How can i tell this worker to to butt out of my personal life

[Mizz Layta]

I have this co worker that's starting to get on my nerves. I work in big building and he works in different department from me so I don't work with him everyday since I am casual and don't have a permanent position on one floor. I float on different floor replacing the full time workers. I am friendly with him and whenever we see each other in the building or in the parking lot we say hi to each other. However,whenever we do work in the same floor he always make remarks of me and telling me that I need a man. It all started when he asked me if I go to gym and I said yes and he asked why I then told him that I enjoy it and I like to stay in shape. He then said all you need is a man, he will do the job as a joke .I told him that I have someone in my life and that's not the point.

 

 

Now when ever I see him he insist that I don't have a man despite telling him before that I am seeing someone else. He said he doesn't believe it .I don't know why he cares weather I am single or not .He always bring it up whenever I work with him. Last time when he was leaving the floor going in the elevator he said ``I found a boyfriend for you, you have been alone for too long then he went into the elevator .

 

 

Its starting to get on nerves because I am type of person who don't like to discuss my personal life regarding who I am dating at work expect with close friends outside work.I don't see how that has anything to do with him. I am not interested in dating him and I have never showed any interest in him .I just treat him just like how I treat other co workers.

 

 

Should I tell him that I am not interested in dating him even tough he never came out and asked me out and that and my personal life is none of his business?

[d0nnivain]

You have to be clear. Look him in the eyes & say something along the lines of the following:

Thank you for your interest in my life but at this point you are crossing lines. We are work colleagues & I would like to continue that but in order for that to happen you have to butt out of my personal life. Are we clear?

[pink_sugar]

I agree with Donnivain. You need to tell him that his behavior is inappropriate and making you uncomfortable. If he continues, you take it to your HR department. Make sure you document what he says as well as dates.

[jakrbbt]

You shouldn't have to deal with this icky behavior, with anticipating it or even with confronting it. But the reality is, unless you work for a very smart and ethically-run company AND you don't mind an awkward working relationship with this guy in future, you're better off confronting it with him before you report it and ask any supervisors to deal with it. Once, I confronted similar behavior by simply looking bemused and abruptly walking off. It totally worked. The guy clearly thought about what he'd just said and went out of his way to avoid such topics after that--- and now we get along great. But he was smarter than this guy that you're dealing with sounds.

 

Whatever you do, remind yourself every day on the way to work that this isn't your fault, that dealing with unwanted personal comments is not what you were hired to do, and it's a workplace annoyance that you or your company should be able to put a stop to.

[An0nymiss666]

I dealt with a real creep a few years ago at my old job. For a while I tried to be nice, but that didn't do anything. Eventually I became passive aggressive about it, and even that didn't stop him.

 

When confronting it myself didn't work for me, I just let my boss know when I truly got fed up. Which was the day he cornered me to tell me that he had a dream about me...and I think you know what kind of dream I'm talking about. I said I knew it might be considered more of a personal thing, but this guy was starting to make the workday very miserable and uncomfortable for me and I didn't know what else to do at that point.

 

After that, she gave him some sort of write up or warning for inappropriate conduct. He left me alone for a long time after that and seemed pissy as if I violated our non-existent "friendship" or some crap. But I was so glad I let my boss know.

 

Do what d0nnivain recommended, and then take it to your superiors if that doesn't help.