I must be from a different planet

[M_Theory]

I literally dont understand the dating scene nowadays. Not one bit. I feel as if I'm an alien from a different planet when it comes to interacting with women nowadays. I was married, and got divorced a few years ago. Now that I'm single again it seems that being cordial, having manners, and treating people with respect has all been thrown out with the trash. When did this happen? Has it been a gradual change or was it drastic? It seems that every woman I date or communicate with has not one care about how she interacts with me, or how I may perceive her.

 

I've gone on a date with a woman I'm currently talking to. But communicating with her has been like pulling teeth. She has spurts where she will engage long text sessions, but then disappears for days at a time. And she usually disappears when I ask a personal relationship based question, or a get to know you type question that new dates ask each other. And instead of answering my question, she will text me a day or two later with a cheerful "Good Morning :laugh:".... or some other happy comment.

 

She is not the only one though. This seems to be the norm with all the women I have dated or tried to date recently. I dont know if they have a sporadic attention span or just think its totally fine to ignore a question and change the subject.

 

I get the feeling like women nowadays really "dont care" what a guy thinks anymore. Its as if they know they can garner attention and dates from multiple sources via social media, so they dont have to put much energy into interacting with me. And if I'm the type that expects normal give and take respectful communication, then she will kick me to the curb and start over with one of the 20 other guys knocking at her door.

 

I understand people can get busy, and have other things going on in thier lives. I understand you may want to think things through before answering me. But I think its just flat out rude to ignore a question altogether, only to reply a day or two later with a fresh greeting or subject change.

[Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646]

You've been married forever, so yeah its gonna be a shock.

 

 

Just need to up your game and roll with the punches.

[central]

I think you're just meeting the wrong kinds of women, because many are not like that at all. Perhaps you need to find a different way or place to meet them, that provides more compatible opportunities. I've always had the best matches using online dating, and more particularly match.com.

[BeatsByDirk]

Dating is the same as just living life. You have to be worth something for people to want to talk to you, interact with you, see you on a regular basis. What can you give them that they want, need, like that they have a hard time getting out of somebody else.

If someone I'm talking to avoids questions regularly I stop talking to them. If somebody has too many rules about the way we interact(when/how/where) I'm also out.

I think the trick is to not be in a rush to meet anyone, look to make friends and anything extra is a bonus.

Also start engaging in a social activity where you can meet people you enjoy, if you don't have one spend all of your life looking for one because everyone should have one or two at least!

Organic, thoughtful, reciprocal relationships are what I would look for and romance can develop from there.

[Woggle]

I am so glad not to be single right now because I would probably just become a monk or something.

[Gaeta]

Why do you waste your time trying to date these women? When they don't act 'normal' then just drop them immediately. You should be able to tell if someone is 'normal' even before meeting just by the way they handle themselves online.

 

I am a woman. I went on a 1st date tonight, I was chatty, bubbly and flirty. There are women that still know how to handle themselves and be interesting. You need to filter the trash to find them.

 

Oh and by the way, it's not only applying to women. I will spare you my 10s and 10s of stories about men who don't know how to handle themselves and even acted like pervs during out 1st meeting.

[Woggle]

Why do you waste your time trying to date these women? When they don't act 'normal' then just drop them immediately. You should be able to tell if someone is 'normal' even before meeting just by the way they handle themselves online.

 

I am a woman. I went on a 1st date tonight, I was chatty, bubbly and flirty. There are women that still know how to handle themselves and be interesting. You need to filter the trash to find them.

 

Oh and by the way, it's not only applying to women. I will spare you my 10s and 10s of stories about men who don't know how to handle themselves and even acted like pervs during out 1st meeting.

 

This is true. It's people in general these days. I don't know happened but people are just awful anymore.

[Noproblem]

I literally dont understand the dating scene nowadays. Not one bit. I feel as if I'm an alien from a different planet when it comes to interacting with women nowadays. I was married, and got divorced a few years ago. Now that I'm single again it seems that being cordial, having manners, and treating people with respect has all been thrown out with the trash. When did this happen? Has it been a gradual change or was it drastic? It seems that every woman I date or communicate with has not one care about how she interacts with me, or how I may perceive her.

 

I've gone on a date with a woman I'm currently talking to. But communicating with her has been like pulling teeth. She has spurts where she will engage long text sessions, but then disappears for days at a time. And she usually disappears when I ask a personal relationship based question, or a get to know you type question that new dates ask each other. And instead of answering my question, she will text me a day or two later with a cheerful "Good Morning :laugh:".... or some other happy comment.

 

She is not the only one though. This seems to be the norm with all the women I have dated or tried to date recently. I dont know if they have a sporadic attention span or just think its totally fine to ignore a question and change the subject.

 

I get the feeling like women nowadays really "dont care" what a guy thinks anymore. Its as if they know they can garner attention and dates from multiple sources via social media, so they dont have to put much energy into interacting with me. And if I'm the type that expects normal give and take respectful communication, then she will kick me to the curb and start over with one of the 20 other guys knocking at her door.

 

I understand people can get busy, and have other things going on in thier lives. I understand you may want to think things through before answering me. But I think its just flat out rude to ignore a question altogether, only to reply a day or two later with a fresh greeting or subject change.

 

 

 

Tell them exactly how you feel and maybe then they will respect you!

[GemmaUK]

I wouldn't be up for answering personal questions via text either.

 

 

For me, those kind of questions are for face to face conversations, not for text chatter or even emails.

 

 

Texts for me are just to check in now and then or to firm up meeting times and places.

 

 

I also am not big on texts back and forth all day, I find that I run out of things to say, feel obligated to reply and also don't get any chance to miss the guy.