the no contact and coldness still got me a chance but i don't know if i should takeit

[calgary]

thank you for always replying, she did this like 3 days before i asked her, so i feel foolish for asking.

[calgary]

p.s. she did seem as interested in it as i did. I can't help the territorial thing, i just want a girl i don't have to share with anybody else. i don't want to think she's with me one night and then at another guys another night, i don't think any guy would like that. I wouldn't call my self territorial in that sense, but if i'm seeing a girl and we're intimate and i'm waiting to pick the right moment i wouldn't expect her to do something like that just because it's not official yet.. and then yeah i do wonder if the fact she did that / the guilt made her decide not to commit and move on ? but it doesn't matter now. I just feel used and silly for still getting upset and not having the strength to trash it and move on. I'm attached to a bad person and struggling to shake them out of my mind, even with the no contact.

[elaine567]

thank you for always replying, she did this like 3 days before i asked her, so i feel foolish for asking.

 

The trouble with people who are still in love with their ex is that they end up getting into relationships with other people and break hearts, when they decide to go back to their ex.

It is an impossible situation, as that other person has often no hope of enticing them away from the ex, if the ex shows any new interest, but the other person is often oblivious to that fact.

 

Don't feel foolish.

She should feel a bit guilty leading you on, when it is obvious now, she was still in love with her ex.

[calgary]

thank you, i hope she does feel guilt , because she came and met me right after seeing im and i introduced her to all of my friends that night, i spent the night with her, drove her home, met her whole family. She seemed closer to me afterwards thinking about it, maybe out of guilt? but she still let me do a lot for her and i'm feeling really bitter about that and upset.

 

everyone keeps telling me the obvious ' let it go, move on, she's a horrible person ' etc and i completely get it and agree i need to. But i'm still thinking about it all constantly about how used i got and how she just went back to school and dropped off of the face of the earth like i don't exist and that hurt too. I wondered if the guilt made her that way?

 

But i'll never know, i went no contact, she hasn't attempted any contact . I don't want her back but i'd love her to know that i know what happened . I feel like it would make me feel better that i don't carry this burden of knowing.

 

I'd love for her to feel guilty and apologise. But that will never happen. It's pointless i just need to get on with my life. I just feel hurt, foolish, used and upset that somebody could do that to me without a care in the world when all i did was care and try.

 

It's just not a nice thing to go through and it's really affected me.

[calgary]

day 20 since we last spoke. Feel proud of that.

 

It's not exactly no contact, since my friends have told me things they considered important for me to know and to help me heal ( such as her cheating, ditching me for another guy who turned out to have a new girlfriend, her going on lots of random (tinder) dates already)

 

I have to agree, knowing this stuff has helped me recover and realize she's not somebody i should date / even be friends with.

 

I'm trying to progress, the problem is, i'm facing rejection in everything i do, i tried to get a new job because i thought a change might help, but i've been to a couple of interviews and not succeeded. In turn, the rejection has affected my confidence.

 

I was meant to go on a date with a girl tonight but she sent me a message earlier saying she's working late and has too much stuff to do.

 

My friends are there for me, but all anybody wants to do is get drunk and i don't think that's really doing me any good right now.

 

Trying so hard to progress but the rejection is just setting me back.

 

I don't understand because a couple of months ago i was getting job offers all over the country, girls were chasing me but i was obviously seeing this one so i rejected them and now i sit here feeling like exactly the same guy and yet i seem to be repelling everything i want. I'll keep taking the hits and moving forward though i'm still motivated to do better for myself.

 

It would be nice to hear from this girl just for an ego boost, but by the sounds of all the dates she's going on she's not going to care less about me right now.

 

I probably just need to hear some advice from people that lost their confidence after a break up and constantly got hit with rejection.

 

I wonder if my misery is just visible and discouraging people from giving me a chance.