Annie767 Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 Hi all Just wanted to vent a little as I found out a development in my exes life today. I was with my partner for 4 years, I'd been in love with him for 8. We were ready to start a family, settle down and marry. I loved this man with all my being. We travelled together. We had a great relationship before his commitment issues?psychological break down ? Set in .....he tore us apart in the most hellish way imaginable. He returned to an ex from his past (a pathological liar in his words) and started a relationship with her making sure I was a spectator. My life was turned upside down. I had to move out and I was left with absolutely nothing. When I went no contact my life improved despite the hellish first 6 months. I got back on my feet after much wallowing and in one way I have had one of the best years of my life. Doing what I want and caring for myself. A while back I met a great guy who has two kids of his own and I've learnt a lot. We are still in early stages but a lot of that is me letting walls down very slowly. I've also battled a health issue and feeling proud of myself for getting through the last year. I suppose the message would get to me eventually but today I got told that he had a terrible relationship with her, they split up multiple times and now he regrets everything. He's cried to his friends said I'm a good person and he doesn't know why he acted the way he did. He knows he pushed me out for good. I thought I would savour this day but I don't. I feel sad. Because I feel like, he threw it all away......and it was for nothing. Part of me wants to make contact and ask him why. Part of me wants an apology but I know that isn't going to change anything. Hope there are people out there who can relate. Thanks for reading.
jus d'orange Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 Hey Annie, While I can't quite relate to this, I can say that it would probably be best if you didn't contact him. You've moved on and are working on developing a new relationship. It's okay that you feel sad over what happened in the past, because it does sound like he was mindless and threw it all away for what in the end was something very stupid. Unfortunately, as much as we wish people could always make good decisions, especially when others are involved, they often don't and there's nothing we can really do about that. Furthermore, it'll still feel bad, even if the decision to leave and end a relationship is ultimately pretty meaningless. Keep going with your success in moving on and hold your head up high. Let him regret the decisions that he made, while you've accepted that it happened and are busy with moving forward positively with your life. 1
Author Annie767 Posted February 20, 2015 Author Posted February 20, 2015 Thank you kindly. Things are a little bit different now I've slept on it. Like you say I had no control of his actions and there is no way I can correct them. Onwards and upward. I'll reclose that chapter.
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