acuriousman99 Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 I always see people asking if ugly people can get girlfriends. So I decided to test it out. I am an ugly man listing my past 50 attempts at trying to get a girlfriend. FYI, I am confirmed ugly, there is zero speculation as it's been repeatedly told to me over the years. The following are results from following the advice I got here to "just go for it". I also made sure I was well dressed had andwas very open to everybody. Every single woman rejected me. Every encounter falls into 4 failure scenarios. Girls #1-13: On the subway/public transport/open area and dressed my best. This is during the day time. I make eye contact with a woman only to have them immediately look away and never look back again. No acknowledgement, reciprocation, and a clearly visible look of disgust on their face. Decide to do a new approach and actually go by a woman instead, they look right at me and immediately shift their body away or move further up the platform. Girls #14-20: I see a woman I find attractive at an event and approach her saying I'd like to hang out with her sometime Very low pressure/fun, maintaining full eye contact. They all smile at first but then immediately walk away as I'm trying to talk to them again. Most just look immediately at their phones after and never look at me again for the rest of the night. Slight/veiled look of disgust on their face but the lowest of all 4 scenarios. Girls #20-30: Same as above only difference is doing it at night. Drunk women will talk to me for a few moments only to go off to other men. Look of disgust is not as obvious here but still very much there. It is instead replaced with a look of pity. Girls #40-50: This is a general rejection upon first sight. Even when approaching with a light anecdote or observation to start a conversation, they simply respond coldly and refuse to talk further. Any responses henceforth are equally dismissive or non-existent. EXTREME anger and resentment towards me for approaching them, almost fury. Look of disgust is strongest in these situations above all others. Had these just been isolated incidents, one could chalk to up to chance. But this is a consistent pattern that repeats 100% of the time. TL,DR Yes, it is possible to be TOO ugly to get women, that isn't a myth. I'm living proof. 2
Buddhist Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 And were any of the women you approached similarly considered ugly? 7
corsair427 Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 This is interesting, and I as well am in the same boat and get the same responses as you. I didnt want to believe it at first but it is true. Trying other ways to attract girls though
corsair427 Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 In public atleast, but online its easier, have you tried that? atleast initially 1
xXMarlboro_ManXx Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 These women were "ugly" too right? Cause then this might be thread worthy. 2
Timshel Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 curiousman- I will not insult your research or intelligence by being argumentative. I am a woman and it is true that conventionally unattractive people do suffer in the dating game. So there it is. However, while I have not kept tally, at least weekly I observe odd looking and/or unattractive people coupled with a smile on their face. The truth is, I may notice them more. My opinion is not based on empathy, I would be a liar and insincere. It's been a breeze so far. I am grateful, sheer luck and can't take credit. Have hope and remain true to yourself. The odds may be lower but there remain endless possibilities as in all things. Allowing yourself to become despondent will be of no assistance and work against you. Trite but true: Love yourself, keep your chin up, love what you do; Good always follows good but does not always show up when and how we expect.
SycamoreCircle Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 You may be ugly but I enjoyed reading your post thoroughly. One of the best thread titles I've seen in a while. Consider expanding your research to a book. I think people would buy it. There is a subtle humor happening which I applaud you for. The ability to laugh at life is more valuable than good looks. 3
Buddhist Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 (edited) curiousman- I will not insult your research or intelligence by being argumentative. It's not an insult to either to simply ask what his sample set was. There is also such a thing as self-fulfilling prophecy and many people go throughout their lives creating that exact situation. I don't doubt he has trouble in the dating realm, but you can turn difficulty to impossibility depending on what you're targeting. I'm not ugly, but I'm not ever going to date this guy, no matter how many of them I approach nor for how long. Simply because I am not the female version of that. Edited February 23, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator removed URL to photo not permitted 2
Author acuriousman99 Posted February 22, 2015 Author Posted February 22, 2015 And were any of the women you approached similarly considered ugly? Some were, yes. I went after whoever I found attractive and some may be considered ugly. These women were "ugly" too right? Cause then this might be thread worthy. See above.
SycamoreCircle Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 (edited) It's not an insult to either to simply ask what his sample set was. There is also such a thing as self-fulfilling prophecy and many people go throughout their lives creating that exact situation. I don't doubt he has trouble in the dating realm, but you can turn difficulty to impossibility depending on what you're targeting. I'm not ugly, but I'm not ever going to date this guy, no matter how many of them I approach nor for how long. Simply because I am not the female version of that. Um, that's not a guy. That's a boy.:-/ Edited February 23, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 1
Gaeta Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Some were, yes. I went after whoever I found attractive and some may be considered ugly. So your requirement to approach these women were that you had to find them attractive. How can you hold against women wanting to be approached by men they find attractive? 3
Author acuriousman99 Posted February 23, 2015 Author Posted February 23, 2015 So your requirement to approach these women were that you had to find them attractive. How can you hold against women wanting to be approached by men they find attractive? No, not all of them. I said I went after women who weren't attractive as well.
wb1988 Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 I don't think I've ever smiled at a woman who didn't give a big smile back. The sad part is that your intentions were probably very good (unlike mine), it sounds like you actually wanted to be a good bf. Here are my questions: The girls in your scenarios all sound attractive? Are you rich? If you're ugly and not rich then what makes you think that you deserve a hot girl? 4
Timshel Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Um, that's not a guy. That's a boy.:-/ With a feather tattoo.
