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What is the worst **** test you've had to deal with from a woman?

luvsux69

By luvsux69
in General Relationship Discussion

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toolforgrowth Established Member

toolforgrowth

Posted
Posted (edited)
Sincerely, I was hoping to figure out what this (****) meant after someone posted...

 

how does a fitness test mean **** ?

And what does it have to do with cheating??

 

... and how did YOU, toolforgrowth, know this (****) was for fitness?!

:confused:

 

CiH*

 

$h!t test. I've heard of that term many times in the past, and I've done my research.

 

EDIT: another term for it is fitness test. It's when a woman tests a man's fitness to be her partner by purposefully doing something out of line. Will he stand up to her? Will he put a stop to it? In other words, is he a strong man or is he a doormat?

 

It's the silliest thing ever, but it happens...a LOT.

Edited by toolforgrowth
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ComingInHot Established Member

ComingInHot

Posted
Posted
$h!t test. I've heard of that term many times in the past, and I've done my research.

 

EDIT: another term for it is fitness test. It's when a woman tests a man's fitness to be her partner by purposefully doing something out of line. Will he stand up to her? Will he put a stop to it? In other words, is he a strong man or is he a doormat?

 

It's the silliest thing ever, but it happens...a LOT.

 

Thank you and I do understand now :)

 

I think with my history, I don't do this for obvious reasons. There are plenty other ways I can get someone to prove their 'masculinity ' and none of them involves inappropriate behavior, fighting or cheating. ;)

 

I think I'd really rather test bowel movements than cause a fight...

CiH*

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gaius Established Member

gaius

Posted
Posted
Bahston- How you guys doin' up there? I miss Bahston, not now I guess. Sis is in Newton.

Filorida is a balmy 60 :p Anyone killed each other for parking yet? Memories..

Enjoy it while it lasts, you'll be underwater soon with the rising ocean levels. :p I actually grew up right next door to Newton, and no deaths yet from what I hear but a decent amount of property damage. The attempted ban on space savers isn't working out all that well this winter.

 

A **** test is basically a woman deliberately disrespecting you to check your reaction for strength. I don't think asking for a favor counts, most of the time. If you fail she loses interest, if you pass she gets more interested.

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Got it Established Member

Got it

Posted
Posted

Okay . . . . maybe when I was a teen and believed relationships were supposed to be like soap operas and romantic comedies, but now? Good no. I don't play games, I cut to the chase.

 

That sounds exhausting! Lol, if I did that my husband would drop me faster than I could say sh&t. :laugh:

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Under The Radar Established Member

Under The Radar

Posted
Posted
It's subconscious. All women do it.

 

Both women AND men can do it, but no ...... not everyone **** Tests.

 

It's also not isolated to only romantic relationships ...... as well, I've seen it in strictly platonic relationships of either gender.

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xxoo Established Member

xxoo

Posted
Posted
Both women AND men can do it, but no ...... not everyone **** Tests.

 

It's also not isolated to only romantic relationships ...... as well, I've seen it in strictly platonic relationships of either gender.

 

I agree with this.

 

Also, I think there is an element of reading too much into things at times. A bad mood and imperfect behavior needn't be about "testing" you. It just could be poor behavior based on poor coping. Doesn't mean that you need to tolerate it, just don't assume that it's about you.

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Priv Established Member

Priv

Posted
Posted

If he/she does it, just spank their ass so hard they are not able to sit right for a week. It is win-win :D

 

 

Incidentally, doing that you pretty much pass the test anyway...

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ComingInHot Established Member

ComingInHot

Posted
Posted
If he/she does it, just spank their ass so hard they are not able to sit right for a week. It is win-win :D

 

 

Incidentally, doing that you pretty much pass the test anyway...

 

Aahahahahaha!! :D

CiH*

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xxoo Established Member

xxoo

Posted
Posted
If he/she does it, just spank their ass so hard they are not able to sit right for a week. It is win-win :D

 

 

Incidentally, doing that you pretty much pass the test anyway...

 

As long as all consensual, not a bad idea!

