lizzygirl Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 He started with love bombing. Then manipulation of the ex, talking about her all the time, riding by her parent's house, saving her pic to his phone. And I still put up with it because after all, his wife shot herself so he had been through a lot. Just my typing that sounds awful, but you had to be there. He reeled me in. I felt sorry for him. Now I think a wife would not kill herself if she had a great husband. At the time, I did not think that. And it is still hard. Dealing with a narc.... Then he moved away because he had to, for his job. Asked me to marry him but wouldn't when he said "this weekend" and I even said I don't need a ring, let's just get married but his excuse was no, you deserve more than that, yet refused to marry me EVER...gave me a big ring but it seemed it was only for show to others who had wronged him ( the ex included) hence his fb post "here is your shock and awe" not, I am marrying my best friend, she said yes, etc....he refused to move back here for a job because it was "beneath him" even though it would mean we did not have to be away from one another for 2 weeks at a time and see each other every other weekend. We could have made it just fine, but not to his standards. Oh, I got pregnant (he always wanted a child of his own! Not!) and he made me have an abortion and take the pills because he could not "be here to take care of me." But then the weekend it happened, he was not here even though he was in town because he does not want to spend time with my kids ever! Oh but he brought me some McDonald's on Sunday, and that was it. Obsessed about his ex, but there was nothing to it and I was overreacting.And apparently when he sold his house up here it was ok to stay with me then when he had nowhere else to stay. Oh, and he paid me back exactly 6 months later, because he did not have a job because he was fired even though his dad had just bought him a new rifle for $1200 and he had not even paid for his late wife's headstone because she was "dead as hell." Turns out, after 3 years of all of the above (and I am leaving a LOT out to save time) he lay sleeping in my bed as I open his laptop and all I see is his membership to eHarmony. Oh, after the awkward meeting with the girl he works with who acted weird around him at the company dinner and her alcohol got the best of her and she made a beeline to him and started scratching his back in little intimate circles. But I am suppose to believe that was nothing. Then in his effort to win me back, he "admits" there really was something going on with the original ex, but nothing physical, but yet I was right about texts and fb messages he always made me feel like a piece of **** for. But hey, he bought me stuff, fixed my shower, cut my grass, and paid for a new kitchen faucet so that must mean he loves me, right? And he wants to take me out this weekend for Valentine's. I think he is a piece of crap. Pleaseeeee someone out there tell me I am right!!
towardthefuture Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 Sounds like there's a lot of baggage and resentment. Even if you do ultimately work it out you should definitely go NC and have a cooling off period.
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