B-Eazy Posted February 24, 2015 Posted February 24, 2015 Okay so my girlfriend of 6 years broke up with June of last year. She didn't not reach out to me until November and sent me a text saying how she dosen't hate me and hopes we can be friends one day. We then no longer contact each other until she randomly text me one night while I was out drinking I convinced her to come pick me up. It was so nice to see her and catch up she took me back to my place at which we ended up having sex. After that we agreed we could be friends but no longer have sex. She then called me one night while I was drunk and the conversation was going good until she mentions another guy it just erks me and I get upset we got into it then left the phone on bad terms. I then called her the next day and apologized and blamed what I said on the alcohol I was tryimg to convince her and myself I'm over if and able to to just be friends with no jealously. She agreed to go take a drive and we sat and talked for hours it was great. She told me she had a date later that night which he ended up rescheduling it. We hung out for a bit and I took her home and left on good terms. We agreed to go see a movie the following Wednesday which ended up in us having sex again. She left the next morning and evening was fine we agreed we are just friends. I texted her that Saturday while I was drinking and made the mistake of telling her I missed her. She said it's just because Im lonely and I'm comfortable with her. She then goes cold on me and a few days later says she really likes this guy she's talking to and she's confused and we need to slow everything down and maybe just go to lunch every once and awhile. To which I replied you need to do what you need to do. I then go out on Valentine's day and run into her and her gilfriend we had a good time for most of the night then as soon as she mentioned another guy I went off again while I was drunk and told her I can't be her friend I can't stand to see her with another guy and this was it our final goodbye and she said it's going to be awkward if we see eachother I said we can be like passing ships. And she says that's what's you want and I explained its not what I want it's how it's supposed to be. I have not contacted her since. I'm conflicted because I feel like if I am her friend I can always be there in the back of my mind and maybe we could one day be together. But I feel too disrespected that she is interested in another guy and is able to just flip her emotions off of me when we were hot and heavy a week earlier. I don't understnd why she wanted to be my friend so bad I think it's because she wants me on the back burner just in case all else fails. I'm not going to be plan B even though as much as it hurts and now I'm feeling a lot of emotions I felt at beginning of heart break and all I can think about is her and that other guy and what's going on even though at this point I should not care. I want to know am I making the right decision to not be her friend and cut all ties. And what advice for me to move on and not care anymore would be greatly appreciated.
quattrob Posted February 24, 2015 Posted February 24, 2015 Firstly you shouldn't lie to yourself or her that all you wanted is friendship and that you are over her. You clearly are not and you are not ready to be friends with her. You can blame her for going hot on you and then the next week cold, at least she was honest with you that she was dating this guy she really likes and only wants to be friends with you. However when you got mad and upset whenever she mentions this guy, you lied to her that it's because of the alcohol and that you're sorry for that. It's time for you to be honest with yourself, friendship with her is not going to work, at least not in your current state. Go back into NC and if she does look for you, it's time you be honest with her about your feelings and you move on. The longer you hold on to this false hope, the more hurt you'll be in. She has told you she really likes this other guy so leave her be. You are not the one she wants to be with. I know it's harsh but you need to accept that fact.
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