na49 Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 So I've been trying to get over the same girl for the second time. She left me again a little over a week ago, and I'm back on the roller coaster of emotions. I checked her Facebook, saw her picture with a new guy, and got angry. She told me that "it is over. What else is there to speak of?" when I asked if I could call her last week, and when I told her I would do anything to fix things, she said that she "is not looking back". and yet, I still hope for her to come back again. I wonder if she is thinking about me/what she is doing, or if she regrets leaving me for the second time. There are times that I feel angry, but when I feel sad, I can't fight it and I waste hours just thinking. So, how have you been fighting the sadness? When you find that they are all you can think about, how do you get out of it?
PaperCrane Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 I think about "Why do I need to let my happiness reside within the hands of others?"
Mi7522 Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 You only get out of it by letting go and moving forward. The more you stalk her on social media the longer it will take for you to be able to move on. When you start feeling sad go for a run or do something to keep your mind busy. Losing someone you love is tough but I seem to feel better when things like She told me that "it is over. What else is there to speak of?" when I asked if I could call her last week, and when I told her I would do anything to fix things, she said that she "is not looking back". are said to me. Keep reading this over and over until it finally sinks in. 1
The Poster Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 I think about "Why do I need to let my happiness reside within the hands of others?" I agree with this to an extent, but if people have the mentality of not needing another person to be happy then no one would ever suffer a broken heart. Love is a wild thing. It gives people magical feelings of euphoria, and it also can give people endless bouts of agony and suffering. Just the way it is. 1
Nascarfan Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 The best way in my opinion is the simplest way. First, you cut off the source that's fueling these thoughts. This is accomplished by complete NC. Then, you understand that these are things that we can't change. Letting go doesn't mean not caring, it means letting it be. It means to surrender. Lastly, always express the feelings you have. You can do this in many ways (making music, talking with others, writing letters, doing what you love). Never hold them in. Negative and curious thoughts will enter your mind every now and then but don't give them any more power than they have. Deal with them, but don't feed them. This process is not easy, and requires patience, but it is temporary. You will make it through, and you will be a much stronger person because of it. Always remember that, every step forward you make in this process is a step closer to meeting the girl of your dreams.
xpaperxcutx Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 The only person causing yourself pain is yourself. Stalking her on social media is the worst way to really start healing. Go complete NC. Even if you feel angry and sad, you have to embrace those feelings. 1
Author na49 Posted February 14, 2015 Author Posted February 14, 2015 I don't plan on looking at her Facebook anymore. I had a weak moment earlier this week and ended up checking. It looks like she was celebrating the fact that she dumped me again, and seems excited to live life without me. This paired with her profile picture being with the guy who told her he had a crush on her should give me all of the tools I need to move the f*ck on. it isn't always that easy though. I've had a better time fighting the sadness today, but there are so many things happening that I would have loved to tell her. I can't though, and that makes me feel like crap. The thought of her actually being gone forever still hurts.
Mi7522 Posted February 14, 2015 Posted February 14, 2015 I don't plan on looking at her Facebook anymore. I had a weak moment earlier this week and ended up checking. It looks like she was celebrating the fact that she dumped me again, and seems excited to live life without me. This paired with her profile picture being with the guy who told her he had a crush on her should give me all of the tools I need to move the f*ck on. it isn't always that easy though. I've had a better time fighting the sadness today, but there are so many things happening that I would have loved to tell her. I can't though, and that makes me feel like crap. The thought of her actually being gone forever still hurts. You're not thinking of you. That's all that matters, make yourself happy, as long as you let her dictate how you feel you'll be in a losing battle. It's all about you right now
ForgingAhead Posted February 14, 2015 Posted February 14, 2015 As others have mentioned, block her from social media, seriously.. I just did that, but would look at her pics and think "Oh yeah I remember when she.." she unfriended me cause I took my power back aka, told her i'm moving which she didnt like (long story, she was seeing someone else which happened way to fast after she dumped me), so she unfriended me.. I decided to block her, and focus on me and my kids. Its a daily struggle easily, but out of sight out of mind.. Save your strength and energy, and respect yourself. If you decide to do a movie marathon, then do it.. Movies like 300, Terminator, The Good The Bad and the Ugly, whatever... just take care of you and get healthy!
Author na49 Posted February 14, 2015 Author Posted February 14, 2015 I have her blocked on my account. I had made another account, and used that to look at her Facebook. but I have not looked at it since, and am afraid to look at it again. Seeing how much she was celebrating the fact that she left me (posting motivational pictures, and quotes about how "people aren't mature enough to handle you" or "my best friends hear what i don't say") made me want to throw up. It still does just writing about it. Also you got that right. It is a daily struggle. I'm trying hard to not wallow in self pity, and miss her. I shouldn't miss her at all. Just trying hard to worry about myself, and what I need to do. My responsibilities aren't gone just because she is. I still have a lot of work to do.
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