contact1 Posted February 15, 2015 Posted February 15, 2015 Focusing on trying to get a job, even a part time one would be best. Work can really take your mind off of things, especially if it is something you enjoy. Once you are in a better place and your health improves, that would be when you would want to give the notion of finding someone some thought. And rather than worry about why a women wouldn't want you, focus on why a women would want to be with you. What makes you worth dating and being a partner with. And than figure out what type of woman would be worth it to you to be with, just to date. Stop worrying about marriage and them cheating and so forth, that is soooooo far ahead of things, it shouldn't even be considered until you are considering proposing to someone, that's when you really think "is this the one who I know can be faithful", not before you even meet the person. Don't let not having a girlfriend stress you, believe me it isn't all peaches and cream, it has plenty of ups and downs. The best you can do is improve your situation. When you do that, people will notice and gravitate towards you, it's just natural.
Author NJ123 Posted February 15, 2015 Author Posted February 15, 2015 Focusing on trying to get a job, even a part time one would be best. Work can really take your mind off of things, especially if it is something you enjoy. Once you are in a better place and your health improves, that would be when you would want to give the notion of finding someone some thought. And rather than worry about why a women wouldn't want you, focus on why a women would want to be with you. What makes you worth dating and being a partner with. And than figure out what type of woman would be worth it to you to be with, just to date. Stop worrying about marriage and them cheating and so forth, that is soooooo far ahead of things, it shouldn't even be considered until you are considering proposing to someone, that's when you really think "is this the one who I know can be faithful", not before you even meet the person. Don't let not having a girlfriend stress you, believe me it isn't all peaches and cream, it has plenty of ups and downs. The best you can do is improve your situation. When you do that, people will notice and gravitate towards you, it's just natural. Thanks, this is pretty good advice. And true, but a girlfriend could still cheat on you as well, not just someone in a marriage. So it's something that really could happen well before getting married. I see it on this forum, it happens constantly. And sometimes on other forums I go on I see it quite a lot where the man gets cheated on when he least expected. And of course it's not just men that get cheated on, men cheat a lot as well. But it seems today men & women cheat just as much as each other compared to in the past where it was seen as men were the cheaters in vast majority of cases.
RedRobin Posted February 16, 2015 Posted February 16, 2015 You need to have hobbies, interests, and good friends/family. Having goal(s) in life that are bigger than you also helps. Because the thing is... even if you do meet someone, if you don't have any of the above, you will likely then obsess about how to keep that person, and that isn't attractive either. Lots of people are incredibly lonely even while in a relationship or married. Finding someone isn't a panacea to fix all of your problems or worries. 3
Author NJ123 Posted February 17, 2015 Author Posted February 17, 2015 You need to have hobbies, interests, and good friends/family. Having goal(s) in life that are bigger than you also helps. Because the thing is... even if you do meet someone, if you don't have any of the above, you will likely then obsess about how to keep that person, and that isn't attractive either. Lots of people are incredibly lonely even while in a relationship or married. Finding someone isn't a panacea to fix all of your problems or worries. This is true. But the ones who are lonely in relationships or married, those ones tend to not last or they cheat or consider cheating since it's obvious something is missing from their partner. My only hobby at the moment is working out really. There's not much else to do in terms of hobbies in my area, at least I can't think of any. You have any suggestions?
RedRobin Posted February 17, 2015 Posted February 17, 2015 This is true. But the ones who are lonely in relationships or married, those ones tend to not last or they cheat or consider cheating since it's obvious something is missing from their partner. My only hobby at the moment is working out really. There's not much else to do in terms of hobbies in my area, at least I can't think of any. You have any suggestions? Sure! Learn how to dance, learn how to play an instrument, take up woodworking, sculpting, photography... teach a kid how to read...Big Brothers/Big Sisters... Find a local environmental group and pick up trash in the local park... Train for a marathon... train for a triathlon... Volunteer at a senior center... Volunteer at an animal shelter... Learn how to do a carbon footprint for your community... Buy an old house and fix it up... Learn how to ride a motorcycle... Learn how to scuba dive... Learn how to sail... Join a hiking group... Go camping.... Learn how to cook... Start a garden... grow your own veggies... How's that for a start
Mangina Posted February 17, 2015 Posted February 17, 2015 I think your first priority should be finding a job. Then see what time you have left to do other things. Also unemployed is a big deal to girls. If you don't like the jobs available to you, you should learn some vocational trait. My friend makes a lot of money as plumber, more than I make with my college degree. Another guy I know has a broiler room license and he drives a hemi challenger
Author NJ123 Posted February 17, 2015 Author Posted February 17, 2015 I think your first priority should be finding a job. Then see what time you have left to do other things. Also unemployed is a big deal to girls. If you don't like the jobs available to you, you should learn some vocational trait. My friend makes a lot of money as plumber, more than I make with my college degree. Another guy I know has a broiler room license and he drives a hemi challenger True. I've been told of possibly doing a trade, but I really have almost no interest in any of that. Might just have to get any job for now, while I try to decide what I want to do with school to take up something for an actual career.
ktya Posted February 17, 2015 Posted February 17, 2015 It seems it's always on my mind to want a girlfriend but it just makes me feel worse if it's constantly on my mind. I could go days without letting it affect me than it could hit me out of nowhere & obsess about it again. It's like an imaginary on & off switch for me. 1. Download Tinder and get a good picture 2. Swipe Right on every single person who appears on your screen 3. When you get a match message the girl 4. When you get another match message the girl 5. When the girls message you back get their phone number in under 15 minutes 6. Text the girl set up a date 7. Confirm the date a few hours in advance so you dont get stood up and feel like a retard 8. Go on the date and just be yourself 9. After you part company go back to step 2
Author NJ123 Posted February 17, 2015 Author Posted February 17, 2015 1. Download Tinder and get a good picture 2. Swipe Right on every single person who appears on your screen 3. When you get a match message the girl 4. When you get another match message the girl 5. When the girls message you back get their phone number in under 15 minutes 6. Text the girl set up a date 7. Confirm the date a few hours in advance so you dont get stood up and feel like a retard 8. Go on the date and just be yourself 9. After you part company go back to step 2 I already have Tinder. But I don't take it seriously. I just go on there out of curiosity to see who I match with. And I do the swipe right to every girl. And as shallow as it sounds, but I need to be honest, 90-95% of the ones I match with I hardly find attractive. Not sure why that is.
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