Should I Go Exclusively Go After Ethnic/Black Women?

[jimmybuckets1]

I was having this discussion with some guys on another site and they said no attractive white girl ever wants to date an ethnic man. The reason I ask this question is because I live in a heavily white area so narrowing myself to only brown women/women of color heavily stacks the odds of dating against me

 

 

 

picture of me - http://s23.postimg.org/9ntj075l7/Snapshot_20150215_26.jpg

Edited February 15, 2015 by jimmybuckets1

[StalwartMind]

Those "other" guys are incorrect, simple as that.

[Gaeta]

Will you stop with no white women will date you ...sigh. Are you that insecure about your cultural background! Plenty of white beautiful women date men outside their race. Date who ever you want as long as it is sincere.

[jimmybuckets1]

. Are you that insecure about your cultural background!

 

 

when did I say that? I tell people I'm 100% Armenian all the time, they find it very interesting that I was born there. This question is not really brought forth by me, a lot of people seem to tell me that I should only go after middle eastern women

 

 

do I even look that middle eastern? I feel like I can easily pass for Spanish or Greek or something.

[Revan32]

Those "other" guys are incorrect, simple as that.

 

It isn't as simple as that. A lot of white girls won't seriously date an ethnic guy. You can stick your head in the ground as much as you want but it doesn't make it any less true. As OP will say, he's been trying to find one for a while now, but so far none of them will.

 

What part of the country are you from OP?

[jimmybuckets1]

It isn't as simple as that. A lot of white girls won't seriously date an ethnic guy. You can stick your head in the ground as much as you want but it doesn't make it any less true. As OP will say, he's been trying to find one for a while now, but so far none of them will.

 

What part of the country are you from OP?

 

 

I live in the midwest bro near Chicago

 

 

I'm about as white washed as it gets. I listen to country music and play football in my free time. White people here love me as one of their own

[OrangeParty]

The reason I ask this question is because I live in a heavily white area so narrowing myself to only brown women/women of color heavily stacks the odds of dating against me

You can't control whether others are attracted to you.

 

So why do you want to intentionally limit your dating pool? Why should you "exclusively" go after ethnic X/Y/Z? What happens when a white woman is attracted to you?

 

Keep an open mind. Yes, you may find it harder to attract white people, but that's no different from some women not finding themselves attracted to not so tall men, men with baby faces, men who don't have athletic builds, single dads, etc. Ethnicity is just another piece of the attraction puzzle; it is no more or less significant than other attraction values.

[jimmybuckets1]

You can't control whether others are attracted to you.

 

So why do you want to intentionally limit your dating pool? Why should you "exclusively" go after ethnic X/Y/Z? What happens when a white woman is attracted to you?

 

Keep an open mind. Yes, you may find it harder to attract white people, but that's no different from some women not finding themselves attracted to not so tall men, men with baby faces, men who don't have athletic builds, single dads, etc. Ethnicity is just another piece of the attraction puzzle; it is no more or less significant than other attraction values.

 

 

I guess what baffles me is that I seem to check every box that people talk about in dating

 

 

Athletic - check

No baggage - check

Extremely successful - check

Great lifestyle - check

Intelligent - check

Caring/decent character - check

 

 

yet I can't even seem to get a date to get this process started. I don't understand what it is that I'm missing

[codelock]

Honestly, I hate when people make this about superficial things. I'm X race, therefore white people won't like me. I'm X height and all the women want taller guys. I hate to say it, but this is up to the individual.

 

I've seen many white people, women and men, go for other ethnicities. I'm actually non-white multi-racial and have only been out with white guys until recently where other ethnic groups have taken an interest in me.

 

Just be true to yourself and have fun. Communicate with any woman you find attractive regardless of her race or other traits and just see what happens. That's the best advice I can give you.

[codelock]

I guess what baffles me is that I seem to check every box that people talk about in dating

 

 

Athletic - check

No baggage - check

Extremely successful - check

Great lifestyle - check

Intelligent - check

Caring/decent character - check

 

 

yet I can't even seem to get a date to get this process started. I don't understand what it is that I'm missing

 

Are you primarily online dating? If so, it's normal... stop making it personal. I meet most of the guys I date OFFLINE and am considered pretty attractive and great by many peoples standards. Finding a guy online has been a challenge. I've met 3 guys in the past 12 months online, 2 of which seemed really odd. However, in the past 1 month, I've met 3 guys who I've been on dates with all of whom are really cool and normal.

 

Online dating is a messed up system. It works for some people but the payoff takes a lot of time. I think you'd be better off focusing your energies on meeting great people in person than hours viewing profiles on a website.

[jimmybuckets1]

Are you primarily online dating? If so, it's normal... stop making it personal. I meet most of the guys I date OFFLINE and am considered pretty attractive and great by many peoples standards. Finding a guy online has been a challenge. I've met 3 guys in the past 12 months online, 2 of which seemed really odd. However, in the past 1 month, I've met 3 guys who I've been on dates with all of whom are really cool and normal.

 

Online dating is a messed up system. It works for some people but the payoff takes a lot of time. I think you'd be better off focusing your energies on meeting great people in person than hours viewing profiles on a website.

 

 

I don't do online dating but you're a woman, how do you have anything negative to say about online dating? I'm sure you get 50,000,000 messages a day. There's inevitably a few good looking and nice/decent guys in that group. What's the problem?

[codelock]

I don't do online dating but you're a woman, how do you have anything negative to say about online dating? I'm sure you get 50,000,000 messages a day. There's inevitably a few good looking and nice/decent guys in that group. What's the problem?

 

This statement tells me a lot about your character and that is likely what is turning people off to you.

