An0nymiss666 Posted February 21, 2015 Posted February 21, 2015 One thing that has helped me immensely is thinking of the things I don't miss about my ex. -He was a total narcissist -Snapped at me and even got to the point where he'd do it in front of family/friends -Lied to me throughout our entire relationship about big and small things even though he's "big on loyalty" -He was incredibly disrespectful at times -A complete hypocrite -He was always "right" -His way or no way -He could be a real slob and I got snapped at when I (kindly) confronted him about it -Diminished any sense of my importance in the relationship and even told me I was disposable -Didn't care about my opinions or anything I had to say -Nothing is good enough for him, even when it's "perfect" it's wrong, or there's still something better -He made me self-conscious about my appearance -He acted like he understood equality in a relationship but didn't treat me as an equal -I'm fairly certain he cheated -Acted like I was a burden, it was a burden to talk to me or give me attention but I was to devote all of my time to him -He barked orders at me (sometimes) -I especially don't miss his massive, ill-behaved, untrained dog It's only been about a month and a half. When I reminisce about the good times we had, I realize they were long before our relationship went sour. He's not that guy anymore. There's more things that I won't miss about him. Thinking of how he used to be nice or how we had good times, and how I miss doing things with him. It doesn't justify wanting to get back together because they're just memories, and those aren't enough in the end. What don't YOU miss? 3
Stercrazy Posted February 21, 2015 Posted February 21, 2015 She never seemed at peace. For her just sitting and relaxing was hard. Also I never really felt she told the whole story when we would discuss our issues.....not lie per say.....just not all the info. 1
Author An0nymiss666 Posted February 21, 2015 Author Posted February 21, 2015 She never seemed at peace. For her just sitting and relaxing was hard. Also I never really felt she told the whole story when we would discuss our issues.....not lie per say.....just not all the info. I can relate to this as well. While I know my ex did lie to me, I felt like I never got the entire picture when we talked about things (whether he lied or not). When we'd be sitting and relaxing it always seemed like something was on his mind, so he never seemed at peace either.
Stercrazy Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 I don't think she was totally honest of her feelings. Which caused some problems. She said she really tried with me though to be better at expressing herself. She was rarely in a bad mood and never really a "bitch"....lol. But I think it built up anger which turned into resentment. Hell.....I'm far from perfect....lol.
ghsteo Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 (edited) -Her frustration about the tiniest little things. "Printers out of ink, time for her to complain." -Her lack of independence, last thing I want to do when I get home from an 8-10 hour shift is go to the grocery store with her. Especially whenever she's been home all day. -Lack of sex, not that i'm getting any right now lol. But seriously 1 a week at best just doesn't cut it. No idea how I lasted so long, and **** I had to initiate it all the time. Towards the end she started wanted to trade massages for sex. Pathetic. -Her lack of finances, I had to pay for a lot of stuff. We bought a house and intended to split a lot of it down the middle. But eventually it came to me paying for it all, which made the breakup easier since I knew I could survive on my own. -Her lack of work ethic. I come from a family of hard workers, i've been working since I was 13 years old. She complained about working 30 hours a week 3 days a week. So annoying. -Her constant emotional detachment and mood swings. One week she would be showering me with love, next week she could barely stand to be around me. This inevitably pushed her towards cheating on me and me kicking her to the curb. -She would not go to the doctor at all, she's never been to the gyno and she's like 24 years old and sexually active. This I guess goes along with her lack of independence. Edited February 22, 2015 by ghsteo
mightycpa Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 uh, which one? Here's one each for the major players ( >1 year ) -- nasally voice -- gave me an STD -- bossy -- too demanding -- Lady Gaga drama without the talent -- liked me too much too soon -- liked me too much too soon -- nothing (mutual loss of interest on same morning! only true mutual breakup! had breakfast after that) -- spent too much money on drugs with her (fun, but bad for me) -- a little too dumb ahhhhhh...
smellysocksuni Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 - Her messiness - Always talking about herself, and never showing an interest in my life - Her increasing vain and arrogant behaviour, which increased the more weight she lost - Not willing to spend Christmas with me, despite that it's the hardest time for me with the loss of my mum - Turning arguments around on me and making me apologise all the time
darkbloom Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 uh, which one? Here's one each for the major players ( >1 year ) -- nasally voice -- gave me an STD -- bossy -- too demanding -- Lady Gaga drama without the talent -- liked me too much too soon -- liked me too much too soon -- nothing (mutual loss of interest on same morning! only true mutual breakup! had breakfast after that) -- spent too much money on drugs with her (fun, but bad for me) -- a little too dumb ahhhhhh... Do tell the STD story. And the lady gaga drama without talent. My interest is peaked.
