rollercoaster11 Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 We are always remembering the bad about our exs but I thought that it would be different to say what was something good that they did for you..not material wise. Afterall we did love them at one time. 1. He encouraged me to go back to school for a college degree. 2. He always was telling me to believe in myself and that Im beautiful inside and out and no I didn't think that about myself because I was extremely shy and I didn't think I was beautiful. 3. I learned to not take life so seriously....he always quoted these different sayings about life...which sometimes drove me crazy but there was a lesson in each one of them. On a lighter side..he was the best kisser that I ever had...when he would kiss me it was so passionate and strong...you definitely knew that you had been kissed. 2
badpenny Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 Sadly, the good things faded; by the time we split, they were wholly overshadowed by a less pleasant side that sadly, made them virtually insignificant.
Auspecial Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 He remembered details about things I told him. He sought my approval on minor things he was doing. He reached out to me when something was wrong. He was good with lively, intelligent conversations.
Ruby65 Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 He was the best cheater I ever met! Seriously, I never had a clue. He was gifted! We are always remembering the bad about our exs but I thought that it would be different to say what was something good that they did for you..not material wise. Afterall we did love them at one time. 1. He encouraged me to go back to school for a college degree. 2. He always was telling me to believe in myself and that Im beautiful inside and out and no I didn't think that about myself because I was extremely shy and I didn't think I was beautiful. 3. I learned to not take life so seriously....he always quoted these different sayings about life...which sometimes drove me crazy but there was a lesson in each one of them. On a lighter side..he was the best kisser that I ever had...when he would kiss me it was so passionate and strong...you definitely knew that you had been kissed. Sweetie, there are WAY better kissers out there -- and frankly, nothing you list seems very exotic or unique. These are just the standard things people do and say when involved in a committed relationship. Believe in yourself.... you're beautiful inside and out.... you can read that in any Hallmark card! Don't worry about not appreciating your ex enough! He DUMPED YOU. Knock his sorry butt off that pedestal and recognize him for what he really is: a guy who was too lame to appreciate YOU. Focus instead on healing and finding someone who will treat you way way better than he did. 1
d0nnivain Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 Of the important EXs I liked their intelligence and senses of humor. All were quite clever. DH also has a good sense of humor & is very intelligent. Those qualities are important to me so they carry though my relationships.
Michelle ma Belle Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 Refreshing I'm all about trying to focus on the positives rather than wallow too long in negatives so I appreciate this post very much. When you're a believer that everything happens for a reason it's hard NOT to see how each and every relationship molded you in some positive way even if it was tiny. I also think that sometimes we meet people not for just our benefit but sometimes for theirs. We're meant to change their lives in some way, hopefully it's a positive one. Regarding my ex's, there are lots of wonderful things about each of them otherwise I wouldn't have been with them in the first place. They were all different yet the same in many ways. I'm grateful for every single one of them, good and not so good. I am the woman I am today because of those relationships and I think she's pretty damn fine :D 1
kendahke Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 Teaching me what never ever to settle for in a man in the future.
Always Pondering Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 One of my exes made the best grilled cheese sandwiches ever. They tasted the best that I've ever had in my entire life. I have to say I'm getting hungry just thinking about them now. I miss those, no doubt about that. 1
Toodaloo Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 The most recent ex I have realised that the things I "liked" were actually things I was imagining to have such as being supportive, caring etc. So no I don't miss him. I miss the "thought" of the loving partner. My drunk ex I miss, as he was so hard working and was really motivated and loved doing things. As far as emotions went he was a complete philistine but if I ever needed a hug he would give me one and not question it. If I ever needed to cry he didn't try and "fix" me just accepted it and let me get on with it. he would ask what he could do to help and then do it. Sadly it was all marred by a hangover or he was drunk but hey ho. I wish he hadn't drunk quite so very much. Older man used to do things like opening doors and we used to laugh a lot. He had a very silly and naughty sense of humour that no one else saw. When we spoke the other day he referred to not being able to just "be himself" the way he was with me any more. I kind of understand but at the same time felt pity for him that he has been putting on a face again. The various short term relationships I had at college I miss them more because they were actually superb friends. But what the heck. I still get to see them at the reunions every 5-10 years, we are incontact via jungle drums and facebook so its all good.
