kit4kat Posted April 4, 2005 Posted April 4, 2005 I am so worried about one of my good friends. He's wasting his life away and wasting a lot of energy and emotions on this one girl-- I like to call her the devil. She's completely wrong for him, and screws with his mind and feelings on a daily basis. They had broken up a while back. He was devistated. For nearly a week I would be up till 3 or 4 in the morning just talking to him. Then, he started hanging out with her again. No one in his family likes this girl... even his best friend hates her. I found out today that she did it again, she broke his heart. I have never hated anyone in my life before, and right now I hate her so much. I've had a feeling that he's been in a depression since the original breakup, but now I fear that he's going to slip further into it. When I saw him this afternoon I could tell how upset he was. He said he was going to sit and sulk in his misery tonight. This just kills me! I know right now he needs to be around supportive guy friends. I just wish he had some to turn to... all of them have given up on him because of her. I asked him if he wanted to hang out tonight, and he said he'd rather sit at home and be alone. Which is fine, I think. But I know I can't let him do that for too long. I'll keep trying to get him to hang out and get him out of his house some time this week. But I think it's gonna be more difficult this time around... Has anyone been through this before? Any suggestions? I'm just really worried about him
RecordProducer Posted April 4, 2005 Posted April 4, 2005 KIT4KAT, I think you're secretly in love with this guy and can't bear the thought that he is in love with this bad girl!
tokyo Posted April 4, 2005 Posted April 4, 2005 Originally posted by RecordProducer KIT4KAT, I think you're secretly in love with this guy and can't bear the thought that he is in love with this bad girl! Sorry, she just sounds like a concerned friend.
paradox Posted April 4, 2005 Posted April 4, 2005 I can't understand why the girl is so evil? There are always two sides to every story..
Author kit4kat Posted April 4, 2005 Author Posted April 4, 2005 Haha no, I am not secretly in love with him. Though, that would've made for a great love triangle, and kept the readers of this post entertained... Anyway, let me update ya'll a bit. I talked to him late last night. He ended up hanging out with some of his guy friends (I was so glad about that!). He is sad, but he knows he'll get over her. He knows he should've never gone back to her in the first place too. So hopefully, all will be well in a matter of weeks! Paradox, you bring up a good point as well. There are always two sides to a story. In this case, I don't really care about hers. I know enough about her to know that she's a horribly mean person. And thats enough for me.
alphamale Posted April 4, 2005 Posted April 4, 2005 just leave him alone, there is nothing u can do. he needs to figure this one out himself.
FolderWife Posted April 4, 2005 Posted April 4, 2005 Are you REALLY upset because she's playing him...or are you upset that he's just so freaking into her that he puts up with her sh*t, when you are sitting there perfectly available and waiting, and he doesn't want you? Do you hate her for being a biotch, or do you hate her because she has what you want? You don't know what you've got til it's gone...stop being there for this clueless crush, and maybe he'll wake up and see you.
RecordProducer Posted April 4, 2005 Posted April 4, 2005 Kit4Kat, if you don't have problems of your own, create them! Go fight for children's rights, collect money from the rich guys to give it to the ill kids, help women who are abused, help animals...whatever...You think you're a saint for helping a friend in his love relationship? Big deal, he'll live. I can't understand this worrying about the neighbor's cat who got a flu, but not caring at all for people who die of hunger, wars, and violence. If you want to be useful to this world, do something, but if you're going to worry about your friend, spare us. If he posted here, we would have helped him. We don't help happy people. They (including you) don't need help. We have problems of our own and are here to support each other, not to worry about those who don't need our help.
tokyo Posted April 4, 2005 Posted April 4, 2005 Maybe I'm missing out on something, but I'm not really seeing that many signs of infatuation in her posts. She seems to be a bit overly concerned, but that's what friends are for. To give you a kick and wake you up when you don't see clear anymore. And RecordProducer, please, telling her to fight against the hunger in the world, because she's worried about her friend is such a nonsense and totally out of place. And maybe you have never heard of balance? Some people don't see the big picture and some people just see the big picture and don't see the important details anymore. There are a lot of great men who fight for peace and justice while their kids become spoiled and rotten, because their daddies were out and too busy fighting for the big issues. There's a line between being a friend and being a superfluous overprotective nuisance, but I wouldn't say that kit4kat has passed that already.
Author kit4kat Posted April 4, 2005 Author Posted April 4, 2005 Are you REALLY upset because she's playing him...or are you upset that he's just so freaking into her that he puts up with her sh*t, when you are sitting there perfectly available and waiting, and he doesn't want you? Do you hate her for being a biotch, or do you hate her because she has what you want? You don't know what you've got til it's gone...stop being there for this clueless crush, and maybe he'll wake up and see you. Where are ya'll getting the impression that I have a crush on this guy? My goodness! I am really upset that she's playing him... no one deserves that. I'm just being a concerned friend, has no one ever done that for you before? I simply came to all of you to ask if you had been in his shoes before and what I could do to help. Kit4Kat, if you don't have problems of your own, create them! Go fight for children's rights, collect money from the rich guys to give it to the ill kids, help women who are abused, help animals...whatever...You think you're a saint for helping a friend in his love relationship? Big deal, he'll live. I can't understand this worrying about the neighbor's cat who got a flu, but not caring at all for people who die of hunger, wars, and violence. If you want to be useful to this world, do something, but if you're going to worry about your friend, spare us. If he posted here, we would have helped him. We don't help happy people. They (including you) don't need help. We have problems of our own and are here to support each other, not to worry about those who don't need our help. Why the attack RecordProducer? Seriously now, is it that big of a deal that I want to be there for a friend in need? What is your problem? This post doesn't even make sense... Kooky, thankyou! I don't understand what these two are getting at. You're right, I have NO infatuation with this guy at all. I'm just a bit concerned about him. And I agree with you 100%... this is what friends are for. These types of situations do show you who your real friends are.
Mr Spock Posted April 5, 2005 Posted April 5, 2005 If he posted here, we would have helped him. We don't help happy people. They (including you) don't need help. We have problems of our own and are here to support each other, not to worry about those who don't need our help. YOU have taken a retarded pill I see. "We" as if you're in some kind of exclusive internet club. I don't remember signing up for that when I joined this board. As IF your problems are more important to someone else then their own. To the original poster-listen and support your friend. Say nothing about her. If he hooks up with her again, tell him you simply won't be available to speak until 3 am like you used to, because you're tired of his self destructive behaviour bringing you DOWN. And it is, if it's making you angry. Only so much you can give as a friend before you need to engage in a little self protection. Oh, you can BE there but if he has issues that involve his girlfriend to work out that late, let him call her. Kit4Kat, if you don't have problems of your own, create them! Go fight for children's rights, collect money from the rich guys to give it to the ill kids, help women who are abused, help animals...whatever...You think you're a saint for helping a friend in his love relationship? Big deal, he'll live. I can't understand this worrying about the neighbor's cat who got a flu, but not caring at all for people who die of hunger, wars, and violence. If you want to be useful to this world, do something, but if you're going to worry about your friend, spare us. Do you somehow feel that a person needs to wear that kind of burden on their shoulders for everyone to see, all of the time, to have their words taken seriously? I am imagining you were feeling a little cranky when you wrote the above. It happens.
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