Black Cement Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 So last night this girl messaged me but then deleted it after a couple of hours. It said something like "I have this childish, naive, low-key, crush on you. Please don't tell anyone, and keep it a secret." I just responded, "Lol, you're secret is safe with me. ;)" But I don't get it, why does it have to be a secret? We're both single. Is it bad to have a crush on me? Why did she delete the DM right after? IDK, over the years this happened to me. Its so obvious they have crushes on me, and let me know, but they don't want anyone else to know about it... Any insight?
Buddhist Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 Could be many things but based on what you've written I think this is her low-key naive and emotionally safe way to let you know she's interested. People share secrets when they want intimacy, not because she's ashamed to like you. But phrasing it like that, it seems as if she could laugh it off as an in-joke, if you don't feel that way about her. She was probably hoping the reply to look like this.... I've had a crush on you too, but it's just between you and me. Wanna go out for drinks? She deleted it because she felt foolish for putting it out there and not getting the response she desired. 1
Author Black Cement Posted February 20, 2015 Author Posted February 20, 2015 Could be many things but based on what you've written I think this is her low-key naive and emotionally safe way to let you know she's interested. People share secrets when they want intimacy, not because she's ashamed to like you. But phrasing it like that, it seems as if she could laugh it off as an in-joke, if you don't feel that way about her. She was probably hoping the reply to look like this.... I've had a crush on you too, but it's just between you and me. Wanna go out for drinks? She deleted it because she felt foolish for putting it out there and not getting the response she desired. The thing is, i don't know anything about her & she's okay looking. My ex told me the same thing, but I was attracted to her. So I told her I felt the same way, and we got together eventually. I did feel kinda like a jerk with my response, hope she's not hurt.
Buddhist Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 I don't think your response was particularly jerk-like. A real jerk would have copied it, pasted on their facebook wall and let all his friends laugh at it. If you keep her confidence then you are being the opposite of a jerk. You are being a guy who isn't into her, but is gracious about her overture anyway. 1
todreaminblue Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 i dont think you were a jerk at all.....having others laughing about it would be jerk like..calling her a stalker or a creep or that she creeps you out.....and letting others knowing how she felt for you and laughing it up....definitely jerk like.that would be highly hurtful...any of the above....it would make it difficult for her to face others even the thought of it..........you kept her confidence and thats respectful and a good thing....best wishes.........deb
mightycpa Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 Why don't you just ask her why it should be a secret? Sounds like she could be your secret girlfriend. Why not? It's not like she wants to marry you or anything.
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