esteny1988 Posted February 12, 2015 Posted February 12, 2015 Hi, I’ll make this short. Last year, I (26 years old) lived with a few roommates and developed a huge crush on one of them (he’s 28) and I felt like there was definitely sexual tension and we flirted a lot. We ended up hooking up towards the end of my lease, but i was unsure if I would be staying in the same city so we left it as just roommates/friends with benefits. We hooked up maybe 6 times before I moved out and the sex was always really good but then had a bit of a falling out as hooking up with your roommate (with no exclusivity) will tend to do. I will add that he didn’t seek out anyone else to hook up with, but I felt like he wasn’t taking me seriously. I was very naive then. Anyway, I ended up getting accepted into a graduate program in the same city so I did stay in the area. He texted me in January (about 6 months after I moved out of the house and we had ceased communicating), to say that he hoped I was doing well and enjoying grad school. I always had a thing for him so I texted him back and we ended up meeting up for a drink. One thing led to another and we’ve now been hooking up again (twice since he texted me). He texted me a few times after the first hook-up just to ask how my week was etc, but he didn’t ask me out on a date. I figured he was just looking for sex so I didn’t try to make plans with him. I was a bit confused as to why he was texting me at all, was he expecting me to ask him out? However, I went to a party this past weekend and drank too much and texted him asking if I could come over. He got right back to me and said yes, so we hooked up again and this time I told him “I know this is just a hook up, but I won’t keep doing this.” He said “What do you want?” I said “a relationship” and he said “we can do that.” The next morning he took me out to breakfast and would say things like “I’ll take you there, let’s do that” when we talked about restaurants or museums in the city. He paid for my taxi home and kissed me goodbye, saying “see you later.” It is now Wednesday and I haven’t heard from him. I’m not sure if he’s expecting me to text him, but I would like to see him again. I don’t know if I’m being a fool though. Is he just using me until something better comes along? I always thought that if a guy is really into you, he will pursue you and you won’t be wondering if he’s interested. But I’m not sure now. I brought this up when I last saw him and he said “but I texted you first.” I don’t know what to think, am I being an idiot to text him now for a date?
WhatYouWantToHear Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 Ugh, why do people turn to the internet for random people's speculation about other's thoughts/intentions? Like somehow people outside the situation with no idea of what's happening can read a person's mind. You know what? There's a way to clear this all up--discuss this with him. And one other tip--don't do this when you are drunk/horny and moments away from the deed. You can't expect an honest discussion if the guy thinks saying the wrong thing will prevent him from getting some.
preraph Posted February 13, 2015 Posted February 13, 2015 Go ahead and text him. Try to have something to say that he's interested in. If you haven't told him you had fun on the date, be sure to do that. Always thank them for a date if they took you out, the next day. So do that.
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