Brentune Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 -Racist even though she was asian, and I was Hispanic (but often get confused as black). -Trend follower -Childish -Needy -Never told the whole story. -control freak -Bossy -Never talked about her issues and only ran from them -Poor planner -Poor hygiene (often went 2 days without showering) sometimes I could smell her lady parts through her clothes. -Turned into a pathological liar after break up/cheating to avoid being caught even though I already knew everything -Tried to make me seem like a stalker/psychopath for trying to find out if she cheated or not. -Can't make friends so she depends on relationships to keep her company -Craves attention -Has to put me down when I'm around friends because she has none. -always spoke badly of my friends. -Ignorant -Thinks she's "too good for everyone" -Needs to get her life together. She's 32. Makes only $13.50 an hour with no real career. Lives at her mom's house and pays no utilities but believes she's still "too good for everyone" because she's a sex addict and extremely attractive so guys hound for her.
mightycpa Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 (edited) ,Do tell the STD story. And the lady gaga drama without talent. My interest is peaked. First, forgive the Englishtroll in me. The word is piqued. Anyway, the STD. Do you like the original Star Trek? Season 1, Episode 7, The Naked Time. Turn your speakers up and watch this clip from youtube for like 3 seconds.... you'll hear a little sound effect they used. Go ahead, do it now, I'll wait for you. You'll enjoy the story better if you listen for like three seconds. Ok, did you hear it? Good. So, I'm going out with this girl in my sophomore year in college. She's nice, nothing too special, but she's got a nice body, ****s like a bunny rabbit, and she's cool to hang around with. It was the end of spring and we started to get fairly complacent with each other... things were just starting to roll downhill, and the end of the school year approaches. She invites me to her apartment one night for dinner. She's a horrible cook, but she's wearing an apron and nothing else. We eat a little bit, head straight to the bedroom and withing minutes, I penetrate. Remember that little sound in the video? I heard/felt/sensed something just like that at that very moment. It came from down below, like it entered me and announced itself. I swear on my life that's true. It was weird, but I thought nothing more of it, given my immediate priorities. So within a couple of days, I've got this itch thing going on INSIDE MY SHAFT. I go down to the clinic and the doctor pulls out the longest Q-Tip I've ever seen in my life. It had a wooden stick too, not that wrapped cotton. He explains that he has to take a swab, and I immediately experience major shrinkage. MAJOR shrinkage. Apparently this is nothing new to him and he calls in the nurse to give me a few tugs while he readies the cotton-tipped quiver. She's looking right at me and I barely began to respond, and then he's in. DEEP. Although I have to say, it did scratch that itch. They prepared a culture and not too long after, I'm back in for two penicillin shots in the hips with the biggest needles I've ever seen to treat the DRIP, DRIP, DRIP OF GONORRHEA. When I leave they ask me how many people I've been with lately. It's just her, and they said, "Well, it is unlikely you got this from each other, so take two of these pamphlets, one for her, and one for whoever it is she's come in contact with, and they both need to come to the clinic now. Oh, and you don't get this from toilets seats." Can you imagine? Plus, I was under orders, no sex for two or three weeks. I head straight over to her house, and I was angry, but it didn't bother me emotionally. I just felt "dirty", like used dishrag dirty. I gave her the pamphlet, showed her where I got the shots and she broke down, cried, confessed, told me she loved me, and I'm like, yeah well, that's great but I'm never seeing you again. I did see her again, she'd come hang out at my frat sometimes. Me and my frat brothers gave her the nickname "The Plague" and she ended up going to a different school the next year. Never saw her again after the end of sophomore year. Ah, college memories. </shudder> Maybe tomorrow I'll tell you about the girl with a flair for the dramatic. Edited February 22, 2015 by mightycpa 1
Author An0nymiss666 Posted February 22, 2015 Author Posted February 22, 2015 -Racist even though she was asian, and I was Hispanic (but often get confused as black). -Trend follower -Childish -Needy -Never told the whole story. -control freak -Bossy -Never talked about her issues and only ran from them -Poor planner -Poor hygiene (often went 2 days without showering) sometimes I could smell her lady parts through her clothes. -Turned into a pathological liar after break up/cheating to avoid being caught even though I already knew everything -Tried to make me seem like a stalker/psychopath for trying to find out if she cheated or not. -Can't make friends so she depends on relationships to keep her company -Craves attention -Has to put me down when I'm around friends because she has none. -always spoke badly of my friends. -Ignorant -Thinks she's "too good for everyone" -Needs to get her life together. She's 32. Makes only $13.50 an hour with no real career. Lives at her mom's house and pays no utilities but believes she's still "too good for everyone" because she's a sex addict and extremely attractive so guys hound for her. HA set her up with my ex. They can be racists that don't shower, and think they're too good for everyone together. Amongst everything else there.
bigtrouble Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 Though I am over her... There is nothing I don't miss about her... I fell in love, looked pass all her flaws... Saw her for who she really is... I guess this is just me...
ghsteo Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 I call bull****, please pull that pussy off the pedestal.
