e4u Posted February 8, 2015 Posted February 8, 2015 So...I just moved all the way across the country. I have no friends or family here and decided to try online dating for the first time two weeks ago as I've been really busy settling into work but still would really like to meet people. I have a few questions about online dating and I'd love to hear it from both the male and female perspective. 1. The people that I'm most attracted to in terms of both intelligence and looks, almost never respond to me. I get way more messages from people who are the opposite of me (attractive but intellectually not there...interests are different...if you know what I mean). For example, I'm a medical practitioners and "intellectual" but some goth, albeit good-looking, just started chatting with me. WTFudge am I doing wrong? My profile is pretty clear as to who I am...I don't lie about my likes/dislikes...are they just looking for someone different and those like me don't like someone with similar interests??? 2. For the love of god...I'm pretty good at "closing" in real life, getting a girl's number and setting up a date. I have now bungled 4 dates with the online messaging system. How do you close the date in the online world? It seems like the girls just want to talk for a long time on messenger for several days before being asked out. Am I right? It seems that the sooner I move to close, the faster they run away. I'm just not one to beat around the bush...that's all. It seems in the physical world that kind of confidence is attractive to women but in the online sphere it's like a disease of some sort. Any help/tips/examples would be MUCH appreciated on how to convert more messages into real dates. 3. What's the average response rate for guys on the dating world? About 90% of my messages are read by the girls, but I can't say that I'm doing better than a 10% response rate to those messages. I feel like I've become a leper. It's way easier to get an attractive woman out on a date with me in the "real world", but online I seem to be an outcast almost. Advice? Thank you!
NoC Posted February 8, 2015 Posted February 8, 2015 What are you doing wrong? Well being on a dating site is what you're doing wrong. I can never understand the appeal of online dating. How about you go out there in the real world and put yourself out there, live your life doing the things you love. If you have enough time for online dating, then you have enough time for going out making new friends. And what kind of logic are you using trying to find a date before you even make new friends? Make friends first!
Mangina Posted February 8, 2015 Posted February 8, 2015 You have a bit of a tall order. You're a medical practitioner and very intellectual and you're looking for a good looking women who has brains and intellect. Well,........... This is too much to explain, you're looking for something hard to find even in the real world, but I'll explain online dating. I hope this isn't too long. Online dating is extremely superficial it is mostly girls looking for someone who is more attractive and has more going for himself than they do. They're on there because they're not attracted to the guys who fancy them offline. A lot of them have no intention of meeting anybody and just like text guys they know like them because they don't have anything better to do. Why would the girl you're looking for be on a dating site? Unless she just moved like you or just really doesn't get out not the bar/club type, she's taken. You're looking for a needle in a haystack. If you have any doubts about anything I wrote, do this. Take a pic of a really good looking guy maybe someone you know who really gets a lot of girls and make another profile with his pics put a bunch of typos and silly stuff and write to the same firls.
spanishchick00 Posted February 8, 2015 Posted February 8, 2015 Online dating is what you're doing wrong. It's a waste of time. And even if you do go out on a date, most likely that person will update their profile picture/profile after the date and keep looking for that next hot person because they are never satisfied, and know how easy it is with just a click of a button. I gave up on OLD 2 months ago. I don't think I'm going back. 1
starmar Posted February 8, 2015 Posted February 8, 2015 Online dating is what you're doing wrong. It's a waste of time. And even if you do go out on a date, most likely that person will update their profile picture/profile after the date and keep looking for that next hot person because they are never satisfied, and know how easy it is with just a click of a button. I gave up on OLD 2 months ago. I don't think I'm going back. Agreed. Hit the nail on the head, not going back either. I'll stick to meeting people in real life.
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