 

And what can I do when my man gets snippy for no reason? (actually, I have some ideas :laugh:)

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insert_name Established Member

insert_name

Posted
Posted

I agree that its most likely sub conscious. I think a lot of the relationship issues on here stem from women testing men without realising that they are doing it- mainly in the form of challenging their boyfriend by bringing another man into the situation to see how he deals with it. Some of the ways women overstep boundaries with regards to male friends and then claim innocence makes my mind boggle. It does seem like they want to give their boyfriend a decision to make at times.

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StanMusial Established Member

StanMusial

Posted
Posted
I agree that its most likely sub conscious. I think a lot of the relationship issues on here stem from women testing men without realising that they are doing it- mainly in the form of challenging their boyfriend by bringing another man into the situation to see how he deals with it. Some of the ways women overstep boundaries with regards to male friends and then claim innocence makes my mind boggle. It does seem like they want to give their boyfriend a decision to make at times.

 

Yeah, I had one gf for a while that would do this sort of thing... A short while, as it were.

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autumnnight Established Member

autumnnight

Posted
Posted
It's subconscious. All women do it.

 

Wrong again, psychic.

 

It makes me chuckle how men think they can speak for all women.

 

I will confess that I gave my ex a few of them....but that was after years of him claiming he never did X or Y that would hurt me or drive me crazy. So eventually I would just watch and see when he would do it, and then try to point it out. That was dumb, though, because all it did was put him on the defensive and make me look patty. So instead of waiting for him to blameshift or get passive aggressive, I just gave up.

 

There are absolutely women who test man. I have heard some talk about it. But we do NOT all do it.

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serial muse Established Member

serial muse

Posted
Posted
Wrong again, psychic.

 

It makes me chuckle how men think they can speak for all women.

 

I will confess that I gave my ex a few of them....but that was after years of him claiming he never did X or Y that would hurt me or drive me crazy. So eventually I would just watch and see when he would do it, and then try to point it out. That was dumb, though, because all it did was put him on the defensive and make me look patty. So instead of waiting for him to blameshift or get passive aggressive, I just gave up.

 

There are absolutely women who test man. I have heard some talk about it. But we do NOT all do it.

 

Maybe I'm not entirely understanding this, but I wouldn't call what you did a shxt-test. It sounds more like the kind of passive-aggressive stuff people do to one another when they've been together a while and have buried resentments and unresolved issues. Every human being on the planet - yes, guys, you too - has done that sort of thing, and if they say they haven't, they're lying. :p

 

But that's not the same thing at all as testing someone's boundaries just to see what you can get away with, which is what I understand a shxt test to be, from this thread. That stereotype seems to be tainted with the flavor of a cat playing with a toy. Well, I'm a woman, and no, I've never done anything of the kind (e.g. flirted with another guy in front of the man I'm with, tried to make him jealous, tried to rile him up just 'cause, etc.). I've certainly done passive-aggressive crap in an established relationship, like all humans, but I've never tested someone just to test him and see how far he'd let me go.

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rester Established Member

rester

Posted
Posted
Wrong again, psychic.

 

It makes me chuckle how men think they can speak for all women.

 

I will confess that I gave my ex a few of them....but that was after years of him claiming he never did X or Y that would hurt me or drive me crazy. So eventually I would just watch and see when he would do it, and then try to point it out. That was dumb, though, because all it did was put him on the defensive and make me look patty. So instead of waiting for him to blameshift or get passive aggressive, I just gave up.

 

There are absolutely women who test man. I have heard some talk about it. But we do NOT all do it.

 

The way I always understood it, is that shlt testing in a general sense is just another name for testing a partner's boundaries. In that sense, everyone does it, consciously or not, man or woman. It's part of getting to know someone and is on-going in a relationship.

 

The more specific shlt tests that PUAs talk about are things like women telling a man to buy her a drink. The theory is that she's purposely testing you to see if you're a door mat or not and will buy her a drink.

 

The oversimplified solution to all of this, for both men and women, is to not be a door mat to anybody.

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ComingInHot Established Member

ComingInHot

Posted
Posted

Can someone please tell me why it is called 'sh*t test' for pete's sake?!!? :p

 

I would really like to know what person came up with a test name like that? :bunny:

CiH*

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Frank2thepoint Established Member

Frank2thepoint

Posted
Posted

I had an ex do a sh*t test on me. We were visiting her family, and we were heading out to a restaurant with her cousin and her cousin's husband. Her cousin's husband was telling his wife to wear heels, she didn't want to, but she relented for her husband. I didn't witness this or knew about it until later, but my girlfriend comes to me and asks me what should she wear on her feet. Heels or flats? I just said whatever feels comfortable for her. She tells me it was a good answer and tells me about what just transpired between her cousin and her cousin's husband.

