Author blind_otter Posted April 7, 2005 Author Posted April 7, 2005 Originally posted by prisoner let's get one thing straight. it is about respect, not romance. being yourself, having a life, being independent and normal make women more attractive. men who want women who are fake and need them all the time and don't have a life and are weird for no reason are losers themselves. What merin describes is closer to normal life and not the chase. secondly, i would like to represent for all of the men who know when a woman is interested and do something about it other than fall over themselves. neanderthals can speak for themselves. women can share enough information about how they feel without throwing themselves headfirst in to a man they met once three months ago. wouldn't it be mildly refreshing to actually get to know someone? see what they are like in varying situations? enjoy them on a number of levels before freaking out at how fast ehy do or do not move? the chase used to be an art. you make it sound like a chore. meet someone. have a drink. get the digits. make the call. have another drink or three. kiss goodnight. the call the next day. the dinner. the dessert somewhere else. the late night drink. the call the next day. the invite. the friday night in. the saturday morning walk. the first breakfast. the whole day together. the first fight. the fire. the court dates. the restarining orders. the fight. the lawsuit. the dismissal. the trial. the subpoenas. the exes testifying. the probation. the therapy. isn't that what it is all about? It may be the low pressure system rolling in talking, making me more bitchy than usual. But I find your post to be unnecessarily obtuse. If not obtuse, I think it might just be offensive. WTF is normal, pray tell? I have yet to meet, talk to, or read about someone who is "normal" and there is no clearly definitive definition of what normal is, in psychology or in reality. Is it the common denominator? What you find appropriate? Some people meet and get married after 2 months and are together for the rest of their lives. Some people meet and work together for 3 years before they suddenly realize they are in love, and then they get divorced. Who's to tell?
Linlin Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 being yourself, having a life, being independent and normal make women more attractive. secondly, i would like to represent for all of the men who know when a woman is interested and do something about it other than fall over themselves. B_O I agree with you. Firstly, I am successful and independent. That doesn't mean automatically that the boys come running. Sometimes I think that they are afraid of it. My ex hated the fact that I was more successful than him. That was part of our downfall. Secondly, with the new guy, I sent two emails. Let him know where I am going to be on Friday. Said he was welcome to come by. Do I need to hit him over the head with a club?
prisoner Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 normal: usual and typical. what you would expect. there is no normal. being yourself is the important thing. if you like to be chased then keep putting distance between you and someone and if they continue to pursue it is working and if they do not then you may have to do some of the work. I just found the whole thread obtuse. In this day and age of instant everything I found it strange that there were so many opinions about something relatively intangible. and the point at the end was simply no matter what happens at the beginning there is no controlling what happens at the end and that is the point of the chase. enjoy it while it is fun. clear?
prisoner Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 LinLIN: you have done what you needed to. see what happens next. being independent: IMO it makes you more attractive. Otter: there is no way of telling what will work and what won't. I think there is an opportunity to get to know someone and then there is the rest IF there is supposed to be. If the effort is made. If there is more than just people walking in to each other.
Author blind_otter Posted April 7, 2005 Author Posted April 7, 2005 Originally posted by prisoner clear? Unless you are a pseud for a regular poster you wouldn't know this, but I actually did have an ex go crazy, had to get a restraining order, he violated it and tried to kill one of my friends, and he is awaiting trial for, among other things, burglary with battery, and going away for 10 years in prison; I did get a subpoena to give a statement to the state attorney's office, and did make a statement, and will have to be a witness if he doesn't take the plea bargain. So I was ruffled when you mentioned this.
prisoner Posted April 7, 2005 Posted April 7, 2005 ruffled is fine. how could i have known? i walked around the corner one night and knew the ex was back. the firetruck told me so. it is the hardest thing in the world to know if someone is who they say they are. I was just trying to make a point. random is an understatement. meta random is not a word.
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