Brentune Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 HA set her up with my ex. They can be racists that don't shower, and think they're too good for everyone together. Amongst everything else there. Funny thing is my ex actually says it. She doesn't think it. She honestly believed she's too good for everyone. After the breakup she constantly tells me how she's just too good for everyone and she's never going to settle because no one is worth her time.
BlackOpsZombieGirl Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 -Racist even though she was asian, and I was Hispanic (but often get confused as black). -Trend follower -Childish -Needy -Never told the whole story. -control freak -Bossy -Never talked about her issues and only ran from them -Poor planner -Poor hygiene (often went 2 days without showering) sometimes I could smell her lady parts through her clothes. -Turned into a pathological liar after break up/cheating to avoid being caught even though I already knew everything -Tried to make me seem like a stalker/psychopath for trying to find out if she cheated or not. -Can't make friends so she depends on relationships to keep her company -Craves attention -Has to put me down when I'm around friends because she has none. -always spoke badly of my friends. -Ignorant -Thinks she's "too good for everyone" -Needs to get her life together. She's 32. Makes only $13.50 an hour with no real career. Lives at her mom's house and pays no utilities but believes she's still "too good for everyone" because she's a sex addict and extremely attractive so guys hound for her. My GOD. 1, 8, 10, 12, 15 & 16 would have DEFINITELY been deal breakers for me and aspects about their core personality that I would NOT have been able to tolerate for long! Please tell me that your relationship with this emotionally damaged girl didn't take up too many years of your life! .
BlackOpsZombieGirl Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 . Overall, he was/is a good person with a beautiful soul and a heart of gold...however, he was a good person who was emotionally damaged and (verbally and physically) abused by both of his parents. Had I known this before I fell in love with him, I probably would not have entered into a relationship with him. That being said, there are a few things that I "don't" miss about my ex: * The way he would always check online whenever I talked about something, anything, in an attempt to prove me wrong or to correct me. If he had done it once in a while, I probably might've been able to overlook it. But he did it, a lot. It made me feel stupid sometimes whenever he did prove me wrong, which made me realize that he didn't really care what I had to say or the content of what I was talking about; I was under the impression that, for him, it was all about correcting me for any inaccuracies of the information I was talking about. And on the times that he checked online and my information was correct, well, then he just went radio silent. * The way he would sometimes verbally disrespect me, condescend me and yell at me whenever he didn't agree with something I said, thought or did. His severely emotionally damaged father passed on this unfortunate "legacy" to his son and in turn, my ex acted it out on me. Very sad. * The way he would chew his food with his mouth open. Aagh! This really bothered me so much, but, y'know...no one's perfect; so I dealt with it. There were many times when I tried to tune out the sound of him chewing by raising the volume of the tv or by mentally humming a song but most of the time, those methods didn't work. It was just something I learned to accept about him and wasn't a deal breaker in the grand scheme of things. His beautiful soul, his sweetness and the way he'd always try to fix things for me or to improve a negative situation I was in and make it better trumped his chewing with his mouth open. * He was um, a bit sloppy. He'd leave his candy wrappers, soda cans, dirty dishes and his dirty laundry on the floor. Almost ALL of the time. Once, I was horrified when I awoke one weekend morning to find his toe nail clippings on the living room table next to the remote control! Not sure if he did this on purpose or not (as this incident occurred toward the end of our relationship), but omg. I normally would've discarded the disgusting find and told him about it after he woke up. But instead, I left it right where it was and covered it with a paper towel so I wouldn't have to look at it and when he woke up, I nicely asked him to please clean up the "mess" that he left on the living room table. Instead of reacting horrified and apologetic, he smirked and said, "Oh, sorry..." and then discarded the pile of toe nails and wiped the table clean. * The way he would sometimes ignore me when I was talking directly to him. This would happen mostly whenever he was driving or when we were on the couch channel surfing. I mean, there was no one else in the room so he KNEW that I was talking to HIM. A normal person would respond in SOME way, either by nodding their head in agreement or respond verbally to whatever the other person was saying to them. But, sometimes, he wouldn't respond AT ALL. He wouldn't acknowledge that I was even in the room, let alone that I was talking to him and expecting some sort of response to him to show me that he was listening. And whenever I'd let him know that, out of common courtesy, I would like for him to respond in some way to me talking to him, he would get bothered by it and say things like, "Well, there was nothing I needed to add to that" or "What did you expect me to say? What?" It just felt really disrespectful to me whenever he did it. Thank God he didn't do it too often. Other than the things I've listed above, there's nothing else that I "don't" miss about my ex. Everything else about his core personality and his character traits were things that I loved about him and that I adored. Even after listing these few things, it reminds me of the other things that I "do" miss about him... .
