JackJackxD Posted January 30, 2015 Posted January 30, 2015 Me and my Ex were together for 2.5 years and broke up 4 months ago. We tried to stay friends but things didn't work out. I asked her for a second chance around 3 months into break up, and she rejected it. She said that we shouldn't talk to each other for a few months for things to calm down first. Since then I've had no contact with her. Today I was talking to a mutual friend, and she told me that there is no hope in reconciliation. Apparently when they went out, my Ex said that she simply cannot be friends with me because she doesn't want to talk to me and doesn't like me. When they talked about a stalker incident that happened to their friend, my Ex immediate asked "Is it Jack?"" and "He is like the strangest/creepiest/weirdest guy I know (can't remember the exact word". Thinking back, today when I saw my Ex she also looked at me really coldly and then quickly turned away. Knowing all these things made me pretty sad. I mean, I didn't treat her badly to the point where I deserve all these hatred. She was the one who broke up with me because I disappointed her over and over again. It was both of our first relationship, and I was very inexperienced. I did things like getting too close to my female friends, complementing other girls in front of her. She also made mistakes too. But did I really do something that bad to the point where she hates my guts? During our relationship I stayed true to her, I genuinely cared about her, and the love was real. So is it just a natural thing that girls all hate their Ex? Is there anyway to reverse that or change their views? I am still in love with that girl, but she seems to have moved on pretty quickly already.
d0nnivain Posted January 30, 2015 Posted January 30, 2015 Girls are young. They are still growing into themselves & who they will be as adults. Young people of both genders have a tendency toward all or nothing with limited ability to see the middle grounds. More mature women can be a bit more balanced and charitable in their approaches. She probably doesn't hate you unless you cheated on her or something else really awful but she can't handle anything with you in the short term because all of the emotions are too raw. Years after the fact you may be friendly but it's almost impossible to be just friends with an EX plus any new people you date will hate your connection to that EX & it will most likely poison your new relationship. So just be done with her. She's your past. 2
me85 Posted January 30, 2015 Posted January 30, 2015 No, not all girls/women hate their ex. My ex was God awful towards me but I never have and never will hate him because I'm better than that. Good people don't hate, they rise above and deal with things maturely. It's funny because most guys have a real problem with being disliked. I remember my ex being so worried that I hated him. Don't worry yourself with "what ifs." If she is saying those mean things about you then it's best to do everything in your power to avoid dwelling on it and letting it get you down. There's nothing you can do about it anyways. People see you the way they see you and it doesn't make them experts about who you are. Tell mutual friends you'd rather them keep any and all info regarding your ex to themselves. You're better off not knowing what she's saying or doing. Feel better champ. 1
bigtrouble Posted January 31, 2015 Posted January 31, 2015 So is it just a natural thing that girls all hate their Ex? Is there anyway to reverse that or change their views? I am still in love with that girl, but she seems to have moved on pretty quickly already. I think it really depends on the person... They may be swayed by emotions... But when they no longer feel the connection... they can be brutally honest and just ignore you... Love was never deep enough... Besides when you fall out of love... Falling in Love again with the same person is a conscious choice... This is where it gets rowdy if they decide not to... Or just find somebody else or just be alone... This is the part where they feel a sense of relief and just walk away...
Litlikeamonument Posted January 31, 2015 Posted January 31, 2015 I agree with me85. My ex did/said some pretty horrendous things to me over my course of time with him, but I never hated him. I did have a lot of anger towards myself for allowing myself to be treated the way that I was. If I had to assume, I would guess that it is just easier for her to move on by having no contact with you. The best you can do for yourself is worry about you and what makes you happy, afterall living well is the best revenge. Either she will realize she made a mistake and will come back and then the ball will be in your court, or life will bring you the right person. Either way if you are putting yourself first you can't go wrong! Best of luck to you!
Author JackJackxD Posted January 31, 2015 Author Posted January 31, 2015 I guess the only thing I can do right now is to just forget about her. It sucks so much to see how someone who once loved you becoming someone like this. To her, I am like the worst human being on earth and everything I do agitates her. It sucks to know that there is nothing I can do now that can even slightly change her view about me. And Me85, I have no problem being disliked by others. It's just that I am still in love with my Ex, and hearing hateful things said about me breaks my heart. Litlikeamonument, she told me before that she has moved on from this relationship already. But why is it that even though she has moved on she still bears a grudge against me?
bigtrouble Posted January 31, 2015 Posted January 31, 2015 It sucks so much to see how someone who once loved you becoming someone like this. To her, I am like the worst human being on earth and everything I do agitates her. It sucks to know that there is nothing I can do now that can even slightly change her view about me. I surely feel your pain, but nothing we can do about it... Its really diabolical, they nurture that thought to kill guilt...
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