Vuvu Posted February 10, 2015 Posted February 10, 2015 Ok. So I know my ex has BPD traits. I know her behaviour was towards me was really difficult. I've never been treated so badly. I know the relationship was unhealthy and unsustainable. I know that her previous partners received a similar fate to me. I know she will continue to act this way with the new guy given time. I know that the failure of the relationship was not my fault although I accept my shortcomings. I know that I have felt love towards her and her children. I miss them dearly. I know she has little realisation of the pain she has caused. I know that she has only thought of her own feelings and has rarely thought of my feelings. I know I will love again. I know she will contact me again in the coming weeks or months even though I initiated no contact several months ago. Yet I cannot seem to move on and forget the past - good and bad. The strong bond I had with the family I have lost. I've realised a lot about the reasons for certain arguments and events that left me so confused. I keep thinking about her and imagining her and the children happy with their new life without me. I sometimes think that she is laughing at me - calling me silly for being upset. I keep feeling that sometimes I am moving forward and yet now I feel like I've got back a few steps. I am heartbroken over this very seductive person. I have started seeing someone new. They know nothing about the last 6 months of stress and anxiety. I know my ex will now know that I am seeing this person. She will either disrespect me behind my back or otherwise not like that I am seeing this person because of previous situations. The last 6 months have been the worst ever time for me. I feel stuck.
Author Vuvu Posted February 10, 2015 Author Posted February 10, 2015 I know it will never work with this person and they would only cause me more pain further down the line - so why can't I dust myself off and lead a happy life again
Recommended Posts