 

Also, please keep the thread to yourself. If I have any issues with dating, then I'll make my own thread.

[jimmybuckets1]

This statement tells me a lot about your character and that is likely what is turning people off to you.

 

 

It says a lot about me being in touch with reality?

 

 

My sister once said she tried online dating and her inbox was overfilled with messages of interested suitors in like 3 days

[OrangeParty]

I guess what baffles me is that I seem to check every box that people talk about in dating

 

 

Athletic - check

No baggage - check

Extremely successful - check

Great lifestyle - check

Intelligent - check

Caring/decent character - check

 

 

yet I can't even seem to get a date to get this process started. I don't understand what it is that I'm missing

Again, the one thing you're missing is attraction.

 

I'm East Asian, so I know exactly how you feel. I can't change how I look like, so it doesn't help me at all going all "I'm Asian, therefore no one likes me." It's absolving myself of effort and responsibility.

 

Do white women prefer white men? Do average women prefer tall men? Do X women prefer men with deep, baritone voice?

 

Even if you know the answer to all of the above, so what? What exactly can you do to change that? Zero. Nothing. So why worry about whether your Armenian background is holding you back? Not a damn thing you can do about it.

 

I'm overweight. That *is* something I can change. Not my Asian looks. Maybe I'm coming across as unapproachable. That is also something I can change. Not my Asian looks. So why would I dwell on the fact that I'll look Asian for the rest of my life?

 

Maybe it'll take me longer to find a date. But it's not merely because I am Asian. It's a combination of everything that makes me attractive -- or not -- to another woman. Change what you can, and accept what you can't. (There's a saying in there somewhere, I'm pretty sure).

[jimmybuckets1]

Again, the one thing you're missing is attraction.

 

I'm East Asian, so I know exactly how you feel. I can't change how I look like, so it doesn't help me at all going all "I'm Asian, therefore no one likes me." It's absolving myself of effort and responsibility.

 

Do white women prefer white men? Do average women prefer tall men? Do X women prefer men with deep, baritone voice?

 

Even if you know the answer to all of the above, so what? What exactly can you do to change that? Zero. Nothing. So why worry about whether your Armenian background is holding you back? Not a damn thing you can do about it.

 

I'm overweight. That *is* something I can change. Not my Asian looks. Maybe I'm coming across as unapproachable. That is also something I can change. Not my Asian looks. So why would I dwell on the fact that I'll look Asian for the rest of my life?

 

Maybe it'll take me longer to find a date. But it's not merely because I am Asian. It's a combination of everything that makes me attractive -- or not -- to another woman. Change what you can, and accept what you can't. (There's a saying in there somewhere, I'm pretty sure).

 

 

So you have other things outside of race that hold you back and the bolded is a big thing

 

 

put yourself in my shoes - get yourself in awesome shape, start dressing great, having a great lifestyle and maximizing every single thing that you have control over...and see how frustrated you get if you still can't get a date

 

 

I mean it's not like I'm particularly dark in complexion. I just have the olive complexion you see on Italians and Spaniards

[Satu]

The other guys are talking nonsense.

 

You're a nice looking guy.

 

Don't limit yourself.

[Easyguy14]

I guess what baffles me is that I seem to check every box that people talk about in dating

 

 

Athletic - check

No baggage - check

Extremely successful - check

Great lifestyle - check

Intelligent - check

Caring/decent character - check

 

 

yet I can't even seem to get a date to get this process started. I don't understand what it is that I'm missing

 

 

Missing good looks perhaps?

[jimmybuckets1]

Missing good looks perhaps?

 

 

I get compliments all the time on my face and body, many times from random strangers

 

 

It never comes across properly in pics, I look terrible in pics most of the time

[OrangeParty]

 

put yourself in my shoes - get yourself in awesome shape, start dressing great, having a great lifestyle and maximizing every single thing that you have control over...and see how frustrated you get if you still can't get a date

 

I'm not downplaying your frustration. I get that. But there's still not a damn thing you can do about our skin color. Women are either attracted to us, or they are not. If you are already perfect, then keep being perfect. Do the best you can. Lots of us wish we were blessed with your good looks. Someone out there wants you. You just have to keep your chin up, and leave as many options open as possible.

[jimmybuckets1]

I'm not downplaying your frustration. I get that. But there's still not a damn thing you can do about our skin color. Women are either attracted to us, or they are not. If you are already perfect, then keep being perfect. Do the best you can. Lots of us wish we were blessed with your good looks. Someone out there wants you. You just have to keep your chin up, and leave as many options open as possible.

 

 

I know there's going to be someone attracted to me but is she going to be decent looking herself? This isn't even starting the questions of whether we can have a relationship. I just find dating to be nearly impossible in difficulty

 

 

BTW thank you for the compliment

[Popsicle]

Don't listen to those guys. Date whomever you want.

[jimmybuckets1]

Don't listen to those guys. Date whomever you want.

 

 

it's not necesarily about whoever I want, it's about them wanting me... assuming they're decent looking and nice

[alphamale]

god, if i wanted to date black women i'd have a new date every night for years. unfortunately i'm not attracted to them

[Popsicle]

it's not necesarily about whoever I want, it's about them wanting me... assuming they're decent looking and nice

 

So the two black/brown women in your area want you?

 

Every guy wants a good-looking, nice woman. Seems to be hard to find even in the largest, most diverse cities.

[jimmybuckets1]

So the two black/brown women in your area want you?

 

Every guy wants a good-looking, nice woman. Seems to be hard to find even in the largest, most diverse cities.

 

 

 

no you said that I should date whoever I want, I said that it doesn't necessarily matter who I want. The girls have to want me