Brentune Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 My GOD. 1, 8, 10, 12, 15 & 16 would have DEFINITELY been deal breakers for me and aspects about their core personality that I would NOT have been able to tolerate for long! Please tell me that your relationship with this emotionally damaged girl didn't take up too many years of your life! . Just one. We been broken up for only a month. Love is weird, you tend to ignore everything. I guess it really is a drug.
na49 Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 I miss my ex even though she has negative qualities. I will list some of the negative things about her anyway though. - Talks too much - Annoying voice - Extremely overconfident - Never takes criticism well - Attention whore - Had to post every single thing about her life on social media. Nothing in our relationship was private. - Bossy (even her parents called her out on the way she talked to me) - Rarely ever asked me about how my day was, but would spend hours (literally hours) talking about one thing that happened to her. - Loved to talk about her past with her "emotionally abusive ex" but it was really just a relationship she had when she was like 16.. - Told me she was curious about my past, but never showed interest. - Says she loves animals, but is afraid of them. - Exaggerated things ALL THE TIME - When I was right in an argument, she'd threaten to kill herself so that we would stop fighting. (and she wouldn't have to admit she was wrong) - Very immature - Glued to her phone - Could never take a hint - Unrealistic view on what relationships are - Rarely ever admitted she was wrong - Never really took responsibility for leaving me the first time, and discounted my feelings during the breakup even though I was the one who got dumped. - Never wears deodorant. Just sprayed some perfume under her arms - Rarely shaved - Smelly lady parts - Did a bad job cleaning herself after going to the bathroom - Could never do anything for herself. Her mom would do everything for her when I was at her house. She couldn't even heat food up herself. - Afraid of fire, so did not want to learn to cook if we didn't get an electric stove. - Can't drive - Crazy double standards in our relationship where I can't look at pictures of attractive actresses, or say a woman is pretty, but she can have flirty relationships with all the guys she wants, and drool over famous men. This list felt good to write. That being said, this is the girl that I love..
leia1028 Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 Whenever I start missing my ex, I snap myself into thinking about why it didn't work out and yes, what i DONT miss. Thank you for this thread. My ex was: -controlling. He wanted things done his way. -he always thought he was right about everything, so he didn't know how to apologize since he was never wrong. -manipulative -blamed me for majority of situations that went wrong (therefore we constantly fought) -EXTREMELY jealous (I was with this guy for almost two years...he put me on lockdown to not make any guy friends and cut communication from my current guy friends) -gets upset so easily -he made me feel terrible about myself -wanted me to contact him "24/7" -barely considered my point of view or my opinions -sometimes unappreciative -he was immature -he was possessive (it was nice at first that he wanted me all to himself...but it got out of hand that he literally just wanted me ALL to himself) Looking back at what i don't miss, it makes me happier that I'm out of that relationship. Red flags everywhere. Over the time we were together, I got use to his behavior and accepted it as normal which became terrible for me. Yeah there are some things I miss about him, but I think about the relationship in the long run. Would I really want to marry that guy? If I was still in the relationship, I would still be suffering with his behavior which is unacceptable. Now that I'm free, I can talk to people and do things that I love, and find someone who will love me and treat me like i deserve to be treated. And for anyone else out there reading my comment, you will find that person too! Keep your head up, stay positive, remind yourself that there are good people out there, love yourself before you love anyone else, and move forward with your life. 1
Darrk23 Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 -Paid more attention to Kpop idols than me -Always made me feel like the bad guy -Wanted a relationship but was too busy to invest in one -Cold
sammiexo Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 here are things that made me unhappy during our 10 year relationship... -Never said I love you..maybe said it 2 times.. -Let people walk all over him -Never stuck up for me or was on my side -Thought he knew everything -Family problems up the wahzoo -insecure (he always thought I would cheat on him..HA!) -Depressed -Unsympathetic -Homophobic -Emotionally stinted -Cheating, unfaithful mothereffer
