thanks guys for the advice. I think it's great you realized this now and can make adjustments to your conversation style. It'll only help in the future. No offense, but you make it sound like a job interview instead of a date? It's *suppose* to be a little goofy and playful. I *hate* super serious first dates. Where's the fun. The comfortable back and forth. Surely people are allowed to ask a few odd ball questions just to break the ice and get things flowing. I'm not exactly going to open with, "So, what are your thoughts on Russia's overt efforts to reclaim the Ukraine?" Off-topic, but FWIW, the best job interviews are the ones that have a comfortable back and forth, as well. If things are too stiff, it can be a precursor to personality conflicts. 1
neowulf Posted March 2, 2015 Posted March 2, 2015 Off-topic, but FWIW, the best job interviews are the ones that have a comfortable back and forth, as well. If things are too stiff, it can be a precursor to personality conflicts. That's actually a great point. Not the best metaphor I admit, but most people have had to endure a "tough, no nonsense" job interview at least once 1
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