palmtreebeach Posted February 1, 2015 Posted February 1, 2015 I dont know what to do anymore. I met this great guy last year and I fell madly in love with him. At the time we lived in different cities and after a few months of semi long distance dating, I moved in with him. We were planning to be married and start a family. Before I moved in with him I was broken up from my long time ex-boyfriend for about 6 months. My ex-boyfriend got jealous and started harassing me with phone calls and text. I made the mistake of telling my new boyfriend about my old boyfriend still trying to get in touch with me. We started fighting and he accused me of not being faithful, even though it was a lie. He started giving me the cold shoulder for weeks so I assumed he needed space and moved back with my roommate in the city where I am from. After 13 months of dating and making future plans, he found a new girlfriend. I feel like I pushed him to her because he called me several times asking me to come back. I was so angry with how he had treated me, I refused. We slowly stopped talking everyday.. then stopped talking for days at a time. Then one day, he sent me a text saying it was obviously over and he found a new "friend" and thought it was going somewhere quickly. She had moved in with him. He ended it with he hoped I could find someone for myself as great as this girl he found. I was furious!!!! We haven't spoken in about a two months and I can't believe he replaced me like this. The worst part of this is I got **** faced last night, I was so lonely and depressed. I drank a half a bottle of whiskey... I sent him a long text, begging him to forgive me, cursing him out, cursing his new girlfriend out, then begging him to take me back again. When he didn't text back right away, I called him. 5 times. He finally answered and told me to leave him alone. That should be the end of this story, but I cant leave him alone. I feel like a crazy person.. How could he love me that much to have me relocate and change my entire life, talk about marriage and children then treat me like a dirty dog on a rainy day? Why do I still think there is hope? I feel like I can break them up and make him love me again. Did he ever love me? How do men love new women so quickly and replace one after another?
Satu Posted February 2, 2015 Posted February 2, 2015 Here's some general advice: 1. You're still in the crisis phase - you are very hurt, disappointed and angry, but the intensity of your feelings will reduce. 2. Don't suppress your feelings, or tell yourself that you shouldn't be feeling what you're feeling - that never helps. 3. Externalise your feelings by writing them down, talking to a trustworthy person, or using any other mode of expression that feels right. 4. Remind yourself frequently that you can and will have a good life without this person. 5. Tell yourself frequently that you can and will love again. 6. Take care of your body: Eat enough and eat healthily. Drink enough water. Get a bit more rest than you think you need. Do some easy exercise - nothing too strenuous. If you feel physically unwell go to see your doctor. 7. Do not allow yourself to become socially isolated or withdrawn. 8. Establish Total No Contact with your ex. No contact directly, indirectly, or by social media. 9. Keep up with all your responsibilities and things you have to do. 10. Do not use alcohol or drugs in an attempt to self-medicate. 11. Post here as often as you want to. People here want to help. 1
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