 

 

a s h i t test is when a girl purposely makes you mad and puts you through a tough time, example flirts with another guy, or allows another guy to flirt with her or goes to a dinner with another guy and says hes just a friend and says that you are too jealous... etc.

 

You call this a sh*t test, I call this a low quality girl.

 

 

I guess I don't really get the causing a fight thing. I absolutely Loathe fighting with the man I love.

I do understand wanting him to want to protect and love me. I just don't see how fighting and cheating is going to help the relationship.

 

...possibly not the best thread for me to be commenting on I think :(

 

It's good you are commenting, especially commenting positively. Obviously some men, like the OP, needs to know not all women are evil sh*t testers.

  • Like 4
preraph Established Member

preraph

Posted
Posted

It's something guys made up that doesn't exist to exempt them from having to take any responsibility for how a relationship is going by classifying everything challenging a woman does as unfounded and irrational.

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xxoo Established Member

xxoo

Posted
Posted

I beginning to conclude that interpreting interactions as **** tests is failing the ultimate **** test.

  • Like 2
Woggle Established Member

Woggle

Posted
Posted
It's something guys made up that doesn't exist to exempt them from having to take any responsibility for how a relationship is going by classifying everything challenging a woman does as unfounded and irrational.

 

I haven't heard the term offline but myself and others guys have dealt with arguments that just pop up out of nowhere for no good reason. I don't know what to call them guys need to not let themselves get caught up in these games.

  • Like 2
xxoo Established Member

xxoo

Posted
Posted
I haven't heard the term offline but myself and others guys have dealt with arguments that just pop up out of nowhere for no good reason. I don't know what to call them guys need to not let themselves get caught up in these games.

 

When men start arguments out of nowhere, what is that attributed to?

 

Usually stress, resentment, or some other personal issue.

 

Women are the same.

 

How to handle it? Like an adult. Boundaries and compassion go a long way, as does communication to uncover the source of the snippiness.

  • Like 5
Woggle Established Member

Woggle

Posted
Posted
When men start arguments out of nowhere, what is that attributed to?

 

Usually stress, resentment, or some other personal issue.

 

Women are the same.

 

How to handle it? Like an adult. Boundaries and compassion go a long way, as does communication to uncover the source of the snippiness.

 

Women shouldn't put up with it either.

  • Like 5
serial muse Established Member

serial muse

Posted
Posted
Can someone please tell me why it is called 'sh*t test' for pete's sake?!!? :p

 

I would really like to know what person came up with a test name like that? :bunny:

CiH*

 

I think it has to do with testing how much of someone's shxt the other person will take before throwing in the towel.

  • Like 3
ComingInHot Established Member

ComingInHot

Posted
Posted
I think it has to do with testing how much of someone's shxt the other person will take before throwing in the towel.

 

aaAAAAHHHhhhhhh, gotcha.

 

And thank you, I do tend to not 'get it' as quickly as some. You don't even want to know what I thought 'dp' was for the longest time... :o

sheesh.

CiH*

  • Like 2
BlueIris Established Member

BlueIris

Posted
Posted
When men start arguments out of nowhere, what is that attributed to?

 

Usually stress, resentment, or some other personal issue.

 

Women are the same.

 

How to handle it? Like an adult. Boundaries and compassion go a long way, as does communication to uncover the source of the snippiness.

 

Yep. The key word is argument. If someone starts picking at you or is in a pissy mood, ask him or her what's going on, what they're upset about, instead of arguing. Arguing takes two. It requires reciprocation. There are people whose mode of interaction is arguing, but they don't have the compassion or caring you're talking about. I'd kind of think that chronic-arguers are always running **** tests! :laugh:

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Rejected Rosebud Established Member

Rejected Rosebud

Posted
Posted

I think if you find yourself wit a person who is trying on purpose to manipulate you or push your buttons to get some kind of a rise out of you you should probably bail quickly but I don't think this is some kind of female conspiracy for heaven's sake!! Just behavior probably attributable to really young kids or super messed up people you should not be involved with anyway!!

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