carhill Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 Things you liked about your ex 1. She's (or was during our M) an inspired cook and we fit well together in the kitchen and, generally, had a lot of fun there. 2. She was rarely to never not up for lovemaking. 3. I think we both agreed, even after getting a divorce, that we were good travel partners, and we certainly saw a lot of the world while married. If I go back to the ex prior to my exW, I'd have to say there was a lot I liked about her and, had she not lived over 6,000 miles away we'd probably have been married. Standouts in my mind include: 1. Very feminine even though she worked as a trauma doctor. 2. Very traditional about male and female roles in a family unit. My attempts to blend male and female roles were met with 'nyet!' and a smattering of Ukrainian expletives. 3. Great kisser. Oddly, she expressed a sort of dismorphia about her lips; my best analogy was they were a lot like Angelina Jolie's and whoa, not bad for a grandma. Both women demonstrated a lack of drama.
Stercrazy Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 Epic at oral Awesome cook......fast too. Excellent at organizing rooms. Great Mom to her kids and was very nice to mine.
TigerCub Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 He used to get/give Simpson's references (we'd joke the same). He was a romantic and a good gift giver He knew my spots and did something that no other man can do as well.
Kevin_D Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 I loved everything about her... before she turned into a monster that is. She fulfilled all my dreams. She was everything I ever wanted. Everything when I went to sleep, I said to myself "Things may go wrong, but at least you've found the girl of your dreams". Yep. It's true. I've read old chat logs with my friends and I said the same thing while were together as well. Basically this has ruined my life. My expectations are far too high. Nothing will ever compare with what we had. She is the hottest girl I've ever seen. She was a virgin when we met, yet she was crazy in bed. And she was talented, an amazing artist. She even had green eyes, just like I hade dreamt about since I was a little kid. And ridiculously loyal, until she flipped and devalued me that is. My life will never be the same again. The fairytale is ruined for good.
Chi townD Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 Things I liked about my Ex. Hmmmm... Her leaving. Does that count? 2
CrystalShine2011 Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 He was an amazingly caring man. Always looked out for me and could interpret my feelings. He was also very giving, and loving. The sex was great too. I just wasn't right for him! It's too bad, he deserves someone wonderful.
alphamale Posted February 26, 2015 Posted February 26, 2015 Ukrainian expletives. the Ukrains certainly have their fair share of swear words
carhill Posted February 27, 2015 Posted February 27, 2015 the Ukrains certainly have their fair share of swear words Ha, ha, my interpreter was blushing and she was used to interpreting for business people and government officials in heated negotiations. Ukrainian women can be pretty passionate, especially about their kitchen! Perhaps that was part of why I liked her, that she could be passionate about things without being a drama queen. As fast as it came, it was gone and back to balance and those type of things were rare. That was when we were first getting to know each other prior to any intimacy or sex, and when when my Ukrainian/Russian was немного (a little).
darkbloom Posted February 27, 2015 Posted February 27, 2015 Things I liked about him: 1. Thoughtful. Would take extra time to figure out how to make something special or do something nice for me without being asked. 2. Great kisser. 3. Great gift giver. Would give gifts just because. 4. His family. (He can't really take credit for this but still.) 5. Listened to me complain about my coworkers and always offered help. I realize that's a pretty sad list. Since I can list way more in the things I don't like about him category. The heart isn't that good at identifying someone who is good for us.
Stercrazy Posted February 27, 2015 Posted February 27, 2015 The heart isn't that good at identifying someone who is good for us. Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd that's why we're all here.
darkbloom Posted February 27, 2015 Posted February 27, 2015 Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd that's why we're all here. If I could have my heart removed, I would.
KatZee Posted February 27, 2015 Posted February 27, 2015 Things I liked about my Ex. Hmmmm... Her leaving. Does that count? Likewise. I'm struggling here. I really am. I really can't think of one redeeming quality that my ex has. Not even one.
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