Mangina Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Im the same as you. I met both my girl friends online, but they are not attractive by conventional standards.
SycamoreCircle Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 With a feather tattoo. Someone made a song about him: 1
Buddhist Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Um, that's not a guy. That's a boy.:-/ Guy\Boy, it matters not. What matters is I don't have similar facial asymmetry nor body aesthetics. To approach 50 of these then conclude that I am undatable would be a real error in logic. I am capable of dating, but as with all things, one has to be within the realm of possibility at the same time. The OP approached women he considered attractive. Fine, fair enough we all do that. I'm attracted to a range of people all the way from near physically perfect to somewhere in the region of where I personally sit. I know better than to approach physically perfect. Without pics, it's really hard to conclude that the OP is on the dating dungheap, or that his approaches were made within the realm of possibility. We can't ever really know.
wb1988 Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 You may be ugly but I enjoyed reading your post thoroughly. One of the best thread titles I've seen in a while. Consider expanding your research to a book. I think people would buy it. There is a subtle humor happening which I applaud you for. The ability to laugh at life is more valuable than good looks. Really, so us guys don't know that being ugly gets you no girls? Who would have ever guessed That's like saying that being lazy and dumb is not the key to making money. 3
elaine567 Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 The problem with this "research" is that any guy can be "ugly" to women and a turn off, if they give off the wrong signals, use the wrong body language, wear the wrong clothes, say the wrong things or have a bad attitude. We don't know how the OP comes across when he approaches these women, so assuming that most women were turned off purely by his "ugly" face may not be true. There may be a combination of factors here. 1
Timshel Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Guy\Boy, it matters not. What matters is I don't have similar facial asymmetry nor body aesthetics. To approach 50 of these then conclude that I am undatable would be a real error in logic. I am capable of dating, but as with all things, one has to be within the realm of possibility at the same time. The OP approached women he considered attractive. Fine, fair enough we all do that. I'm attracted to a range of people all the way from near physically perfect to somewhere in the region of where I personally sit. I know better than to approach physically perfect. Without pics, it's really hard to conclude that the OP is on the dating dungheap, or that his approaches were made within the realm of possibility. We can't ever really know. I sorry Buddhist. I get what you're saying and your point. Sycamore made a funny. It's funny.
Satu Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Delete 'ugly' from your vocabulary; it's a useless word. 5
Buddhist Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 I sorry Buddhist. I get what you're saying and your point. Sycamore made a funny. It's funny. Yeah I thought so too. Mainly because I wouldn't be attracted to that guy, but if I did post a pic of what I am attracted you would bother laugh all the harder. I had to quickly pick something I supposed most people would consider attractive.
todreaminblue Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Delete 'ugly' from your vocabulary; it's a useless word. I agree satu....ugly is what satan wants everyone to see......instead of looking for the beauty within us and bringing that out......and seeing the beauty in others...everyone is beautiful....and everyone has a different idea of what beauty is ..satan plays with our hearts.....plants the word ugly in there.... .i feel that op may have come across some actually quite rude people...but./...often when we are insecure about our presence...everything shifts in the world...people become non welcoming, looks appear different, words said take on a different connotation purely based on how we are feeling about ourselves on the inside..... ......deb 1
Gloria25 Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Attractive or not, I don't think we women are used to getting approached in public like in the TV commercials, movies, etc...unless, we are in a setting where we "expect" to get approached (i.e. a bar, night club). You know, I've dated guys that some family/friends were like "wow, he's dreamy", and I've dated some that some of them had the cojones to say "eeeh, no thanks"...The guys I date are "attractive" to me and that's what counts. That's why I hate OLD. The guys I've dated, regardless of looks, it was easier to be attracted to them cuz I had met them in real life and got a feel for them so even if some of them weren't "model types" - my attraction was cuz I got to connect with them in some way. On OLD, you flip through pictures and "resumes" (profiles)...if someone puts a not so cool pic and/or something's not good on the profile you flip to the next one. I see the same as some guy cold approaching me in public. I don't know you from Adam, so hard for me to be warm to you. And even "if" you were a hottie, I'd still wonder if you are some kind of pick-up-artist and/or f-ing with me. My recent crush, one thought that came to my head when we first exchanged words long time ago was "wtf does this dude want with me? is this some kind of frat joke?". So, even while I found him attractive, I still was weary about some dude speaking to me in public....even though he was just being a friendly person w/o any romantic interest. 3
elaine567 Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 ... some guy cold approaching me in public. I don't know you from Adam, so hard for me to be warm to you. And even "if" you were a hottie, I'd still wonder if you are some kind of pick-up-artist and/or f-ing with me. That would be my reaction too. Cold approaching women in public, I guess is not very productive, no matter who you are, or what you look like. 3
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