Otter2569 Posted February 16, 2015 Posted February 16, 2015 I have an awesome GF (9 months and going strong) It is a serious, committed, honest relationship....the best I have ever had. The problem is that every time her friends and older daughter come over its nothing but a gossip fest. It seems that everyone in this town is sleeping around or they are a drunks or on drugs.... Its the cheating that drives me nuts! Most of her girlfriends have cheated, are cheating or have left their husbands for someone they cheated with. My GF was cheated on by her ex husband so she in turn cheated on him (she admitted this when we first me and said it absolutely ruined her life, was humiliating and was the biggest mistake she ever made). Bottom line: the negativity and cheating that appears to be going on in this town disgusts me. I hate hearing about. A few times I have expressed my disgust for what goes on around here...I dont even like being around these people when these subjects come up. I dont live in my home town to know all the crap that happens but then again I really dont care to know or associate with people that act this way. Its all so disheartening and completely negative!
Gloria25 Posted February 16, 2015 Posted February 16, 2015 (edited) Not everyone is cheating... I've got guys turn down cheating with me But, the funny thing is I've had some guys turn down cheating with me only to cheat with someone else lol... Sometimes I think they didn't take me up on the offer cuz they held me in higher esteem; and/or they felt I wanted more with them. Oh well. Edited February 16, 2015 by Gloria25
Clay Posted February 16, 2015 Posted February 16, 2015 I would suggest she finds better friends. Not much you can do about the rest unless you don't trust her. Clay 1
compulsivedancer Posted February 16, 2015 Posted February 16, 2015 Not everyone is cheating... I've got guys turn down cheating with me But, the funny thing is I've had some guys turn down cheating with me only to cheat with someone else lol... Sometimes I think they didn't take me up on the offer cuz they held me in higher esteem; and/or they felt I wanted more with them. Oh well. Do you have a thing for married guys? I know you've dated at least one in the past, but this makes it sound like that's your "type." 2
Gloria25 Posted February 16, 2015 Posted February 16, 2015 Do you have a thing for married guys? I know you've dated at least one in the past, but this makes it sound like that's your "type." No I don't geeesh.... I knew I was gonna get flamed/flash back from me posting in this tread. Time to take out the MIB pen thingy and flash you all so you forget I was ever an OW.
No Limit Posted February 17, 2015 Posted February 17, 2015 I wasn't even involved in a romantic relationship yet but there's been a married guy and a guy in a 3-year-relationship who would have loved me as their OW. Eww no. Slammed the door in their faces. 2
Author Otter2569 Posted February 17, 2015 Author Posted February 17, 2015 Gloria, I have walked away from a several cheating opportunities. I'm not saying that some did not get hot and heavy but when it came right down to it I did not sleep with them. I also avoided others that were a much more obvious hit and run. In most cases I was married or was seeing someone important to me. That was not always the case and it was not always easy. A few times I have thought about going for but I usually had my boys or plans or something so I never put myself in that position. Believe me, I am not passing judgement but to me it seems fundamentally wrong to screw another mans GF or wife behind his back.
No Limit Posted February 17, 2015 Posted February 17, 2015 Believe me, I am not passing judgement but to me it seems fundamentally wrong to screw another mans GF or wife behind his back. This is something I find rather funny about this MGTOW internet movement. Most men there won't mind screwing "someone elses" GF/wife at all, preaching pregnant ones to be fair game since they're now safe from getting trapped, in fact they seem to take pleasure from it, kind of like punishing the stupid BF/husband for getting into a relationship with a woman in the first place.
Author Otter2569 Posted February 17, 2015 Author Posted February 17, 2015 Clay, you are right about the friends. Most of these are former friends from before we started dating that we run into when we are out and about so then I get their story. She has since distanced herself from a few others after realizing that they are NOT real friends - just people looking for validation because they are miserable, cheating, divorcing etc and she has divorced, cheated, is single and dating. It seems that once we got together and were happy they dropped off. She was more of a drinking buddy and shoulder to cry on versus being true friends.
Author Otter2569 Posted February 17, 2015 Author Posted February 17, 2015 No Limit, any dog can run with the pack. I saw this when I was getting divorced. It was surprising to see married guys that I knew suddenly texting and lurking around my ex to be. At the end of the day you either have integrity or you do not. I like to think that there is such a thing as karma. 1
compulsivedancer Posted February 18, 2015 Posted February 18, 2015 No I don't geeesh.... I knew I was gonna get flamed/flash back from me posting in this tread. Time to take out the MIB pen thingy and flash you all so you forget I was ever an OW. I wasn't trying to flame you. Just the way you made that sound...like in addition to being an OW, you propositioned more than one other married guy. No judging, just curious.
Robert Z Posted February 18, 2015 Posted February 18, 2015 No I don't geeesh.... I knew I was gonna get flamed/flash back from me posting in this tread. Time to take out the MIB pen thingy and flash you all so you forget I was ever an OW. Besides, we're both lesbians now. 1
dichotomy Posted February 18, 2015 Posted February 18, 2015 (edited) Cheating is unfortunately a notable occurrence. Statistics vary - but I have seen references to the amount of cheating in marriages - is somewhere from 30-50% for men and women. I used to think this was sad and depressing, and horrible, but I am closer to just seeing it as human/animal nature. I do think it is important to consider who your partners friends are and what their beliefs are. It is one thing to gossip about cheating - but more important to see how they view it and what they themselves do. You might want your gal to get some new friends - if they are cheaters. We had to purge one or two of my wife's GF's. Edited February 18, 2015 by dichotomy
Author Otter2569 Posted February 18, 2015 Author Posted February 18, 2015 I take no enjoyment in other peoples problems...unless of course they have wronged me in some way! It just blows me away because I have never heard such gossip other than women criticizing parenting habits or kids behavior etc. Pretty tame stuff. So hearing all this crap really sets me off. Not to mention how people stay together while all this garbage is going on.
Author Otter2569 Posted February 18, 2015 Author Posted February 18, 2015 Revolver, I have heard that before and dont think it doesnt stick in the back of my mind.
TrustedthenBusted Posted February 19, 2015 Posted February 19, 2015 Once a cheater always a cheater I agree with this. Only I think it is possible for a cheater to get caught, realize how F'd up it is, and never do it again. But that person will forever be labeled a cheater, and nothing will change that.
Recommended Posts