He was so lovely to me when I last saw him and now he's acting differently

[recycledheart]

basically I've been seeing this guy for a little while now and a couple of days ago we met up and went back to his place for the first time. Yes, we did sleep together. Afterwards we ordered pizza and just sat in his bed watching a movie, chatting, kissing a bit.

 

He asked me if I'd like to see him again, he asked when, he wanted me to stay over that night but I didn't have any of my stuff with me. I said I was happy to just wear the same clothes the next day but he said he didn't want me doing the 'walk of shame'. He then said that if I went home that night, would I like to come over to stay the next day, to which I said Yes. He asked me to text him as soon as I got home so he knew I was safe - and I did. Just before I left he told me I was beautiful.

 

This guy has a pretty crazy, hectic job, and he's always travelling about the local area, he doesn't really have a set end of the day when it comes to work either, he just finishes whenever everything he needs to do is done. He text me about noon the following day and said he had no idea when he'd be done as a 'big disaster' had happened - I didn't ask what it was. I left it until around five and sent him a message asking if everything was still on for me to stay over. He said he couldn't as because of this 'disaster' he had to drive 4 hours back to his parents' house to pick up his drivers licence and passport. He said "I can do tomorrow though."

 

So again I left him to it for a few hours then messaged him again asking if he arrived ok and if his family were happy to see him. All of his replies were clipped, short and blunt - mostly 2 word answers.

 

I don't know what's going on here, it was HIM asking to see me again, HIM wanting me to stay over again - and now he's acting like he doesn't want it anymore. If he said all this BEFORE having sex with me I'd realise he probably said it to get into my pants, it's the fact that he said it all afterwards. Surely he wouldn't say all those lovely things if he didn't mean it? It's today actually that I'm meant to finally be staying over and I'm too afraid to text to see if it's still on and it was me initiating the messaging yesterday and I got the impression that I was annoying him. When I asked if he was busy and wanted to be left alone, he said "for a little x". That was early last night.

 

He's driving back around lunch time today so should I wait until around 5 to ask if everything's still on? What do you guys think about this whole thing?

[Gaeta]

Calm down....

 

There is nothing wrong. You had sex that night, he acted attentive afterwards, he invited you to come back, asked you to call him once you got home and he called you the following day. He did everything right.

 

The problem is you, because you've had sex for the first time you feel vulnerable and need extra reassurance. You are so afraid sex may have changed things for him that you see withdrawal where there is none.

 

He told you he had an emergency, sounds like a family emergency. Let him take care of business. Do NOT contact him again, you've done enough of that. When he comes back he will let you know and you can resume with your plans. If when he comes back he is too tired to have you over then don't start thinking something is wrong. A man is allowed to be tired after a long drive and family drama.