eblude Posted February 24, 2015 Posted February 24, 2015 As I mentioned in other post my wife left 5 months ago and filed for divorce and restraining order took all cash and left me sinking. I have a divorce date coming and i feel all wounds are opening . Yesterday I was driving and all hitting my mind is driving as fast as I can and hit a pole bridge "as long none else hurts" and let my body shatter in million pieces. I know it might take time but what is the point? fall in love again get betrayed and get my heart shattered again . being called abusive , blamed each morning and never been appreciated. I know sounds like a rant but . my life consist of work home . sleep and that's it . I am so lonely No friends family .. all left home for my wife. I cannot go home since economy sucks and other some issues. beside i know going home wont solve nothing . 2 days ago I had heart problem and I blacked out .. strange thing at that moment I prayed lord to take me away but he did not .. if it is not for my 2 dogs I Would have thought more seriously of ending my life in crazy way. People here say things will go better. NOT SURE things were going bad each month something going wrong: 2 car accident "been rear ended" and someone hit my car at parking lot and ran, might be kicked out of house, broke and pressure from work. Beside the cold winter in Maine and snow piling makes me feel trapped home. I am trying to write it maybe stop hearing voices saying am a loser wont never be happy and need to give up. Part of me want to give my ex wife everything at court .. all cash i have dogs and everything and declare surrender to this life .. I am fighting it but not sure for how long blessing light
anika99 Posted February 24, 2015 Posted February 24, 2015 I know that when things feel this bad there is nothing anyone can say in the moment to make the pain go away but it really is true that if you hang in there and weather this storm this things will get better. 1
ApexTitanium Posted February 25, 2015 Posted February 25, 2015 Keep your head up man, we are here for you. I get those thoughts a lot....my fiance left me out of nowhere, a year after I maxed out two credit cards and a loan to buy the ring she wanted....that I could barely afford. Five and a half years together and I was thrown out like trash. I know my situation doesn't compare to yours as heavily but I feel the exact same as you do. We just have to dig deep and keep pushing forward.
LoveMyCat Posted February 25, 2015 Posted February 25, 2015 Things will get better...don't allow one woman's actions sour you forever. You do not need to jump into a new relationship right away, but there ARE good, honest people of both sexes out there. Take comfort from your pets...and do things that relax you. Try not to do things you don't like for a while, i.e just to please others. Be a little selfish with your time, spend it how you like. And eat well. Take care of yourself.
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