frustratedturtle Posted January 29, 2015 Posted January 29, 2015 Girlfriend of 2 years breaks up with me because she "feels that she needs to be single right now." She told me that she felt like she wanted to work on herself and focus on herself before she could commit to me or anyone else. She said our relationship was great, no problems, but that she felt like she wanted to feel good by herself before making a commitment. Flash forward a couple months after the breakup she comes by the house and picks up things. She's visually upset, says she's "lost." Says she is still very confused, feels like she could marry me. Flash forward to 3 more months after that, she says she is still confused, but this time she has feelings for this girl but also feels she could marry me. She says she is, "In a confused and emotional state" right now. HELL. I'm confused. I don't know what to think. I haven't texted/called with the exception of Thanksgiving and Christmas to wish her happy a holiday. We then we texted a bit for a couple hours on those days. She has sent me random things here and there - about her pets or a funny video, but hasn't really talked to me otherwise, I want to desperately talk to her, but I feel it's best to leave her be. I don't know what to think. Is she really confused? Will this rebound girl phase last? (She even admitted that she doesn't see a future with her and that she knows she's a rebound.) She even mentioned that she sees a future with me! (UGH so confusing) I feel like I'm holding on to false hope. But I don't know what to do right now. I hate feeling like I'm being strung along I guess I know that if she wanted me back she would tell me... but I'm upset also because I told her earlier in our break up that it was hurting me with her still texting me and I asked her to stop so I could move on, and that if she wanted to talk about us or our relationship that would be the only exception - she agreed and stated that it was probably best for her to get to a better place before contacting me. (She broke that "rule" and texted me since) But I feel like me telling her to stay away is hurting my chances of reconciliation. This sucks. What the hell is so confusing?
LovelyDaze Posted January 29, 2015 Posted January 29, 2015 But I don't know what to do right now. I hate feeling like I'm being strung along I guess I know that if she wanted me back she would tell me... but I'm upset also because I told her earlier in our break up that it was hurting me with her still texting me and I asked her to stop so I could move on, and that if she wanted to talk about us or our relationship that would be the only exception - she agreed and stated that it was probably best for her to get to a better place before contacting me. (She broke that "rule" and texted me since) But I feel like me telling her to stay away is hurting my chances of reconciliation. This sucks. What the hell is so confusing? Because she can't make a confirmed decision about what and who she wants. Your ex is all over the place emotionally and is dragging you and her rebound gf into her dramatics. You both, on purpose, have broken NC in the past by texting each other often and that is why neither one of you can let go. Telling her to not contact you unless she is serious about a reconciliation WAS great but as you now know, she wasn't. Go into NC yourself to get out of the drama and don't cling to if doing so hurts your chances of reconciling. To be honest, NC is your BEST chance at it. It surely isn't what is going on now, is it? Now make no mistake, NC is not to be used as a tool to "win" your ex back. It is for you to heal from the mess you are in. Let her sort out what is in her head and in her heart without texting/calling you, seeing the gf, dragging both of you along all of this confusion, etc. Let the dust settle so things get clearer. 1
Satu Posted January 29, 2015 Posted January 29, 2015 HELL. I'm confused. This sucks. What the hell is so confusing? There's nothing confusing here. Your relationship has ended. You need to adapt to that reality.
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