Kaiten Posted January 21, 2015 Posted January 21, 2015 I met a girl named Ashley and she and I liked each other. At the time we liked each other, I was already in a relationship, so I didn't know what to do. It shocked the hell outta me, honestly. I just left it alone. And Ashley flirted with me once or twice, but it was no huge deal. Then my relationship ended. Ashley then dropped some hints and gestures (and apparently I was the only one who didn't pick up on it). I kinda pushed her away because the girl I broke up with was also around and I just didn't want Ashley to look like a rebound. Fast forward 2 years. I liked Ashley, but she was no longer comfortable with being around me because at one point I said I didn't believe in God and she's a super-christian type (meaning church is almost her entire life). Now she does all this stuff to be friends, apparently. Ashley is a really nice girl, but she does some things that a person I don't like does. For instance: 1) If I ask her a question she doesn't want to answer, she won't tell me. She'll just ignore it what I said and change the topic. Like I'm a dumbass kid or something. 2) She won't talk to me past a certain time (10:30pm) under any circumstances - even if I know she's awake. I guess to have a boundary?? Seems too childish for people in their early 20's to me. 3) For the most part, doesn't talk to me, and certainly doesn't want to go anywhere with me. I feel like she initiates conversation only to make sure that I'll still talk to her. Those are the three biggest things. To me, she doesn't feel like a friend at all. I am the only guy she does this with. It used to be a bit awkward (and hurtful) to have to handle her this way, but now it's just downright annoying. I really just want to tell her, "Look, I know you say 'lets be friends', but you do not act like a friend at all. I feel like I'm obligated to talk to you to keep from hurting your feelings." It's gotten to the point where, as much as I care about this girl, I am starting to dislike her as a person. I don't want to hurt her feelings by telling the truth, but I do want her to stop this.
flitzanu Posted January 22, 2015 Posted January 22, 2015 I met a girl named Ashley and she and I liked each other. At the time we liked each other, I was already in a relationship, so I didn't know what to do. It shocked the hell outta me, honestly. I just left it alone. And Ashley flirted with me once or twice, but it was no huge deal. Then my relationship ended. Ashley then dropped some hints and gestures (and apparently I was the only one who didn't pick up on it). I kinda pushed her away because the girl I broke up with was also around and I just didn't want Ashley to look like a rebound. Fast forward 2 years. I liked Ashley, but she was no longer comfortable with being around me because at one point I said I didn't believe in God and she's a super-christian type (meaning church is almost her entire life). Now she does all this stuff to be friends, apparently. Ashley is a really nice girl, but she does some things that a person I don't like does. For instance: 1) If I ask her a question she doesn't want to answer, she won't tell me. She'll just ignore it what I said and change the topic. Like I'm a dumbass kid or something. 2) She won't talk to me past a certain time (10:30pm) under any circumstances - even if I know she's awake. I guess to have a boundary?? Seems too childish for people in their early 20's to me. 3) For the most part, doesn't talk to me, and certainly doesn't want to go anywhere with me. I feel like she initiates conversation only to make sure that I'll still talk to her. Those are the three biggest things. To me, she doesn't feel like a friend at all. I am the only guy she does this with. It used to be a bit awkward (and hurtful) to have to handle her this way, but now it's just downright annoying. I really just want to tell her, "Look, I know you say 'lets be friends', but you do not act like a friend at all. I feel like I'm obligated to talk to you to keep from hurting your feelings." It's gotten to the point where, as much as I care about this girl, I am starting to dislike her as a person. I don't want to hurt her feelings by telling the truth, but I do want her to stop this. you're not obligated to talk to her, you're choosing to talk to her. what law is there that forces you to communicate with this girl?
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