darkbloom Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 , First, forgive the Englishtroll in me. The word is piqued. Anyway, the STD. Do you like the original Star Trek? Season 1, Episode 7, The Naked Time. Turn your speakers up and watch this clip from youtube for like 3 seconds.... you'll hear a little sound effect they used. Go ahead, do it now, I'll wait for you. You'll enjoy the story better if you listen for like three seconds. Ok, did you hear it? Good. So, I'm going out with this girl in my sophomore year in college. She's nice, nothing too special, but she's got a nice body, ****s like a bunny rabbit, and she's cool to hang around with. It was the end of spring and we started to get fairly complacent with each other... things were just starting to roll downhill, and the end of the school year approaches. She invites me to her apartment one night for dinner. She's a horrible cook, but she's wearing an apron and nothing else. We eat a little bit, head straight to the bedroom and withing minutes, I penetrate. Remember that little sound in the video? I heard/felt/sensed something just like that at that very moment. It came from down below, like it entered me and announced itself. I swear on my life that's true. It was weird, but I thought nothing more of it, given my immediate priorities. So within a couple of days, I've got this itch thing going on INSIDE MY SHAFT. I go down to the clinic and the doctor pulls out the longest Q-Tip I've ever seen in my life. It had a wooden stick too, not that wrapped cotton. He explains that he has to take a swab, and I immediately experience major shrinkage. MAJOR shrinkage. Apparently this is nothing new to him and he calls in the nurse to give me a few tugs while he readies the cotton-tipped quiver. She's looking right at me and I barely began to respond, and then he's in. DEEP. Although I have to say, it did scratch that itch. They prepared a culture and not too long after, I'm back in for two penicillin shots in the hips with the biggest needles I've ever seen to treat the DRIP, DRIP, DRIP OF GONORRHEA. When I leave they ask me how many people I've been with lately. It's just her, and they said, "Well, it is unlikely you got this from each other, so take two of these pamphlets, one for her, and one for whoever it is she's come in contact with, and they both need to come to the clinic now. Oh, and you don't get this from toilets seats." Can you imagine? Plus, I was under orders, no sex for two or three weeks. I head straight over to her house, and I was angry, but it didn't bother me emotionally. I just felt "dirty", like used dishrag dirty. I gave her the pamphlet, showed her where I got the shots and she broke down, cried, confessed, told me she loved me, and I'm like, yeah well, that's great but I'm never seeing you again. I did see her again, she'd come hang out at my frat sometimes. Me and my frat brothers gave her the nickname "The Plague" and she ended up going to a different school the next year. Never saw her again after the end of sophomore year. Ah, college memories. </shudder> Maybe tomorrow I'll tell you about the girl with a flair for the dramatic. No worries on the englishtroll thing. There are no excuses for using the incorrect form. It won't happen again. I literally snorted out loud at work reading that. Can you please start your own thread of ex stories? Most entertaining thing I have read all day.
Situasian Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 Well here goes my list *Constant liar *Cheated on me 3 times but didn't confess until i called her out on it on each occasion *Would constantly hit me physically even in front of our friends and her own family *Would make me feel like the worst person in the world if i didn't do everything she said *I work to work 64 hours in 4 days(16 hours travel time included) and she would complain about me being tired and not wanting to do anything when i got home *I paid for virtually everything but she still would find something to complain about *Constantly be checking my phone etc but I wasn't allowed to check hers *Would try to use sex as a bribe if i didn't buy her something List could go on but i'm getting mad/headache from writing all this lol
ManyDissapoint Posted February 23, 2015 Posted February 23, 2015 1. Horrible communicator (I wasn't superstar either) 2. Forever resentful of past things. 3. Busted my chops about pictures of ex-girlfriends that I had in a forgotten box from many years ago. I never once looked at them since I moved continents 6 years ago. 4. Hyper judgmental of my family. We have problems but they're my family. 5. Withheld important information to the relationship, or trickle truthed it in, in order to make herself look better. 6. Vain. 7. Had a bone to pick with nearly everybody. 8. Inflexible to cultural differences in the new country we lived in. 9. Did not support me in my desires in the relationship, just wanted to move on to the stage in life that would benefit her. 10. Selfish on big relationship things, tried to make up for it by doing small things like making food etc. 11. Made this very fake face every time she looked in a mirror or passed a reflective window. 12. Her butthole was never clean which put a bit of a damper on sexy times. 13. Never expressed her desires for little things, but would resent me for not knowing them. Expected me to be a mind-reader. 14. Had ridiculous notions about relationships. Fell in love very quickly, claimed she could wait for me 10 years (at the end she lasted 1 month). Too much Disney. 15. She would be sarcastic and ironic during serious conversations, delicate subjects and arguments, preventing positive discussion. 16. MANIPULATIVE.
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