losangelena Posted February 14, 2015 Posted February 14, 2015 OP, I know sometimes it's hard to let go, and that dwelling on the fantasy of what "could have been" is so appealing. But again, I have a feeling that this man's bad qualities would have come out eventually, despite any effort on your part to the contrary. For your own sake, try and not dwell on this for a while. Give yourself a day or two or three to just let it slide, see how you feel, and proceed from there.
spiderowl Posted February 14, 2015 Posted February 14, 2015 Once a guy backs off, you've got to let him. If he's interested in you, he will be back. The very fact that you are not running after him will make him stop and think. He's got the freedom to mull it over and to miss you. If he doesn't come back, there is no point chasing him. He's not interested. You have nothing to gain by chasing a guy. When a guy is interested, he will be back of his own accord.
ExpatInItaly Posted February 14, 2015 Posted February 14, 2015 You need to stop. This obsession that you have is really disturbing. You will never know what you had because he never wanted it in the first place. Stop fantasizing about this. Focus on your reality. OP, you need to listen to this. This man was never interested in a serious way. But for some reason, you don't want to accept that. It's done now. For your own sanity, close this chapter.
Larry56 Posted February 14, 2015 Posted February 14, 2015 Oh please, some of the women here telling the OP that he wasn't serious about her. Please take some responsibility for yourselves! for pete sake. Is it EVER your fault? or is always the man. I'm laughing my ass off here at the arrogance of the women who are saying he's a jerk when you know for a fact this girl ****ed up. You got needy, showed yourself as unreliable and jealous. At least the OP is admitting it to herself. All you 'women' are just trying to support her by LYING to her about why she's messed up.
Zahara Posted February 14, 2015 Posted February 14, 2015 (edited) Oh please, some of the women here telling the OP that he wasn't serious about her. Please take some responsibility for yourselves! for pete sake. Is it EVER your fault? or is always the man. I'm laughing my ass off here at the arrogance of the women who are saying he's a jerk when you know for a fact this girl ****ed up. You got needy, showed yourself as unreliable and jealous. At least the OP is admitting it to herself. All you 'women' are just trying to support her by LYING to her about why she's messed up. I believe everyone has pointed out the fact that her behavior was wrong and uncalled for and even to the point of being "crazy" which OP has clearly grasped. On the other hand, it doesn't take away from the fact that he was never interested in her in the first place. Secondly, it doesn't take away from the fact that he is jerk that she shouldn't be pursuing. Maybe the sign of a man with decency and one who is "interested" in a healthy way is one that is forceful in getting sex on their first date, maybe the sign of a decent man and one who is "interested" in a healthy way is one who guilts a woman into coming over and pleasing him, at least in your world. A man can treat you with respect and dignity even when he isn't interested in you. She wanted to know if she screwed up, yes she did and even though she did, she screwed up over someone that wasn't a decent guy. Edited February 14, 2015 by Zahara 3
stillafool Posted February 14, 2015 Posted February 14, 2015 I think LS has done all it can for her at this point. Maybe professional counseling would be able to reach her because it's not happening here. 2
losangelena Posted February 14, 2015 Posted February 14, 2015 At least the OP is admitting it to herself. All you 'women' are just trying to support her by LYING to her about why she's messed up. lol, thanks for calling our very gender into question. I agree with Zahara. OP has already been told multiple times, "you went crazy, you messed up," and she's asked that we not keep harping on that. Her original question was how to fix her mistake, and that's what we keep telling her—that there is no way to fix it. I never said it was all the guy's fault, I'm just saying that it didn't sound like he was such an amazing catch in the first place. That's a lot different than absolving someone of their mistakes.
deathandtaxes Posted February 15, 2015 Posted February 15, 2015 again thank you for your feedback. I do believe this guy is worth the fight. So, does anybody have any ideas on how to fix this? How in the wild **** are there eight pages for this ****? FIX it? LMFAO! The guy should thank his lucky stars that he's not with you, OP, cuz from your first post you have come across as bat-**** crazy. No offense - but that's just how your own post comes across. There is no fixing this. End of discussion.
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