Hooti Posted January 28, 2015 Posted January 28, 2015 I broke up an hour ago with my boyfriend of 2 years. He said we dont have any chemistry and he cant develop it as well. He said "we are not made for each other" My heart is shredded into pieces. I am feeling v scared and panicky and I am feeling depressed and cried so much that my face is swollen... Even as I preview my post, I am crying.
myheartaches Posted January 28, 2015 Posted January 28, 2015 Oh gosh honey I know the feeling I truly do. After my break up I went into another depressive episode. 24/7 anxiety, I wasn't eating, it was sooooo very hard to be alone bc then my thoughts would haunt me. I had to take Xanax in order for me to sleep. I cried to my mom when it happened. I forced her to hurry home bc I was having an anxiety attack. Then at night I went to the gym and chatted with my best friend about what happened. It is sooooooooo sooo good to talk to your female friends. You need the support honey because the feeling of being alone will destroy you okay?? I'm here to talk if you need me to. I promise you, it will get bearable okay? It will take several months, I will not lie. But the panic will eventually go away okay?
KBarletta Posted January 28, 2015 Posted January 28, 2015 myheartaches is right - it will get better, but it will take time. It's important to not spend too much time alone right now. Talk to friends, even if it's just on the phone. Write your thoughts down, keep a journal. It helps to express your feelings, even if it's just to yourself. Make an appointment with a therapist if you think it will help. Cry when you need to Just get it out. You'll feel better. Also, I know it's hard, but try to exercise, eat well, get out of the house, even if it's just to walk around. Do not spend all your time looking at four walls and feeling sorry for yourself. Blast some angry music if you think it will help. Hang in there!
dyna85 Posted January 28, 2015 Posted January 28, 2015 Oh God. The early hours are excruciating. Heck, one hour ago. That's brutal. I'm so sorry to hear this happened to you. How the heck can he claim there is no chemistry after 2 yrs together? That sounds crazy. I'm so sorry you're in such pain. Just breathe. You will be okay. Allow the tears to flow. Don't worry...we're here to help support you. ::hugs:: Myheartaches is right...it will take months, but the panic will subside. I know you can't imagine it at this moment, but it will... Take it one step at a time. Moment to moment.
LovelyDaze Posted January 28, 2015 Posted January 28, 2015 (edited) Hold on. It will be okay. We ALL here know it doesn't feel that way AT ALL standing where you are right now. We have been there. But you will come out of this not only fine, but stronger than you ever thought possible. Come on here anytime you feel a need to contact him about what just happened. There are some wonderful people on LS that will have your back and walk you through this. Edited January 28, 2015 by LovelyDaze
towardthefuture Posted January 28, 2015 Posted January 28, 2015 Ohhh the panic attacks, those are rough. You may get those for a while, your body is going to be pumped full of adrenaline for a long time. They suck but don't worry they'll go away. When you get one try to breathe in and out through your nose and concentrate only on the feeling of your breath. If you can get your mind into a calm state your body should follow after about 20 minutes. That helped me at least. You won't be able to shake the feelings -- just feel it. It's going to be a rollercoaster. The stages of grief aren't like a straight line it's more like a mixtape. You'll feel better I promise
brigirl92 Posted January 28, 2015 Posted January 28, 2015 Just last week, my boyfriend broke up with me for similar reasons. I won't go into detail, but he doesn't see us getting married and continuing dating me would be a waste. Trust, that night I cried without notice. Even the next day I cried without notice. Do what everyone else is telling you to do and just allow yourself to feel it. Every time I cried, i felt a lot better afterwards. And you know what, the crying sessions are definitely fewer and far between with this just only being a week. I still miss him dearly, but what has helped me is keeping busy, talking to loved ones, and venting on these forums. Also, I would suggest no contacting your ex right now, no matter how good terms you might be on. Me and my ex's split was amicable, we've expressed our love to each other even after the breakup, etc. But in this time where you are really missing what was, communication with him will make you wish for things to be how they were, and they aren't. Don't put yourself in that position to be dissapointed all over again. He should understand. Take this time to be selfish, enjoy yourself, and do things to better yourself. Trust me, it has only been a week and I have strong hopes of it getting better
Hija77 Posted January 29, 2015 Posted January 29, 2015 It's only been a few hours! You poor thing. It will get better. It's going to take some time, but getting over heartache often does. I had a break up about 3 months ago, and I know how sad and scary it can be...BUT, you have a chance at a completely different life now!!! A clean slate. Like everyone else has been saying, please take good care of yourself. Eat right, get some fresh air, exercise, sleep regularly, hang out with your friends,etc. It's ok to be devastated. Don't kick yourself for still caring about him, either. That is a wicked and worthless mind trick to play on yourself. Good luck and keep posting if you need support.
gnick Posted January 29, 2015 Posted January 29, 2015 I really feel for you. I used to get panic attacks and it is not fun. What worked for me was to control my breathing and concentrate on something peaceful
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